This might not be entertaining, but I can infodump:
Tim got a new suit, and the jacket fits quite well (though it could be tailored just a wee bit more, but it's good enough for the funeral), and the pants were hemmed overnight.
He looks DAMN GOOD in that suit, I gotta tell you. (Black, single-breast, 2 buttons, European cut [slimmer, and 2 vents in back on the jacket].)
t /shallow
The funeral is a Catholic mass, and because Tim's parents are so active in that church (and WAY into Catholicism), his dad instructed us (that's really the only word for it) on how Tim and I were to handle the issue of communion time.
You know how, you go to a wedding (or a funeral), and it's Catholic, and you're not, or you are Catholic but don't intend to take communion for your own reasons? And so you stay in the pew when it's communion time?
Tim's dad told us that we are to walk up with everyone else and then when we get to the priest, we cross our arms over our chest (to indicate that we aren't taking communion) and bow our heads for a blessing anyway, because "staying in the pew is just tacky." His brother and brothers' family has been instructed to do the same thing, because they are Lutheran.
Does anyone here know if that's a real thing? The walking up and crossing one's arms? I've never been to a mass where I've seen people do that, and frankly, it seems weird and awkward, like "Look! WE ARE NOT CATHOLIC UP HERE!!!"
But I told Tim that there's a LOT I'm willing to do to comfort his dad, and doing that is not the same as agreeing to return to the Catholic fold, and even though I think it's awkward (so does Tim), I'll do it. A funeral is not the time to make a statement about religion.
But -- I had just never heard of that practice before. I'm used to people just staying in their pews. Anyone else ever heard of that?
Does anyone here know if that's a real thing? The walking up and crossing one's arms?
It is completely a real thing. I used to be a Eucharistic minister, and was totally used to people doing that. However, you generally skip the wine, at that point--only do it for the bread.
ETA: it was more common for people who were Catholic but not comfortable getting communion--like adults who were becoming part of the church but hadn't yet completed the Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults, or for serious believers who hadn't been to confession or who were divorced and didn't believe they could receive communion, etc. Generally NSM for non-Catholics (because, hey, WTF do they care about a priest's blessing). But that's not to say they COULDN"T get it!!
Does anyone here know if that's a real thing? The walking up and crossing one's arms?
It is completely a real thing. I used to be a Eucharistic minister, and was totally used to people doing that. However, you generally skip the wine, at that point--only do it for the bread.
I was just coming back here to say that I just found stuff on the interpipe that talks about it. I'll be damned.
(Pun intended.)
I'm totally non-religious, but that sounds like something I would be totes willing to do.
A blessing is just a wish for goodness and peace, right? No harm in anyone wishing that, IMHO.
I don't mind doing it, other than it just sounded awkward to me, like it would be broadcasting "LOOK AT THE INFIDELS UP HERE!!!" But if it's common, then I guess we won't be run out with pitchforks and crucifixes.
Maybe mention it to the priest beforehand? That way, he just does his thing, and there's no awkward dance around the Eucharist?
Tim's dad has already told the priest about his son and family who are Lutheran, because they'll have to do the same thing. So I assume he probably told the priest about us, too. And maybe it's commonplace at their parish, I don't know.
Oops. I totally stayed in the pew when I went to my friend's ordination. Maybe Episcopalians handle it differently?
My old parish is in SoCal and it's common there as well. In fact, the priest usually announces it at the beginning of communion - announces that folks who don't want to receive Communion are welcome to come up and cross their arms across their chests (pharoah-style) to indicate they're not receiving communion but would be happy with a blessing instead.
