Definitely jimmies.

A former super once told me about a Korean War Bride who had been in her rent-controlled apartment in my building for 50 years, and was paying something like $150/month. The husband had died years earlier. (FTR, my rent in that building was $1600/month.)

My upstairs neighbor on 4th Ave in Brooklyn lived sixty years in that building and was paying about $100/month for a whole floor of a brownstone (4 rooms and a kitchen). I was paying $900, and then $1350 after the owners sold it.

Of course, that's not quite as bad as the woman with the apartment in the swank West Village ($80 a month) who rented it out each summer for $600 thereby paying for her to go to Greece for two months.

Of course, that's not quite as bad as the woman with the apartment in the swank West Village ($80 a month) who rented it out each summer for $600 thereby paying for her to go to Greece for two months.

That's brilliant.

"Silence! I am composing a poem to the saga of my divine wind!"

Oh Snootch. You so awesome.

People who can't make firm plans kill me. If I had known the ultimate plan for tonight was going to be right after work, I would have worn different clothes! Meh, it's not like I'm trying to impress anyone.

That's brilliant.

I forgot the best part. She makes you think you are getting a deal because she needs a catsitter and that's why it's only $600. I only found out her real rent because I saw a rent slip.

Those of you who know me will know that I don't consider anything involving me and a cat a deal, but at the time I was sharing a place with a woman I called Psycho Maria, and even cats were starting to look good.

Oh, also -- sprinkles. (Or, if you will, kprinkles.)

When I went to college in Milwaukee, I first encountered "bubbler" for "drinking and/or water fountain." I remember once asking a guard at a bank where the water fountain was at, and he gave me a funny look and then told me it was outside in front of the building. I glanced out the window, realized he was talking about the decorative fountain, and then corrected my question to ask for the bubbler instead, which was around the corner down the hall.

I thought it was hilarious that he couldn't translate my request and obviously thought I was insane.

OK, wait -- my coworker just directed me to the (ridiculous) comments on that ad, and now I have a question: Do the rest of you people not "bang a u-ey"?

Does that mean doing a u-turn on the road? I've never used the word "bang" in that context.