Happy New Year all. I have a meandering post below. I may post more coherently later, at a time more conducive to coherence than 12:20 am.

Before I get into me, though, I want to comment to bonny: I had no idea you were having such an issue with depression in 2008. Meeting you last year (oops, year before last, now) was very special for me, and I'm sorry that I wasn't able to plan early enough for us to connect in person on recent trip East. You are kind and smart and perceptive and witty and helpful and interesting and patient and thoroughly good company. You are a very special person and you make this world a better place by being in it. Remember this. Please.

Over the last year, I've moved away from b.org, although I keep up with many of you through LJ, Facebook, and even Twitter. It's hard. I can't keep up here, at least not with Natter or Bitches, but Buffistas remains the online home of my heart. When I've needed medical advice, or reassurance that I wasn't crazy, or company when I was, you have been here. Buffistas are the only online people I've met in person, the only ones I've really invested in.

Now, LJ seems easier for me to keep up with, and even that has fallen by the wayside, pushed to the side by my current addictions to Twitter and Second Life, two communities that I've steadfastly decried as stoopid up until I fell madly in love with them a few months ago and a few weeks ago, respectively. I'm not sure that love is healthy, though, at least with Second Life, which is currently taking nearly as much time as my real one. In fact, my one definite resolution is that, after today, I will dial back my time in Second Life pretty dramatically, and will cut it out altogether if that proves too difficult. I've even enlisted a local friend to keep me honest in this.

Anyway, this has moved away from my point, which is that you mean a lot to me, even when I don't make it past Press, COMM, and, well, G&GR. Thank you.

Goodness, I hope sleepy posting isn't as bad as drunken posting.

2008 was a year, much like many others for me. The only major thing that happened to me is I turned 40, and that wasn't really a big deal.

Still, 2009? I'd like fewer friends dying/getting seriously ill, being unemployed and more happy things.

2008 started off with a trip to the hospital because of viral bronchitis. It ended with four straight months of really weird girly squik, getting really anemic and freaked out, and lots of tests and still more hospital.

Friends kept jobs, lost them, prayed for loved ones, went through a lot of crap, and I hope I was able to be there for them as much as they needed, and not too much.

Yes, today I am eating black-eyed peas just in case. I forgot the last two years.

In the interim ...

The good (in no order whatsoever):

• we finally sold our house and no longer carried two mortgages. there was buffista~ma at work here.

• my daughter thinks she helped win the election because I let her push the 'vote' button for me.

• Dr. Horrible made my summer viewing & singing awesome

• travelswithchild.org became a group project, and I was able to work with really talented writers ... including Jessica, Cashmere, Stephanie and of course my co-troublemaker Raq. I love what we've been able to do here as far as putting up stuff that is funny/helps other parents, and I hope that more buffistas feel like writing pieces in the new year.

• I finally, finally, finally resigned from Emo Craxy Nonprofit after 10 years. I do love them, but it was time to move on.

• Some career possibilities on the horizon are really freaking good. They will happen. I know they will.

• DH made it through round 2 of corporate belt tightening; I credit the power of buffista~ma.

• sprog & DH (always)

• seeing Sparky & Sparky DH and Sass much more than I thought moving would allow; many dinners & firefly watchings with d; dinner and walking around Cork with Jars & DH; surprise last-minute Thanksgiving at casa del Raq.

• Iris & Mallory meetups from DC to Philly.

• meeting great neighbors here. Seeing our Baltimore friends nearly every month.

• learning new games. Buffistas and the new game thread, tyvm.

The Bad:

• ongoing silliness with some family.

• loss of some friends because they don't see us enough since we moved.

• discovering sprog's latex allergy the hard way.

• did we really need a 6-month run-up to corporate layoff round #2? Am praying that this is not an annual event.

• not being able to find a doctor that could see me without a 3-month wait when things started to go loony; finding a doctor but then having things go loonier still. Tests. Worries. Having to call the late-night Doc while staying at a friend's house to see if I should go to the ER. More tests. Being really ill without being able to explain why; feeling completely disowned by my body for four months. Finding out that 'this sometimes happens' and no one knows why.

the Under-the-wire, don't rush or anything 2008, good:

• the weird body stuff seems to be responding finally to hormones, thank dog. And 2008 managed to save itself in the end with an all-clear, nothing-to-see-here biopsy. I will give 2008 a lot of thanks for that.

