For me, 2008 has been *a year*. I can't even really categorize all that has happened into good/bad.

• Got a new job within my company which included a move to Denver in the summer.

• Told DH that I wanted a divorce.

• DH decided he would move to Colorado also to stay near his son.

• Went on a massive cleaning spree, prepping the house to go up for sale and prepping for a move to Denver.

• House went on the market in May.

• K-Bug and I looked at a few colleges and she chose Sonoma State.

• Living in the same house but separate from STBX was much easier than expected. We continue to be amicable, though when I spend much time with him now, it underlines why the break was so necessary and long overdue.

• K-Bug graduated from High School.

• June 30th was the official move date, CJ and I flew to Colorado while mom drove with a friend of hers. K-Bug flew out later after a Senior Trip to Disneyland.

• CJ started Karate and after a couple of months got me to join also. We are both Orange belts now.

• CJ started a new school and ADHD meds. He had done fantastic so far, academically, though he is still struggling with making good friends.

• K-Bug returned the California and started College on her own. She earned great grades her first semester and has gotten very involved in the Residential Life leadership group and hopes to be a CSA (like a Resident Assistant) next year.

• Adjusting to my new job has involved a steep learning curve, but I am loving the work and the people so much better than my old job.

• We dropped the price on the house several times.

• Mom has handled the move pretty well and her health has held pretty steady. She seems to enjoy the new location, though some days are rougher than others.

• I left my van with K-Bug, so have been sharing a car with my mom. Never thought I'd be ok with not having my own wheels, but it has worked out fine so far.

• My first review for my new job was extremely complimentary. Unfortunately, with the economy the way it is, the accompanying raise was not so fantastic - but I have a job I enjoy, so that is worth a ton.

• Finally got a workable offer on the house, just before Christmas only to run into some major bumps the day before New Years. Still waiting to see how that plays out.

Basically my life flipped upside down. I feel like I'm still missing some of the milestones, there has just been so much. I feel like I'm in a much better place mentally though, financially, not quite so much.

Here is to 2009 bringing closure to those outstanding issues - the house, the divorce, the financial mess... Maybe that is too much to hope for, but sometimes you have to wish big.

We want the pictures too!

well, if you want to see a picture she took of Ellie, it is here: [link]

(I know she has the right to use the picture of Ellie, but it's just a bit...galling...that she would use a picture of my daughter but not send me the pictures I've paid her for.)

eta: context

I feel a bit bad saying this (or at least insensitive) but 2008 was a pretty good year for me.

Hey! Nobody's got to apologize for good stuff. Frisco's arrival is very very good news indeed.

The two most disappointing elements of 2008 for me were related to finances and writing. Whereas 2007 was my best year for publishing ever, with the book turned in, two articles for Oxford American and a new book project in the works.

In 2008, the book came out (to favorable reviews, though I've gotten a few dings) and I promoted it, but that was really the tail end of a two year process. My new book project fell apart when the publisher had financial difficulties. I did do a big, lucrative liner notes job back in February but that seems like a million years ago.

I had a ton of fun doing my book reading in SF, and even more fun doing the Tom Waits bus tour and reading in LA (with many Buffistas to see down there).

But ultimately what seemed possible in 2007 - being able to write part-time and temp the rest of the time - didn't work. I had the longest drought in temp work I've ever had, and my book project died. That lead to some real financial strain.

I'll let JZ ring in for her own year, but she had two job changes this year after 15 years of stability so that was a lot of upheaval. But we've been collaborating this year on a writing project and that's been both a real pleasure and a happy new dynamic in our (almost) five year marriage.

We all feel extraordinarily lucky to have Matilda in our lives. Toddlers are hard work, but she's really a joy giving kid.

Emmett's had both a great year and a tough one. He had about as much success as an 11 y.o. can have on a baseball field. Our regular season team, the Cubs, won the Albany Little League title and went on to become the first Majors level team from our league to win the District Tournament of Champions. (All the sweeter for beating our arch-rivals Alameda.)

Then Emmett's all-star team defended their District title, went on to win Section, and finally became the first Albany team ever to win Division, which is the Northern California State Championship. Emmett was an absolute rock for his team, playing stellar catcher for 69 out the 72 innings played, and had many huge, clutch hits, including the game winner in the come from behind Section championship win.

But it's been a tough year at school. He's been wrestling with some pre-adolescnent angst, missing socializing with his friends, retreating a bit socially, unhappy with his homework load and has a difficult relationship with his teacher. He's just been sad a lot this fall and winter and it's hard to see. But in some ways our relationship is closer for all that. Putting him to bed at night, has evolved from singing lullabies to him as I walked him up and down the hallway, to sitting on his bed and talking to him about life and school and getting through the sad times.

Also, in the last week I've been reading to him before bedtime. We're currently on a really filthy, funny baseball book and that's been fun. He also had a really, really good Christmas.

I've had a lot of close friends deal with major, life-threatening health issues in the last year. Emmett's godmother dealt with breast cancer. My best man has polycystic kidney disease and is getting a transplant this week. So I am more conscious than ever that good health is the greatest good fortune. I don't take it for granted.

Ultimately, I feel very lucky - even after the crappiest, rainiest commute - when I turn the lock on the door and hear Matilda pipe out, "Hi-lo, DaddyEmmett!" and have her little self pelt into us. Then walk down the hall to a warm living room and kiss my good, kind, lovely wife. There are other things we could want or wish for, but this life is so rooted and good.

I'm still not quite ready to talk about 2008. Or really, I'm as ready as I'll ever be, but I don't have time right now as I have a very full day ahead of me.

For now I'll say that I'm somewhere between Drew and Kristin -- there were quite a few non-bad things that happened to me this year, but everything else that happened to me and those I love has been agonizing. So much so that I cannot so easily say this was not a bad year for me.

So much so that I cannot so easily say this was not a bad year for me.

Here, let me say it for you. Your year sucked donkey balls.

Um, was that unduly harsh? I meant it as funny-stuffy. Like, you know, Wesley on Buffy, before he was cool on Angel. Sorry.

Oh, no! I wasn't wowing your comments, so much as the whole conversation, which just epitomizes Buffistas (or Buffistae, as the case may be).

Oh good. You wowed, and disappeared. I worried, for I don't like to offend unintentionally.

My Seekrit Santa rocks 11 ways from Sunday. Truly - I have a wonderfully creative always-good calendar made of gorgeous blocks with months and dates and days painted on each side, a lovely card that made me chuckle, and a box that is marked 'part 1 of 11.' I may just hang out by the mailbox more.

Thank you Kat! You are made of awesome.

More to come...

Oh good. You wowed, and disappeared. I worried, for I don't like to offend unintentionally.

I'm so far on b.org that I just read a few threads that don't post very often, so I'm not here every day (sigh, I miss it!). I'm sorry for leaving you hanging!

I may just hang out by the mailbox more.

It is part one of 11. But, you have a couple of weeks until the next installment, so you can hang around the mailbox less. Then about four weeks until installment 3.

I'm stretching Christmas out this year.

Also, thank you for the beautiful notepad and the apt magnet that came along with my soap. Secret Santa, you rock!