msbelle, you tease!

I'm not quite ready to sum everything up yet, but on the whole every year since my kids were born and since my mother died has been better than the one before. We still have big health issues threatening the future (esp for my MiL) but I try to live in the best parts of the present.

so it seems I may have met someone that I might find attractive and who might seem nice.

???????

There's not much more to say. Our paths cross almost weekly. We have a few things in common. We've talked a bit. It's hard for me to read people, but he seems willing to always stop a bit and chat, so you know, we'll see. I am trying to be more open in 2009.

My year has been more of the same. Same job, same apartment, same lack of relationship. I guess stability is good at this stage in my life (I feel ambivalent about having turned 35 last week), but I would love to make some changes in 2009, any of which would take more effort than I put in in 2008.

We'll see.

But, no major crises in my life or my family's, so I'm going to count the year as a win.

My 2008 is ending well. I flew to Denver this morning, and Suzi picked me up at the airport, and then we hung out at her house for a while before we came over to Nicole's to surprise her. She screamed. It was funny

2008 was the first year, in all my 48, when absolutely nothing of consequence happened. I don't really know how to feel about that. It seems as though I pretty much slept through it.

Of course there were lows:

• I experienced a medical depression that nearly led me to a cosmic exit. But a gracious friend steered me through it.
• I continued to slide farther into a breathtaking debt. But I was able to scrabble along, due in large part to the same friend hiring me for a lot of side jobs, bless her.

• I gained a bunch of weight. Probably due to the same physical issues that led to the depression. I don't have the resources to get it checked out and don't know when I will be able to. But, I'm not in pain and except for a bit of swelling in my left foot and weird big toenail in that foot, you'd never know anything was wrong.

• I have made no progress figuring out why doing excellent work does not equal making a decent living. I've thought all there is to think about it and done everything I know to do. There seems to be no practical, marketing, or spiritual solution to this riddle. I'd give up if I though giving up would help. On the other hand, the work I've done has been enormously fulfilling and I know I've changed people's lives for the better. They say so, and I believe them.

• I went without even a relationship nibble...except for the attractive married guy down whose road I will not go. But that doesn't really bother me.

• Bartleby is limping out of 2008 with an injured paw that I'm taking a massive 'wait and see' on considering the same thing happened in September and it cost me 2 bills to find out that nothing was wrong. But except for the limpity limping, he has been the greatest joy (next to my work) in my life. I sincerely cannot believe that, 7.5 years into my time with him, I love him incrementally more every single day. He is, quite frankly, it.

• I started the doggy lama pet coaching business and have done worshops every month but it continues to sputter along. But, I know I've done some good, had some fun, paid all Bartleby's upkeep expenses through my deal with the pet store AND gave my busy-bodyness at the dog park legitimacy that makes everybody happy.

• I spent my 10th year in this apartment with infestations, the ceiling falling in and everything getting shabbier and shabbier. Plus, my rent was raised to exactly 100% more than I paid when I moved in. 10% might be average per year, but this kick up was huge. BUT, my landlord, while still a monumental non-thinker did not poison me as he has done in previous years and actually fixed my toilet in 6 weeks...which is a record...especially considering he works downstairs from me 8 hours a day, 6 days per week.

  All in all, nothing terrible. But nothing great either.

  I declare 2008 a placeholder year and decree that 2009 will be a year of writing a lot, possibly giving up private practice and doing something about my health. The rest, I leave to the fates.

  This community, around which I have been hanging for, what? However many years it has been since the DC f2f...condinues to be a great gift of wisdom, humor, challenge and just plain smartitude, for which I give great thanks.

She screamed. It was funny

I did, and it was LOUD! Suzi and K-Bug came to the door and then K-Bug said they left stuff in the car so she wandered off while I helped Suz carry stuff upstairs. Suz and I were in the kitchen when K-Bug came back inside, so I turn around AND THERE'S PERKINS!!

Man oh man, I had no clue that Suzi and K-Bug could be so sneaky. Well played, y'all, especially Perkins.

Good end to the year. I can haz Perkins!

Happy New Year, b.org! And all the lovely denizens therein. Or, you know, thereupon?

She screamed. It was funny.

Heee. There should have been pictures! Heck, it's not too late, even now.

Man, I've got words, good and bad, but today was so busy I've had no time to sit and sort everything I want to say. I guess my first resolution will be to post my G&GR2008, tomorrow today!

Happy New Year all. I have a meandering post below. I may post more coherently later, at a time more conducive to coherence than 12:20 am.

Before I get into me, though, I want to comment to bonny: I had no idea you were having such an issue with depression in 2008. Meeting you last year (oops, year before last, now) was very special for me, and I'm sorry that I wasn't able to plan early enough for us to connect in person on recent trip East. You are kind and smart and perceptive and witty and helpful and interesting and patient and thoroughly good company. You are a very special person and you make this world a better place by being in it. Remember this. Please.

Over the last year, I've moved away from b.org, although I keep up with many of you through LJ, Facebook, and even Twitter. It's hard. I can't keep up here, at least not with Natter or Bitches, but Buffistas remains the online home of my heart. When I've needed medical advice, or reassurance that I wasn't crazy, or company when I was, you have been here. Buffistas are the only online people I've met in person, the only ones I've really invested in.

Now, LJ seems easier for me to keep up with, and even that has fallen by the wayside, pushed to the side by my current addictions to Twitter and Second Life, two communities that I've steadfastly decried as stoopid up until I fell madly in love with them a few months ago and a few weeks ago, respectively. I'm not sure that love is healthy, though, at least with Second Life, which is currently taking nearly as much time as my real one. In fact, my one definite resolution is that, after today, I will dial back my time in Second Life pretty dramatically, and will cut it out altogether if that proves too difficult. I've even enlisted a local friend to keep me honest in this.

Anyway, this has moved away from my point, which is that you mean a lot to me, even when I don't make it past Press, COMM, and, well, G&GR. Thank you.

Goodness, I hope sleepy posting isn't as bad as drunken posting.