So, this is on-topic, but not pleasant, since when has any talk of marriage regarding me been pleasant.

I sent an e-mail last night.

My mom just responded.

Witness.

Oh P-C. I am so proud and happy that you wrote that letter, and I am so sorry about her response. It's just such world's apart from your perspective and your life. It just sucks so much.

I have never been proposed to, but I did break up with someone I strongly suspect was about to (nice guy, but clearly on a Wife Hunt, and I met the right criteria).

Edited to add: {{{PC}}}

I liked how she threw in that bit about "taking care of his parents," hint hint.

It's just like that sad little tsk my oldest sister kept running into back home when she hit 40 and wasn't married. Multiple graduate degrees, world travel, but she couldn't nail down some random human male, so sad. And when she did find someone, there was the air of "Well, about time."

I don't think there is an answer to this, only coping.

Hil, you are a good person with many valuable skills. Your health will improve. Things will get better. I won't tell you not to worry because that is the opposite of helpful. But I will tell you deserve not to worry and don't need to worry.

As a 41-year-old non-married female, I am very grateful that I have no cultural/parental concerns regarding my status.

Oh P-C. I am so proud and happy that you wrote that letter, and I am so sorry about her response. It's just such world's apart from your perspective and your life. It just sucks so much.

I'm not sure why I ever expect a different response. I am clearly insane, per the colloquial definition.

This is, I think, probably the worst response I've ever gotten. I'm rather appalled, honestly. (Also, for fuck's sake, they paid for college, but the only semester I had to pay for grad school, I took out a loan myself and paid it all back myself, and I bought my fucking car with my own fucking money that I earned at my own fucking job.)

((P-C)) I'm sorry your family can't see how wonderful your life is.

And in non happy marriage talk I'm asking the hivemind -- does anyone know of a really really good divorce attorney in South Carolina. Someone who could definitely help a father get sole custody of his child?

Thanks, Gar.

I've got another interview on Wednesday. It's not anywhere near my top choice, but it's a place where I'm pretty sure I would be OK working for a year or two. I'm just getting really sick of interviews by now. Also, not so much coping well with not knowing where I'm going to be living in August. I like to plan ahead and be able to look at all my options. Right now, it's looking like I'll probably end up with about a week to find an apartment, at about the same time that I'm defending my dissertation.

This is, I think, probably the worst response I've ever gotten. I'm rather appalled, honestly. (Also, for fuck's sake, they paid for college, but the only semester I had to pay for grad school, I took out a loan myself and paid it all back myself, and I bought my fucking car with my own fucking money that I earned at my own fucking job.)

They're clearly obsessing over something that simply isn't in your control to do anything about (since you'd like to choose your own mate). I've gotten to know you pretty well and I really think you're going to meet someone all on your own and have a wonderful relationship. I mean, the power of your awesome chili can't be denied.