I don't really have a security blanket... unless you count Mr. Pointy.

Buffy ,'Lessons'


Spike's Bitches 45: That sure as hell wasn't in the brochure.  

[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.


Steph L. - Nov 12, 2009 11:16:50 am PST #322 of 30000
the hardest to learn / was the least complicated

the social model of disability

Seska, is that the idea that (and I know I'm VASTLY simplifying here), rather than the disabled person trying adapt to the environment -- or, in the case of some mental illnesses, "get better" -- that the environment should adapt to *their* needs?


erikaj - Nov 12, 2009 11:23:12 am PST #323 of 30000
Always Anti-fascist!

Yeah. In the tribe, I say "gimp" and "crip" but not usually Out There and I have ripped some House fangirls pretty intensely for this. The irony did not escape me. There are times I wish he didn't do that quite so much. And I sent Corwood a pitch once that my biographers would find pretty damn vulgar...if he had co-editors I didn't know, I'd totally have 'splaining to do.


Seska (the Watcher-in-Training) - Nov 12, 2009 11:25:17 am PST #324 of 30000
"We're all stories, in the end. Just make it a good one, eh?"

Steph: Basically, yeah. It's the concept that society disables people, rather than conditions/impairments disabling us. Which is why I prefer 'disabled' to 'person with a disability' - the passive verb puts the onus on society, rather than on me, to change. NB: Many disabled people, especially in the US, prefer 'person-first' language. I mostly just try to respect what other people want to be called. That said, 'differently-abled' emphasises diversity, which is fine to a certain point, without challenging society on its oppression.

Example. My confirmation classes are being held in a room which is up six stone steps. This is oppression (especially as my knee has been partially dislocated, and very painful, all day today as a result). It's about being disabled by society. To my mind, the 'differently-abled' idea reinforces the view that my difference can be dealt with through an acceptance of diversity alone. It's nice that my priest respects my differences. It's less nice that he won't move the sodding confirmation class.

*Seska is dealing with the confirmation class-related stress. Yes, she really is.*

In the tribe, I say "gimp" and "crip" but not usually Out There and I have ripped some House fangirls pretty intensely for this. The irony did not escape me. There are times I wish he didn't do that quite so much.

Yes - 'House' is making 'cripple' a more widespread phenomenon of language than it really needs to be.


DavidS - Nov 12, 2009 11:27:07 am PST #325 of 30000
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

I simply don't see why, with the richness of language (not just English), one would choose to use a term like "niggardly" or "gypped". "Miserly" and "cheated" work just fine, thanks.

First of all the sound and rhythms of the words are valuable to me as a writer. They're not the same words. Second the meanings shade differently. Finally, I don't think the exception or line that people want to make between allowances for fiction writers and other speech is a clear bright line.

Language is much more fluid than that, and I certainly don't know a non-fiction writer that doesn't avail themself of elements of fictional rhetoric in their writing.

To Teppy's question, I certainly don't see it as binary at all. In fact, I spent a long time couching my main argument as a subtle weighting and balancing of different values, implying (I think) a spectrum.

To Jilli's question, I did specifically note the importance of context and responsibility of the speaker. I am not asserting my right call somebody names or something they consider objectionable.

I am, however, asserting my right to call rhumba sleeves gay. Even to a straight man from Argentina who is wearing them.

To Seska, I also think "differently abled" is patronizing and used it purposefully as a dodgy phrase. I'm sorry if I didn't make that clear.


smonster - Nov 12, 2009 11:28:37 am PST #326 of 30000
We won’t stop until everyone is gay.

I'm not advocating for racial or ethnic slurs.

You advocated for "gypped."

Though I will note that if people want to find a way to express their xenophobia or racism they'll find it.

Again, no one is arguing that they won't. I am arguing that people who don't want to be presumed racist or xenophobic oughten't use words that they are aware will cause offense.

Too damaging to language in relation to whatever presumed damage is done to the mentally ill by that word.

Part of the deal is that you don't get to decide what the "presumed damage" is. I admit that "crazy" is a bit far out, and I explained my personal reasons for that. I'm not calling for a ban on use of the term and admitted that I will probably always use it.

Deciding what words are and are not appropriate is a complex formula involving history, etymology, perception, privilege, precision, etc. It changes over time. How a people or group likes to be referred to or what they find offensive changes. I accept that and honor it.


erikaj - Nov 12, 2009 11:29:17 am PST #327 of 30000
Always Anti-fascist!

Yes, it's funny when he does it. But he's Hugh Laurie and he's smarter than you. ktksbai.


Steph L. - Nov 12, 2009 11:30:09 am PST #328 of 30000
the hardest to learn / was the least complicated

Example. My confirmation classes are being held in a room which is up six stone steps. This is oppression (especially as my knee has been partially dislocated, and very painful, all day today as a result) - it's being disabled by society.

I've only read a little about the social model of disability, and that only recently. What I read related to mental illness, and, as someone with major depression that has proven pretty strongly that it will not be "cured," I admit that the social model threw me for a loop. Why? I had always considered that it was my job to take drugs, go to therapy, and then I'd "be cured."

This is not the case for me, which you (Seska) wouldn't know, since you're new-ish here. But a lot of the Buffistas have seen me go through periods of trying to go off antidepressants and the MASSIVE relapse that follows.

Anyway. The idea that I shouldn't be apologizing for my inability to be "cured," but that maybe some areas of my life should accommodate my needs, was a revolutionary idea.


erikaj - Nov 12, 2009 11:32:44 am PST #329 of 30000
Always Anti-fascist!

I know, it is. And I don't live up to it all the time and not just because I'm lame about lame.


smonster - Nov 12, 2009 11:34:07 am PST #330 of 30000
We won’t stop until everyone is gay.

First of all the sound and rhythms of the words are valuable to me as a writer.

They are valuable to me as a polyglot and a language geek. See above re: "lesbian" vs. "dyke."*

They're not the same words. Second the meanings shade differently.

Honestly curious - explain the nuances between niggardly and miserly. Because I parse them the same and I haven't been able to find a distinction in the online dictionaries and thesaureses I consulted.

* but see, I'm a part of those communities, and I know not everyone agrees with me, and I will stop using a term to describe someone if she tells me she finds it offensive.


Steph L. - Nov 12, 2009 11:34:40 am PST #331 of 30000
the hardest to learn / was the least complicated

To Teppy's question, I certainly don't see it as binary at all. In fact, I spent a long time couching my main argument as a subtle weighting and balancing of different values, implying (I think) a spectrum.

You addressed a point I didn't make. When I said initially that it's weak writing that can't express a concept in a different way, you addressed that with descriptions of watered-down evasive political speech. Not with descriptions of a spectrum.

It's not worth arguing about, but you either misunderstood me, or you're dodging my point.