Thing is, although Dean's not drunk, he is drinking the entire time.

But even his perfect life, yeah, not perfect Dean.

But at least Sam gets in the car.

True.

What also hurts is how many people tell him to "get some rest." Dean's been a tired boy for a long, long time, with all that weight on his shoulders.

And he is a mechanic. Beer drinking, hot girlfriend having, mother loving (in a non-skeevy way), lawn mowing, mechanic.

This was just twelve kinds of beautiful. I don't even know where to start.

Oh, DEAN.

Oh, brotherly bond.

Oh, Mary Winchester.

Oh, DEAN.

Dean's self-esteem issues are still in full force. He fixes the one thing, his mother, but doesn't fix himself, and thusly his relationship with his brother is broken. He's a heel and a drinker, even though he snags a good woman.

Sam's regret that they didn't get along and gladness that the hunting had brought them together was definitely sniffworthy. The whole entreaties from the assembled for him to stay happy, even though it would really only be a few days--ah, love.

I just adored the episode.

When Mary shows up and lays her hand on his face ... that's the sound of me breaking.

Sam's pleas -- and that sorrowful "Why did you have to keep digging?" -- are just gutting. And the look on Dean's face at the end, too.

It's one of my very favorite episodes, and the one I drew on a lot when I did the essay for the Supernatural anthology.

Essay? Is it online? I'd love to read it.

I can't believe it had me crying by the ten minute mark. SPN often breaks my heart, but that was a lot, and fast. But how JA played seeing Mary was just beautiful. The disbelief, the relief, the happiness, the desperation. So much.

JP had a harder job, because his dream self started out kinda assy (since we were to be in the Dean camp 100%), but by the time he got in the car, it was just another version of the concern we've been used to. And the Stepford pleas at the end...

::shiver::

They were going to put some essays up online at various times, but I'm not sure. It's one of the BenBella SmartPop books, called In the Hunt.

And then we have Dean talking to dead Sam to look forward to ... OOF.

This is the Smart Pop site, but it doesn't look like the SPN essays are up right now.

I found teasers for the book and it looks very tempting. And a number of the essays so far seem to refer to “What Is and What Should Never Be”. It's very seductive. Great writing by Raelle Tucker, and great direction by Kripke.

Last night I popped in Folsom Prison Blues, cause I felt like I was missing out, not being able to watch and post with y'all.

Then I ended up watching the next three episodes and I am broken. It has been a while since I have done a rewatch and there were so many little moments I had forgotten. Things that feel like forshadowing of the current season, intended or unintended. An angel watching over Dean. Guh, broke my heart.