Well, it was a pretty good restaurant. (Note: Calli = old) The main reason I'd give the cat the name with the Pi symbol is to go for the pun, alas. Which probably doesn't say much about me as a pet owner-to-be.

I should probably wait until I have the cat, and see what his/her personality suggests.

At least the worst that happens with Samathea, is that I have to spell her name every time at the vet's office, and every time she is there for any length of time without me, her carrier ends up with a Samantha name tag.

The general message I've gotten is this: "Yeah, according to an outside standard -- which is often arbitrary -- you're fat. That's okay. It's not a crime, it's not a moral failing, and it's not that easy to get rid of, but that's okay, too. No matter what your size, you deserve love, respect, to be treated like any other human being, comfortable airline seats, romance, and pretty clothes. And fuck anyone who says otherwise."

One of the things that I NEED to change my thinking on, is the idea of doing healthy things like eating good healthy food, avoiding food that makes you feel icky (i.e. junk food that may taste good but afterward make you feel drained and blah), and exercising - doing these things because they make you feel stronger and healthier and more energetic is a worthwhile endeavor, nevermind that your body may never be skinny. That seems to be where Kate Harding is. I regret to say that I'm still very resentful that no amount of careful eating or exercise will make me thin.

But when I first saw Shapely Prose, I hated it as much as I hated myself, so avoided it for about a month. Then I told myself, "Nora has a point, you need to read this." And at first, it made me uncomfortable still. But I kept making myself read it, and I'm more comfortable with it. This is not easy. But there is glacial progress.

I regret to say that I'm still very resentful that no amount of careful eating or exercise will make me thin.

I'm right there with you. I understand that everyone has a different metabolism, and that some people can just switch from regular Coke to Diet Coke and lose weight. That drives me batshit insane, because my body is the kind bred throughout history to withstand famine.

OTOH, I'm having the weird -- and unprecedented -- experience of losing weight without doing jack or shit. And I don't mean my recent stomach virus, although that did give me an end-of-2008 weight-loss boost. (Horrible way to lose; I don't recommend it.) Switching to Wellbutrin has apparently had the common side effect of making me lose weight without me doing a damn thing out of the ordinary.

Honestly? It unnerves me. Because I feel like that weight loss should mean that Something Is Wrong. (OTotherOH, 4 years of Zoloft made me gain weight without me doing a damn thing out of the ordinary [which also unnerved me], so this might just be a pendulum swing back to the middle.)

Anyway. I've hit a point with exercise where I do it because I like the way it makes me feel and I like seeing my leg muscles get stronger. (I'm 99% sure I'm going to have to go back to physical therapy for my back, and I'm looking forward to properly strengthening those muscles, too.) I don't expect the exercise I do to make me lose weight anymore, and that's a new mindset for me, since I've spent literally the last 25 years since I was 12 believing that if I just exercised a little more, or did the "right kind" of exercise, then I'd be a size [whatever] and be thin and gorgeous.

I have always had vicious Body Image Demons. And this year I was on a billboard, bigger than life. Not once did it ever make me cringe or criticize my appearance up there. Five years ago, even one year ago, I wouldn't have thought that possible.

But I still resent those people who can just give up dessert for 2 weeks and drop 10 pounds.

My father is one of those people who can simply cut back a bit and instantly lose 10lbs. He's tall and thin and has been since he was a child. So of course, he considers all weight issues to be a matter of self-control or will power. He thinks because he can lose 10lbs by eating salads for a week, that everyone should be able to.

I can gain 10 lbs by eating salads for a week. I can gain weight during a week of stomach flu. The weight gain on Zoloft really shouldn't have surprised me. Oh well. I was going to head to the gym tonight anyway.

I gained weight on Weight Watchers as a teenager. They accused me of cheating. I stopped going.

One of our longtime friends online got two of this t-shirt for Christmas: [link]

I had to share the link.

wow. It's quiet in here today. Everyone off? Sure, I gotta work, and it's looking to be a slow day, and nobody to entertain. No deep conversations. No battle royale of quips. I swear, its a conspiracy. Y'all only do those fun things when I am working busy days and can't play along.

Yup, omnis, total conspiracy. It's like the Stargate SG-1 fic in which Jack, Sam, and Teal'c call each other to coordinate what color BDUs to wear that day, and then tell Daniel the wrong color.

It's how we show our love AND make you crazy.

I'm here. Entertaining... hmm. Did you know there's a huge volcano under yellowstone that could erupt with less than one week's notice ending life in North America as we know it?