My day so far:
Wake up, coffee, internet round-up and check. Go to to start iTouch for cleaning rampage music, is dead. Say bad words, charge.Prepare to clean in monk-like silence.
Awful gingham ex-wife curtains removed from dining room.
Go out, apologize to neighbor's for ex-wife's dog incessantly barking. Explain dog needs to be out while I clean. Neighbor is very nice, offers to bring EWD over to play with son's GIANT Lab puppy. EWD goes over fence, promptly starts trying to hump giant Lab puppy's face. I go inside.
Dining room dusted, lemon oiled, window seat hastily cleaned and decorated with items pilfered from screened in porch room, de-cat boxed, de- cat fooded, de- pethair and de-cat condoed
Dining room swiffered, swept (yes, I have to do it twice, fucking 5 pets, OMGWHY?) mopped.
Dining room chairs brought in, not polished yet.
OMG, I forgot I have to cook a turkey breast too! Check turkey breast -- does not need to be defrosted. Cancel plans for evening, as this means I have to cook the ham tonight.
Put ham out.
Go get cigarettes. It's cold. I'm wearing a short cotton skort.
Get nicotine. Pay in $10.77 worth of change.
Get home, smoke cigarette. Get up, spray overn cleaner in oven, as it was producing large amounts of smoke when I baked a pizza last night (from last time I broiled chicken breasts with shittons of butter.)
Dust and polish almost all furniture in foyer, living room and office, except stuff that will just have to be done again after the de-hairing of the furniture tonight.
Swiffer and sweep living room and office. Mop living room while hollering as cats traipse across wet floor -- "Wait till I'm done cleaning it before you get it dirty!"
Take internet and cigarette break.