(Cashier looks at strange spice). "What do you use this in?" "Oh I'm trying out a new Indian recipe!" Then at the end, "Good luck with your recipe!"
I would find that really weird and somewhat off-putting. It's not that it's wrong, it's just that it's not what I'm used to. The only stores where I can imagine that conversation happening would be places like little health food stores where the cashier is also the owner, where I'm a regular customer and the owner is keeping up with what people are buying so that she can figure out what to order more of.
And I've been there and have to say that just because a person is on the other side of a counter does not mean that they are not a human being. Acknowledging that with eye contact and a sentence or two is not that big a deal.
My snarling about (what feels to me to be) invasive questioning aside, yes be polite. Exchange pleasantries.
Bagging is cool. I'm talking about this kind of thing: the lady in front of me at the CVS yesterday. She stands there while the cashier rings up and bags all of her items, and only after the total is announced to her does she think to start looking for her wallet.
New Yorkers are friendly and polite too! We're just more
efficient
about it.
[gah - I typed that post over an hour ago and then got disconnected. I didn't expect to find it here at the end of the thread!]
It definitely changed my life. Honestly, it kicked off this phase of self-aware depression* I've been in ever since, so while I don't regret going and had many fine experiences and learned a lot, I'm still not quite at the place where I can be thankful for that piece of it. Ask me again in another 10 years.
* as opposed to the mostly unconscious angst of my teen years, and the deceptively exuberant college years.
Did the Corps help you out with re-entry stress at all?
Years ago, I was on a crusade to get them to let me set up a program for returnees. I was pretty surprised to see that there was so little support on the national level.
When I was talking to the woman today, quite a few of the stories were the hard ones. Usually, I try to filter down to the fun stories, but the reality does pop up sometimes. It took me a while to come to grips with the worst of it, so I hear ya.
Oh and in terms of being addressed as "darling" or "honey". I think very different for a man. Don't have the whole history of facing objectification and the use of those terms to enforce hierarchy. So (assuming not done sarcastically) don't mind women calling me honey or darling even if I'm not their honey or darling. But again, not at all the same thing as when it happens to a woman.
New Yorkers are friendly and polite too! We're just more efficient about it.
No one warned me! It was mostly on the subway, so it was excellent multitasking.
If I go back, I'll know and not look at people like they might be a little unstable.
Meara:
I think that the Riona's prettier, but the Paulina looks like it has more support.
How are Americans more rude? The overfamiliarity?
That, and the annoying bit where we say unpleasant things out loud. I was quite the revelation in my British office. And I thought that I was being reserved ;) I will never forget the look on one of my colleague's faces when one of the guys requested something unreasonable and I said "well, he's just going to have to get over it, because we can't do it". She was flabbergasted at first, then delighted at the phrase "get over it"
This cracks me up because Joe wants to work for Auntie Beeb after he finishes his degree.
I see a lot of "oh, as usual, dear" in the future if this happens
I feel airports should really be broken down into Traveler Types. I
I've seen a few airports with designated security line, with pictures! Problem is that they're never all open, so you're in the line with the family with 4 kids whose youngest refuses to take of her shoes without a tantrum.
Also, I've been in the expert line, and I get two bins - one for my shoes/quart plastic bag/jacket and one for my laptop. About half of the time, the jackass behind me puts stuff in one of the bins. SO IRRITATING. I used to sigh loudly and get another bin, but now I say "EXCUSE ME, I was using that, please remove your stuff"
she was convinced that all midwesterners were the nicest people on Earth.
well, she's kinda right. At least they
appear
to be. Even Southerners will follow up a backhanded compliment with "Bless her heart"
The express lane? That's the one with four people lined up with full grocery carts.
ever since I found out that cashiers aren't allowed to say anything if the customer has over 10 items, I will always speak up, loudly and sweetly "You must have not realized that you are in the express lane, you have WAY more than 10 items. Here, let me move back so that you can get out. Do you need help getting it back into the cart?
I frequently get stuck in the Metro behind a group of tourists trying to figure out the fare card machines.
Yes, and they don't know how to ride escalators. I just bellow out "Standing on the right, walking on the left, please!"
Well, that's a whole 'nother ball of wax. Some places now have signs that they won't serve you unless you have ended your cell phone conversation, which I support.
Amen. I think that the height of rudeness to be on your cellphone while at a checkout counter.
(Cashier looks at strange spice). "What do you use this in?" "Oh I'm trying out a new Indian recipe!" Then at the end, "Good luck with your recipe!"
that makes sense to me. What doesn't make sense is "oh, you're buying milk! The price of milk is going up all the time." If you have a question or interesting comment go for it. Don't talk just to talk. The new house manager at the theatre does that, she drives me nuts. She babbles and natters about whatever. And she will come up to you when you're clearly doing something else (say, reading a book) and just start small talk like "so, do you have any pets?". Ugh.
Some local co-workers were going to New York for a business trip. Knowing I'm a born Easterner, one asked me for advice for dealing with the natives. "Don't make a lot of eye contact," I told her, "it's considered forward." "Oh, that's silly," she laughed. A week later, she came to me, a little shaken: "They yelled at me to stop staring at them! Is that what you meant?" "Pretty much."
