I prefer to believe that Sam is the only child he will ever raise.

::sniff::

Uh, yeah, that.

I feel kinda lonely in my parsing of this episode.

I'm with you.

I also do not want Dean to believe Ben is his.

Until this part. I don't know what Dean believes, but he sure has been harping on deadbeat dads a lot. That seems like the reason for the visit to Lisa to me.

I prefer to believe that Sam is the only child he will ever raise.

I do like this sentiment though.

I know. I'm sorry. It seems to fit the narrative of Dean. :-(

If Dean has believed Ben is his this whole time, he's been a royal shithead. I don't like that character note. If he hasn't, and learns Ben is actually his, it forces a choice on him, and one outcome of that is an apple pie ending I don't actually want for the series.

Maybe the apple pie ending ("There'll be peace when you are done") is Heaven?

If Dean has believed Ben is his this whole time, he's been a royal shithead.

But he is a demon fighter. The best thing that he can do for Ben and Lisa would have been to stay as far away as possible. In doing that, Ben is able to be normal (was at baseball practice) and Lisa stays relatively safe. Dean is a soldier at war so I don't see this as a character flaw. I think he is doing what he thinks is best for them, not out running any responsibility.

I like Mo Ryan's idea that Dean made the decision to say yes to Michael when the boy was killed. I did think that they had the boy hunter made up like Dean Jr. When he turned his back to the camera to lean against the car, it was very Deanesque. I can see where bonding with other hunters seeing a younger version of himself cut down could have been the cumulative straw.

Also--it's been a long time since I have cried from preview clips. Damn.

I would like to know what he whispered. Damn it. I hate whispered secrets.

Dean knows what his father did for Adam, and we got to see the pain on his face that John had never done it for him. If he's been going through being a deadbeat father this whole time, I definitely judge Show for hiding all of that. I'm okay with having been shown all that time ago that Lisa is a symbol of family for him. But if he's been wrestling with actual paternity this whole time and fatherhood issues on top of issues with his father...fail. There's been no hint at all.

Alpen:

it's been a long time since I have cried from preview clips

You too, huh? Even Dark Side, which got me choked up and het up, didn't get me teared up. Which one (who) got you?