cereal, because I ran away from my desk for an hour+ and forgot to send my previous message.

GOD, Steph. I don't know- it might be worth it to be known as the office bitch if people stopped doing it. Or at least stopped exposing it to you. I say call them on it. Easier said than done, I know. But otherwise... you're kind of passively accepting that this is OK.

Sophia, how do people respond when you say that? Because I'm afraid that if someone tells me "It's JUST a joke!" or "Don't be so sensitive!" that I will lose my shit.

You could just try sticking with "I don't find it funny."

Rather than what I would be tempted to do, which is to explain that "it's just a joke" is the lamest excuse in the history of the world.

Sophia, how do people respond when you say that? Because I'm afraid that if someone tells me "It's JUST a joke!" or "Don't be so sensitive!" that I will lose my shit.

I have been told it is just a joke, and I just sort of look at them and walk away-- you can't really make someone find a joke funny. No one has asked me to be less sensitive, because I am sort of known as being epically sensitive. I also don't get into the fact that I think THEY are being offensive-- just sort of act surprised and confused and hope they get it. I don't have the courage yet to be forceful-- I just sort of say it and walk away.

But otherwise... you're kind of passively accepting that this is OK.

I know. The problem is that Big!Boss's daughter (the instigator of this fuckwittery) is actually considered our superior, not a work peer, despite the fact that she's friendly and buddy-buddy. When push comes to shove, we were told that we may not question the decisions she makes about office procedure (changing our office hours, etc.) and that she's our "boss." I guess in an Office Manager type way.

Calling out a work peer is one thing, but calling out a superior is entirely different. Not morally, of course, but in terms of whether I want to keep my job.

Teppy, you should definitely say something. It's harrasment whether it is aimed at you or not.

Kristin, I hope you're feeling better today.

I have a panic attack hangover and I have to deal with the sexist plumber today. Don't wanna.

Steph, it strikes me as something that isn't funny, but then I have much the same sensitivity on the issue. And to them it is just a joke - it's not something that they're going to see. I've found that people who are in this "joke" and getting competitive - trying to outdo each other - they're even less sensitive.

I don't suppose you could say you've given up being mean for Lent.

Steph, I know I'd be really tempted to play dumb and tell them I didn't understand the joke and make them explain it (and keep insisting I didn't get it, and make them keep trying to explain what the funny part way). Because I'd hope that would be torture for them.

ION, I know that I've mentioned we have a job we want to post, but can't because official approval hasn't come down, etc. This morning our admin person called the provost's office and they said the paperwork had gone to HR, so she emailed the HR person, who has now emailed back,

"I just spoke to [blankity-blank-blank] in the Provost’s office and she communicated to me that the approval is still pending, and of course, I cannot move forward until I have approval. I was also advised that you were informed this morning via telephone by the Provost’s office that it had not yet been approved. The paperwork has not been lost and as soon as I am able to initiate recruiting activity I will be sure to contact all parties involved."

Woof! She sounds mad.

In addition, one of our first year Legal Research & Writing profs can't go teach abroad next month because of a conflict, and came down to ask if the other Reference person could do it. I'm *pissed* because a) I'm his supervisor and she didn't come through me, b) her dept has 6 other people in it all teaching this subject that could easily cover, what the hell is she trying to poach from my department for? (She says her colleagues can't go because they have teaching commitments. We apparently, have no commitments.)

What a bunch of fuckers, Steph. I'm sorry you're having to deal with teh insensitive stupid. What a shitty situation.

IcompletelyON, how long is it acceptable to hang out at a restaurant table after eating? I dropped DW's car off in Santa Monica and just finished having b'fast (a yummy b'fast at a low-rent little diner). A co-worker is giving me a lift to the office, but isn't picking me up until 10 (it's now 9). Can I hang here that long? There are empty tables...

ETA: Just ordered a juice.

but OBVIOUSLY fat people deserve shame and scorn because they can't control themselves and just gorge themselves all day long while sitting on the couch watching soap operas.

Damn those belly enlarging soaps! I knew there was a reason, but I don't wanna give them up.

Steph, I know I'd be really tempted to play dumb and tell them I didn't understand the joke and make them explain it (and keep insisting I didn't get it, and make them keep trying to explain what the funny part way). Because I'd hope that would be torture for them.

I always love a Sparky solution. I'm sorry you have to deal with that crap, Steph.

Skipped many hundreds of posts, just busy busy. {{}}s to all.

GC, if there are empty tables I wouldn't worry about it.

fruit smoothy:

and I have to deal with the sexist plumber today. Don't wanna.

I read that as sexiest plumber and wondered why that was a bad thing.