My sister spent several months sending out thank yous after her wedding. People started sending her gifts from the time they announced until well after. A gift arriving the day of is in the cue but not at the top of it.

Oh, there is a world of difference between theorhetical prostitution (which we were pretty clearly discussing) and actual prostitution (which almost always, it seems, involves some aspect of coercion). One of the reasons coercion is so effective is the immense SHAME connected with sex work. I'm not going to claim that a blithe discussion of prostitution is going to solve the worlds ills, but neither can I see that (particularly in this context) it would do any harm.

I had them delivered to the house. I'd hoped that they would get there the day before the wedding, but they were delivered the morning of.

I'm not going to claim that a blithe discussion of prostitution is going to solve the worlds ills, but neither can I see that (particularly in this context) it would do any harm.

Totally. I think this discussion has been thoughtful and acknowledges the problems with the reality of prostitution and porn, but is still able to talk about it without going to either end of the spectrum (i.e., one end would be "Hookers and porn are ALWAYS AWESOME and anyone who says they aren't is clearly a wrongheaded fool who just needs to watch the right porn!" and the other end would be "Anyone who thinks that anything at all about porn or prostitution is okay in any context is a fool who is DESTROYING SOCIETY by their very thoughts!").

Which is why I love alla y'alls so much.

I am deeply ashamed of the fact that we haven't finished sending thank you notes yet. That's going to happen this coming week since we will both be home, but we're disgustingly late.

In this, I am my tag line.

Vortex, in your shoes, I might give them a call, and say something along the lines of, "I sent flowers, and noticed that the Fed Ex receipt said they were left at your house at the time I know you were out, so I wanted to double check that they did not grow legs and end up swiped and given to some pimply-assed teenager's girlfriend." Things like that do happen, and if you need to make a claim from Fed Ex, you want to be able to get to it ASAP.

I would hire myself out as a professional date, but even then, it would probably only be for a guy that could get his own date, and where does that leave you?

ita, a friend of mine did this as a bodyguard. She was the hottie who could then protect the guy, I guess.

I didn't really see the point, because her presence would in no way be a deterrent against starting something, but I guess some guys get a kick out of having a date who could kick someone's ass.

I think you would be hard pressed to find many, if any, feminist critics of prostitution who blame the prostitutes.

Hasn't been hard at all, actually, more's the pity.

Huh. That really has not been my experience.

The routine-ness of sexual violence against sex workers is dreadful. In this country more than half of female sex workers have been raped and 75% physically assaulted by clients/pimps. It's horrific.

I wish that surprised me. I wish. These men, many men, do not see a prostitute as a woman doing a job. She is not even a person. She is an object they have rented to do with what they please.

Seska, I look forward to checking out your organization.

In a perfect world, no one would be forced to do anything. In this one, we need to protect each other.

Bless you my child. [That, right there, tangentially speaking, is why I have major problems with (what I understand to be) Libertarian political philosophy. All talk, very little walk.

Seska, I'm curious--I totally grok not being a fan of the general porn industry that most stuff comes from--it seems from what I've read/seen to be a fucked up place that does few people any favors. When you say you're against porn, do you mean because it's basically coming from that? Or just...in general? I ask because while mostly I'm more a reader than a viewer (and from what you say about erotica, I'm assuming when you reference "porn" you mean visual, not written), but when I do view, it tends to be very much women-for-women stuff--the dyke feminist porn. Stuff made by and for a queer audience, with a queer gaze. With hot butch women in it (yum!). ...and some of it has had my friends in it! (Though I generally try to avoid those bits, cause ew.) And I have a hard time finding that objectionable, or seeing how it's really hurting anyone.