I guess the more I speak up, the more they'll get used to it?

Sunil, you are *awesome.* I mean that. The conversation was calm, you let your mom know that *you* know that they want the best for you, you asserted your boundaries, and it ended well.

Right ON.

If I haven't found someone by next July or August, they are going to India in December, and they are taking me, and I will be married there.

What? Are they going to kidnap you?

Possibly. They could hire ninjas. Perhaps they already have. I should do a sweep of the attic.

Happy birthday, Ginger!

Laura, God, I'm sorry you have to go through this. {{}}

And hugz, relax and sleep~ma to the Zmayhems as well.

omnis, I'm OK. I'm not stressing out about every little thing, and certainly don't handle every little problem as if it's a crisis. I was just blowing off some steam. But I still love you and appreciate the worry.

Nothing about my sis, but whatever that was, seems like will hear about it in the news. She was very distress. I'm wondering what the story was.

I learned today from my Great Aunt that my family has a lot of female doctors and nurses in it (including the first female physicians in England! ... who weren't allowed to see any male "naughty parts" during their training). What fascinated me about it is that said first doctors finished their studies in 1914 - just in time to WW1. That, with knowing that my mom did her first year in nursing school in 1973 (Yom Kippur war), and that my sister wants to study medicine, made me worry for a minute, thinking into what she'll have to dive in.

Now, off to finish reading a paper and see Ryan pics!

P-C, what Steph said. With sparkles on it.

(Sorry if my post came in the middle, it took me ages to type it...)

It isn't like I don't know where he is, about 4 blocks away. I have not specifically said, "you must come home this instant." The reason he is in trouble was the not talking to me about it before the fact. It's tough. He'll be 18 in January. We had a chat exchange yesterday morning. His phone is in the possession of the school office at the moment.

Part of my internal conflict is that I was already out of the house by about his age, living with my boyfriend (DH#1) shortly before I turned 18. I had dropped out of high school, had my GED, and was in business school. DH was also out of the house before he turned 18. My lifestyle at his age was far wilder. Way the hell wilder.

He isn't hanging with a bad group. I know the kids. The difference is that they are in college and he is in HS. He stayed the last couple nights at his friend's mom's house because he is home for the weekend from FSU. If I had any reason to believe he was up to anything outrageous I would have gone and picked him up.

It is impossible to know what the right thing to do is, but since I feel he is in a safe situation I'm not going maniac on him. Just yanking some privileges when he gets home. That will happen shortly when the friend heads back to FSU. Best guess is after the Dolphins finish kicking ass. I'd bet heavily they are watching the game with a half dozen other teens.

meara! Yes, I know you are heading this way. Tues - Tues. Hmmmm. I have to go to in-laws for Turkey day itself, but pretty free otherwise. Will send e shortly to coordinate a plan.

Laura, if you or Dad had disappeared off the radar without direct contact for more than 48 hours, I'm pretty sure he'd be worried and upset. Keeping the people who love you informed of your whereabouts and plans isn't wearing a leash or a lo-jack, it's adult behavior. That's nothing less than you're entitled to.

And my long post was xposty with Sunil. Dude, you are making progress. Listening to your mother and ending the conversation without yelling or tears is big. Also, we won't let them kidnap you. Apparently I have a different parenting style, but I do value the communication I have with the boys and hope that by working with them they might listen to me about important things, or at least value my opinion.

Absolutely, Beverly. It is only because I knew where he was and could have called one of the other kids or stopped at the house where he was any time that I wasn't crazed. Still I made it quite clear yesterday that it was completely unacceptable for him to take off that way and that there would be consequences.

Probably a bit late for me to start smacking him up side the head, and I'd have to get a ladder. DH would handle the whole thing differently, but after years of spirited debate he defers to me in this situation.

My lifestyle at his age was far wilder. Way the hell wilder.

::pulls up chair for Laura's lovely stories of sex, drugs and the seventies::

P-C, it weirdly sounds like a cult deprogramming the way they talk about it. Except they're trying to break you from the evil mind control of, uh...autonomy and singlehood.