Okay, I could probably handle that. It's funny that I'd be more worried about the itch than the needles or pain, but there you have it.

I don't own a blow dryer, though.

I'm saying all this like I have any serious plans, which I don't. But still, good to know.

Yay, anime toaster for JZ.

Yep, dinner includes drinks.

What if you're with a large group, and one side of the table orders quite extravagantly, including a couple bottles of wine, and the other side of the table orders frugally, and then it is decided that the bill should just be split equally? Is that a valid reason to be annoyed or another instance of "just suck it up"? Hasn't the frugal side effectively been asked to subsidize the extravagant side? That's lame.

No, that's worth speaking up about.

In a large group you can try suggesting that that you split the bar and food bills according to who consumed, but if that is not a popular suggestion, you suck it up but are free to feel annoyed on the inside.

I always throw in more than I think I owe in case someone else is a bad tipper. Often when my family goes out to dinner we all throw in cash and nobody will take any back. I think we make waiters very happy.

PC, my personal experience has always been vastly different than that: 1) either the whole group is very similar (all extravagant or all frugal), or 2) the frugal sorts just speak up and say, "We need to split out our portion of the bill, we're on a budget" - and I've never run into resistance about that. (Frequently, I'm the one on the budget, more's the pity - I'd rather be extravagant, since that's the way my inner playa rolls.)

What if you're with a large group, and one side of the table orders quite extravagantly, including a couple bottles of wine, and the other side of the table orders frugally, and then it is decided that the bill should just be split equally?

That's way, way different than one person offering to treat. That is indeed lame, and it's fair for the frugal folks to speak up, point out the difference, and ask to split the bill according to, you know, what each person actually ordered. And the nonfrugals ought to be good and embarrassed.

eta: There was actually a whole Friends episode about this very thing, back in the beginning when Rachel was serving at the coffeehouse, Monica was low on the restaurant totem pole, and Joey wasn't working at all but the others never noticed them gnawing on breadsticks and splitting one side salad.

it is decided that the bill should just be split equally? Is that a valid reason to be annoyed or another instance of "just suck it up"? Hasn't the frugal side effectively been asked to subsidize the extravagant side? That's lame.

Then you are responsible for speaking up and saying "I don't think that we all ordered equally, especially those who didn't drink wine" In that case, you might suggest that the wine be subtracted out and the food bill be split amongst all and the wine amongst those who drank. Or you can man up and say "I prefer to pay for what I ordered" and pay your share and let the rest of the table deal with the remainder.

Yeah, if one person offers to treat the other, then that means paying for everything, as long as the person doesn't order something completely ridiculously expensive. In a group, the group decides whether to split it evenly or have each person pay their share. If the same group goes out pretty often and it's always certain people ordering expensive stuff other other people not, then the group should discuss it.

Right, but at that point you also have to be willing to be the math person.

I solve this problem by mostly going out to eat with my accountant firm owning buddy, who always divvys up any checks in question because he can do it in his brane in about ten seconds. Of course, he's also the wealthiest person I hang out with, so he often solves the problem of having to divvy up by paying himself.

It's actually an issue for us on the other side of things, because we often call up donors and ask them out to eat when we're in their town. We want to check in with them, and give them extra info about what's going on with us. But then they nearly always pay for us, which is not the point! We are happy to pay for them, but they somehow feel that if they are donating money to us but accept us paying for dinner, they are wasting someone else's money.

But by the time it gets to dinner, it's been through our paycheck and payroll taxes and budgeting and everything! It's just us trying to be nice and say thank you!

So we effectively invite ourselves to be taken out to eat sort of perpetually. It's an etiquette problem.