Thought experiment:

Toni Morrison is at a cocktail party at Princeton with her colleagues, English professors and other visiting novelists. She uses the word "niggardly" in conversation. Is this okay because:

A) She's Toni Fucking Morrison, bitch!
B) She's Nobel prize winning Toni Morrison.
C) She's a novelist.
D) She's black.
E) She's a novelist and black and it is presumed she both knows how to use the word and that she's sensitive to how it might be misconstrued.
F) It's okay because she knows the people she's talking to will not misconstrue it or be offended.

I think it's mostly F. Though A can't be discounted.

I was not aware that the word jipped/gypped was not spelled "jipped" until relatively recently. I was never corrected for spelling it jipped in writing. I don't think most people of my acquaintance--excepting the obvious examples here--have any clue that it's a reference to gypsies and if forced to spell it would use jip.

If you have to explain why it's offensive, I think it loses some of the offense. "Jewed", however, you'd have to claim profound, willing ignorance to not see the offense.

All of the above... actually, I think she has written it before. Not that I know everything she writes, but I've read a few.

Sidebar, but man do I hate the term 'political correctness.'

I have studiously avoided that phrase while slipping in slippery allusions to the "language of the left."

Sidebar, but man do I hate the term 'political correctness.' It's almost always used as a blanket condemnation that does not acknowledge the tension to which you are referring and the complicated algorithm I mentioned earlier.

Smonster is me in this case. I hate that people have found a condescension short-cut towards my aspirations to be a more decent human being.

I see absolutely no way that "Gyped", once someone knows the origin, is acceptable to use. I have left a table in a restaurant when someone used the "N" word. When I hear "Gyped", I'll usually smile broadly and ask if the person knows the origin. Usually, they're surprised and horrified, and vow to not use it again. I'd leave the company of that person in a minute if they proclaimed to know the origin and still used it. It's gross. And I am in no way a prude. I also recoil and say something if I hear "jewed".

I heard my boyfriend say "Dallas Cowgirls" once, had a talk with him, and he stopped using it.

I am really sensitive to this (using feminine characteristics as derogatory) right now even moreso than usual because of the recent gang-rape of a 15 year old in Richmond, CA. The brutality was bad enough, but the thing that really stung and has stayed with me, was a witness statement that started off with "that bitch, dude was taking her down, and she kicked him in the [nuts] and then it was game on". I have nightmares about it, and it's making me rethink entirely how nonchalant I've been about women's issues and the sad reality that to many people all over the world, we are one step above cattle. I'd like to say I've rediscovered my anger about this, but that would be a lie. I've never been angry enough.

using inverted commas to show that I don't like the term, either.

I didn't think you did, I just needed to vent.

my sister thinks AutoPay is a terrible idea, but it's a helluva lot better idea than screwing my credit and getting services turned off because in a bout of depression I forgot to pay the bills for a couple months.

I'm still coming around to this, instead of doing the way I *should* do it.

being someplace at a certain time, almost every day, dressed, showered, and functional, is virtually impossible for me, and my boss's understanding was wearing thin.

This is the situation I'm in.

So misers are greedy and niggardly people are stingy?

Novelists don't get a special bye.

I don't think writers do, either. And I do think there is a difference in creating a fictional racist/xenophobic character and, you know, not.

What it boils down to is everyone is perfectly free to choose any word, and everyone else is perfectly free to judge them accordingly.

Also, I'm instructed to inform you all that a seven-foot tall can agrees with me.

And now I'm going home, and may not be on as much, so please don't think I'm flouncing.

I have studiously avoided that phrase while slipping in slippery allusions to the "language of the left."

Don't think we didn't notice.

Okay, really gone, now.

Ha! A little on-topic, but hilariously Buffitastic!

I thought it was "jipped" when I was a kid too. When I found out it was a flat-out nasty racist slur I stopped using it even though I don't personally know any Gypsys to be offended by it. I don't see anything complex or vague about that, its called "growing up".

I can see both sides in "douche". My tie-breaker is that it is fun to say so I do. (My one sister is agin' and says "enema" -- which is not fun to say)

I don't use it around my sister. Or French people.

It appears that "Pussy" as "weak and ineffectual" comes from a non-female-genitalia source. [link] Similar to niggardly, however, you get the homonym thing. Again I break the tie with "fun to say."

So I guess if someone were arguing "gypped" is "fun to say" they might gain a little ground with me... but not enough to tip the balance what with the "flat out ethnic slur" being on the other side.

I'm still coming around to this, instead of doing the way I *should* do it.

Oh, the "shoulds". Bastards. I fight with them every day. In that case, I told myself, okay, what is it that I really *should* do? Pay my bills on time, or write out the damn checks myself and balance my checkbook immediately? (I never balance my checkbook; I don't even write the checks down anymore. And it's *fine*.)

This is the situation I'm in.

I thought you might be. I'm sorry; I wish I knew some way to make it easier.