(Not an avatar.)

(I mean, as far as I can tell.)

Teppy, I'm glad you went to the ER. I just attended the funeral of my friend's mom who died of a very sudden massive heart attack at age 57.

My DH has searched in vain for what he calls a "fat friendly" doctor because he doesn't like lectures. But he'd happily deal with a lecture if he could get into an appointment on time. The wait times in the office usually drive up his blood pressure.

The medical profession isn't perfect but I think it's important to remember what we each take into the appointments with us. We build relationships with medical personnel. Those relationships can be as fraught as anything.

Andi, I wish your experiences were better. Health and happiness are things which every person deserves. Except maybe Cheney.

I've been extremely lucky. I'm obese but fairly satisfied with my appearance and health. I'm also educated and self-confident in medical settings--so much so that I've had two surgical nurses ask me if I was a nurse prior to surgery.

Drew, I'm glad you and Lisa spoke up. It's important to be able to express how we feel--and if this has been bothering you guys, it's good a good reminder. Rants are sometimes difficult to derail, especially in this case when it's nearly possible for EVERYONE to have had a bad experience with a doctor. Doctors and nurses are human beings often working in inhuman conditions of sleep dep and stress.

As for what the dealio is with my own symptoms, they were probably a combination of side effects from the new antidepressant, my IBS, and stress. Vague but apparently not deadly.

That is FANTASTIC news.

They do want me to get a treadmill stress test soon, though, which is fine by me.

I'm a big fan of these. My father had been having chest pains and the treadmill test (the earlier less elaborate one having missed things) had him sent to the hospital toot sweet and bypassed before he had The Big One.

His five brothers (who had also passed whatever less elaborate test) then treadmilled ASAP and two of them had bypasses before they even had The Little Ones.

Their mother's brother and father had both gone from vigorous to dead in their early fifties because of their hearts. That test and the subsequent bypass has kept a good chunk of my family alive and I delight at watching them turn into cranky old men.

These are hearts, yo. Don't play.

I'm so glad you're going to this level of monitoring, Teppeh. It will be nice to have that much more assurance that your heart is good and strong.

Oh how far we've come...Teppy, I saw this incredibly NSFW typeface link and thought of you.

Can I get some -ma tomorrow morning about 8 AM board time for my wisdom teeth removal?

I am haterating on US Airways right now. Flight delayed an hour because NO CREW!!!

My father had been having chest pains and the treadmill test (the earlier less elaborate one having missed things) had him sent to the hospital toot sweet and bypassed before he had The Big One.

I still worry that I might have blockage in an artery, which today's tests wouldn't have shown. But it ruled out an immediate heart attack, and the treadmill test should rule out (I hope) any blockage.

Oh how far we've come...Teppy, I saw this incredibly NSFW typeface link and thought of you.

Because I'm all about the fonts, right? (Winky emoticon.)

t edit I like "Bound Typeface Safety."

One of CNN's headlines right now is "Cheney survives 5 brushes with death."

It's like they're rubbing it in. I try hard not to wish bad things on people, but Dick Cheney tests my resolve.

Ah, Drew. I know I keep saying sorry, but I'm sorry to have made it worse for you as you are missing your dad. The crappy thing is, I know there are no words that can really make up for that.

My screaming rant got me heaps of validation. Y'all really have helped me step back a bit from that edge. I'm putting some effort into squashing the feeling that I don't deserve it.

Squashing leaves it there to grow back later when your defenses are down.

Look it square in the eye. Tell it you now have a level of stability of affection and respect in your life that you didn't get to grow up with.

In that context "you don't deserve it" was logical for you to think. It was incorrect, but it was a reasonable conclusion for you to reach.

It is not anymore. You now have people in your life who not only say they love you and that you are beautiful, they mean it and will continue to say it.

So look that old lie in the face and say good bye. Wish it well even, it must be sad to be a lie. Give it a smooch on the cheek and set it free.