I am having a hard time celebrating marriage when it's denied to so many people for no goddamn good reason except fear and hatred.

Sigh. Yeah, I hear this, and I felt it a little bit this morning too...but, at the same time, I need to be happy about getting married. I'm trying to keep the two separate. For me, it's a bit like keeping my own pain about infertility away from my happiness for my friends' pregnancies. I can be angry as hell about the inequities and fight like hell for marriage equality without despising my own ceremony. I think that I'm able to do this because the ceremony for me is about affirming the love and commitment between us more than it is about the legality of it--despite the fact that I completely, 100% agree that the legality is a right every person should have and that we must keep fighting for. If I had fallen in love with a woman instead of ND, I believe I would still be getting married in January.

Does that make any sense?

It makes plenty of sense, Pix.

Yeah, I hear this, and I felt it a little bit this morning too...but, at the same time, I need to be happy about getting married.

I agree- I'm just having a bad day today.

I am having a hard time celebrating marriage when it's denied to so many people for no goddamn good reason except fear and hatred.

Sigh. Yeah, I hear this, and I felt it a little bit this morning too...but, at the same time, I need to be happy about getting married.

As someone who is determinedly calling my civil partnership a 'wedding', and determinedly celebrating one whether it is or isn't (fully) legally such, I'm sure there aren't any LGBT people who would actually deny someone else the happiness of marriage just because they're fighting to be allowed the same happiness. (That was a convoluted sentence, but it's a little difficult to express. But important nonetheless.)

Or, put another way - there wouldn't be so many LGBT people fighting for marriage rights if it weren't something worth celebrating!

If I had fallen in love with a woman instead of ND, I believe I would still be getting married in January.

Yes. I think that's exactly it.

(Have to pay for other things, including therapy - but I haven't had time for that in a while...!)

Well, most of that was actually therapy (group weekly, individual biweekly, and med consult once monthly with psych). Only $45 or so was crazy meds. I guess it's one of the best investments I can make, but seeing it in black and white that way was a shocker. Thankfully I paid off my car the month before I started group.

And wow that walker looks cool but wow is it spendy! Had no idea they cost that much, and it's also a bit ridiculous you had to wait that long.

GC, WTF. It's a messed up world when weight obsession begins pre-natally.

Vibes and -ma to everyone that needs them, and congratulations to the newly married Buffistas!

Had no idea they cost that much, and it's also a bit ridiculous you had to wait that long.

Heh. That's nothing. I could have kept pestering different parts of the NHS for funding, but it would have taken up to another six months of waiting lists and re-assessments. Hence, I'm buying it myself. (Yeah, mobility equipment is expensive. Wheelchairs are even worse!)

Huh - sorry to hear you had to spend so much on therapy. It's just so expensive, for something that's really essential for many people. I used to have it only every other week, to make it cheaper.

I used to have it only every other week, to make it cheaper.

Group is every week, I have no choice about that (it's DBT). Well, I could choose not to be in it, but it's really helpful. And individual therapy is required to be in DBT, plus I *lurve* my therapist.

who needs Valentine's Day anyway?

I have a feeling that the Buffista version of this, around Halloween, involves actual hearts.

I feel exactly like kristin does about being able to get married when gay people cannot. Exactly.

I feel your financial pain, smonster. We are shelling out a ton of money to our therapist (2x/week for DH and once/month for both together) and it's absolutely worth every penny, but I didn't budget for it before upping the appointments and only 3/4 of the fee counts toward our deductible, so those payments are coming out of our already pretty depleted savings. It makes me nervous not having the cushion, but not as nervous as not having the therapy.

But, now that I know the score I should be able to adjust the budget.