What's this about me not being a hugger? I hug. Just on my terms.

Oh my! Noah got the most amazing set of tree blocks from my former student who occasionally babysits for him. Glamcookie, when you are ready for a sitter, I have one for you. I mean, yeah, sure have the kids first and all. But when you are ready!

Wolf the Contentious

If I ever need a handle for an LJ sock-puppet, I think I'll go with that.

I kind of like hugging people I know and like, but I'm total crap at reading people, so I don't really know when they want to be hugged. So I generally let them initiate it or not.

Wallybee and I rewatched the West Wing tonight, the last ep of Season 1. It includes the following exchange:

Leo: What are you doing?!
Josh: I... thought you wanted to hug me.
Leo: Boy, did you read that wrong.

Theo's interview went well -- it turns out Tom W.'s direct report is the manager (!!!), so I'm hopeful of a home court advantage, but there are still a number of other interviews scheduled, et cetera... so I'll hold onto some of that job-ma for now!

Has anyone else seen the odd CBS Cares TV spot where the dude advocates doing "something special for your woman this holiday season" and then says, "Schedule her pap smear."

Hon, if you're reading this? PLEASE DO NOT SCHEDULE MY PAP SMEAR. KTHXBYE.

I hug my co-workers occasionally when we're out in social situations, and I hug ex-coworkers when they stop by to visit. But current co-workers while in the office = NO.

Theo's interview went well -- it turns out Tom W.'s direct report is the manager (!!!), so I'm hopeful of a home court advantage

That is too cool!

Fingers crossed!!

I love Josh and Leo.

Yay! I'll keep sending the job~ma.

I'm a huggy hugger. I've hugged employees, vendors, and customers. I'm pretty sure I know which ones are good with that. There are a number of kiss on the cheek and kiss on both cheeks types among my business acquaintances too. I just follow their lead as I am ok with all of it.

I would also be more than twice as old as the previous coop/intern.

Hon, if you're reading this? PLEASE DO NOT SCHEDULE MY PAP SMEAR. KTHXBYE.

I suppose one might be grateful that they said "schedule" and not "perform".

Oh lord, was I traumatized when I got hugged by the CEO at the end of her holiday party last year.

I get traumatised just watching coworkers hug each other.

Yeah, hugging at work is not on. A world of no.

Big!Boss and Wife hug us once a year, at the end of the holiday party. I'm fairly uncomfortable with that.

You hug-a-phobes have got all kinds of personal space issues.

Oh hells yes. It is a constant joke in my department how I involuntarily back away in my chair until I hit a wall. In my own office. It's maybe 10X10. Can't handle anyone beyond half of that before I hit a wall. My bubble, she is huge.

I think I've posted this before, but I'ma post it again since it's an ongoing conundrum for me.

In the kinky community, there's actually a "rule" of Don't Touch People Without Permission. And in the various books/websites that address this, they often say things like, "Even hugging someone."

Theoretically, most kinky people should know that.

In practice, kinky people are touchy-feely as HELL, and while someone might not run up and try to participate in a spanking/whatever, that same someone has no problem in a less-beaty, more-social situation of coming up behind women and rubbing their shoulders, or petting clothes that look fuzzy (like velvet; the problem being that the clothes are ON A HUMAN who might not want to be petted unannounced [or at all]).

I solve that problem by stepping away, out of reach.

An even stickier problem is all the goddamn hugs. I have boundary issues, and I'm just not comfortable hugging every damn person at a dinner/party/whatever. And choosing to not hug should be my goddamn prerogative. I shouldn't be forced to step back to evade a hug.

(I know this sounds ungracious; it's not that I don't like the people themselves, because I'm generally happy to see [most of] them. I just don't want to hug them.)

The problem is people who insist on a hug, who physically follow my stepping back in order to hug me, and/or people who are miffed -- MIFFED, I SAY -- that I wouldn't hug them. And then there's the issue that there are a few people I'm happy to hug, but the Ruthless Huggers seem to think that if I hug one person, I must be fair game to hug everyone, which is simply not true.

I feel like I should print cards and hand them out explaining that my boundaries are just that -- MINE -- and while I'm happy to see them, part of my boundaries is choosing who I hug, damn it.

But I shouldn't HAVE to explain it at all.