• * as always, the board - even when I couldn't keep up in natter - is a very important part of my life. Thank you all for your honesty, your insights, and for bringing the very funny, cute, ugly, bad, inane, and awesome to light every day.

2009, I have a lot of hope for you - please look after my friends and family, the people soon to be in charge, and the planet in general. Here's hoping things are looking up.

As promised, 2008 in review:

Started out the year with a job I was truly enjoying. I learned all sorts of new computer skills, there was lots of variety to the work to keep me interested, came through in the pinch and pleased the people I worked for tremendously. In all, it was as close to my dream job as I could get. Unfortunately, it was a contract and it ended in August. Since then, the job search has been relatively unproductive. The employers I've contacted have been either a) uninterested or b) been interested, but have no current openings. I have hopes that things will pick up a little in the New Year. Between unemployment and savings, I'm still financially viable and I refuse to worry about what may or may not happen in the job market over the next few months. The job is there, either I will find it or it will find me when the time is right.

I had a very emotional "going-off-the-railings" toward the end of the year. One of my medications was switched over to a generic version and it seemed my body didn't absorb it properly. After some few rollercoaster weeks, the med was switched back and after a month back on the name-brand med I'm pleased to say I'm back on an even keel. My shrink is happy enough with my response to it that he's talking about handing me back over to my PCP, so I don't have to pay the outrageous bills. (My current healthcare provider doesn't cover mental health care. Asshats.) The silver lining from the entire ordeal was being offered a trip out to Denver for a wonderful visit with Nicole, her DF and Suzi. Very, very good for what ails you. 2008 was a wonderful reaffirmation that the friends I've made online have been a constant source of joy and strength for me.

My family continues to do well. My father is 85 and still going. He feels he's falling apart, but he still goes to the YMCA three times a week and that's a lot more than even I do! My brother got a promotion at work. The daughter is working hard at getting promoted at work and has been in a good relationship for the past year. One that I think is the healthiest she's had so far. The son and daughter-in-law continue to struggle along on SS. Jesse works part-time to supplement it. Jina is scheduled to start school in January, to complete an administrative assistant course at a local technical college. They moved to a new apartment with a much nicer roommate (one who won't steal from them.) I am content that everyone in my family are in a good place at the end of the year and I have hope that 2009 will bring them more good things.

To sum up: good, bad, indifferent, it was never anything that couldn't be handled and it was always an opportunity to learn and grow. Plus, it was just plain fun in most places!

Nicole is a meanie who is mean.

Why would Nicole say that about herself?

I suspect rather a stealth Perkins.

So stealth it was Suzi, who is a poopyhead.

eta: that was Perkins. Nicole wouldn't say poopyhead.

Pants on fire

Before I get into me, though, I want to comment to bonny:

Aw, thanks Lib. What a lovely hug. Nice to see you around here and great blessings to you in the new year.

I tried to come up with a list for 2008 with a good side, but I have concluded that it is best to kick it to the curb and call it history.

2009, I got a lot of hope for ya. We get to have a president who doesn't cause me shame and horror. I know that President Obama will have some serious challenges, but he has convinced me that he is up to the task. The political world has always been important to me, but the last eight years took more of a toll on me than I should have allowed. Thank you to all those that contributed to the change in leadership by voting and encouraging others to vote. Having hope and confidence in the leadership of my country makes my life much more pleasant. I don't generally believe I should let external things that I don't have control over affect my emotional well being so much, but the last 8 years caused much damage both on a world level, and to my delicate sensibilities.

I floated through 2008 without accomplishing any of my goals or desires. Enough of that. 2009 will not be a blur of just existing one day at a time. All that stuff that I haven't done that I wanted to do the last decade or so. Gonna make it happen.

I'm so very grateful for this community. May all of your wishes and desires for 2009 come true faster and easier than anticipated.