Hil, thinking of you and vibing hard that it's nothing (but covered).

Sean, you know we love you. Always.

And on a lighter note, I just got an email from one of my students that made me snorfle and had to share. Some context: we've been studying various mythological texts, and the concept of "axis mundi" and phallic symbols came up (no pun intended). This is the email I just got from one of my (14 year old female) students:

i was reading some poems the other day, which i found slightly amusing,however one of them i would not have been able to understand a month ago.

Now I am able to appruciate this poem.

ONCE I LIVED IN CAPITALS

MY LIFE INTENSELY PHALLIC

but now I’m sadly lowercase

with the occasional italic

-Roger McGough

I hope this makes you feel its all been worthwhile.

Phallic symbols, I teach well. Proofreading, nsm. I'm torn between horror, headdesk, and hysterical laughter.

Don't feel bad about it.

I found it amazing how much my understanding of poetry sometimes differs from the world's/classmates interpretation.

Then again, I come back to my "associative mind" argument. You're my only friend on the earth, brainsy!

Oh, I don't feel badly. This is one of my cleverest students (proofreading errors notwithstanding), and she means the email with all good humor. It's just so funny, is all. Makes me giggle.

P.S. I am in love with "brainsy" and plan to create a cartoon character named "Brainsy" immediately.

I thing that the thing about poetry is that one can never be sure of the interpretation. Which is, lets face it, kindda scary. I mean, I can go on forever about my favorite poems, only to find the "correct", "acceptable" interpretation is about the poet's erection.

Look, I suck at subtext. Never understood why the privileged people of these days and age insisting on keeping using it (in poetry, not in other forms of art). Dudes, you can say what you want on the text level! Yes, please, use imagery, metaphors, metonomy (sp?) but don't tell me after loving to death a certain piece of art that I read it wrong!

The day porn will include subtext, I'll know the world really went mental.

Shir, I'm sorry if I upset you; I didn't mean to. That particular poem is based on a silly sexual innuendo, not intended to be studied seriously. I was mostly just amused that one of my students sent it to me and understood what it meant. I wasn't trying to make any grander statement than that.

I'm sorry if I upset you

O-oh, I should have lifted my "I'm only (half) kidding!" sign, right?

I'm amused too, and letting some rant out on the way.

Also, to clarify my last post: I didn't mean that subtext is always evil, or that I'm stupid who doesn't get it.

I just like my interpretation to some things better. Even if it's lame.

And now I think I'll let the subject rest again.

Oof, I am tired. Sean, I am glad to know things are going better. What an awful situation.

Hil, nothing bad-ma atcha. I need you to be mathy for me soon!

Pix, I love that your student is emailing "yay, I get it, thanks!" emails to you. How wonderful.

And my new job? Intensely demanding and crazy-busy, but I think I am rocking it like whoa so far. I feel my brain booting back to life after, really, 5 months off in toto. I worked 1 to 11 pm shifts yesterday and today, and work a 9 to 7 pm tomorrow (10 hour weird shifts because of training) and I am trying to wind down before I shower and sleep.

And yo, how did I repress the exciting world of testimony-worthy documentation? Oh...yeah. But it is scarily enough flowing back, in all its exacting, specific, jargon-riddled glory. Word. (And word, and word, and word...)

Now I am able to appruciate this poem.

Phallic symbols, I teach well. Proofreading, nsm.

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I remember when I was 19 and in London for a semester abroad, I had JUST discovered the deeply fascinating world of feminist social views regarding the evils of phallocentrism and how it had ruined MY life. If I let it. (Bad phalli, no cookie!) EVERYTHING was phallic. It became a group joke "Look! A phallus!" and as a result, I have about a million pictures of every spire, obelisk, tower and jutty pointy thing in 90's London, Bath, Dover and Canterbury. Also? Pizza Hut placemats from all of those cities.

Hmm. I didn't get laid ONCE in England. Methinks I was scanning for too many symbolic phalluses and not talking to the people attached to the real ones. How did I end up not laid in England at 19 in 1993? I am ASHAMED of myself.

Back from ER. They said it seemed like nothing -- EKG was "squeaky-clean," and I don't seem to have a blood clot. Official diagnosis on my discharge papers was "palpitations," which was the reason I went in to begin with.

Why is ER so cold? I had to keep my winter jacket on the entire time I was inside.

Snuggling up in blankets and getting to bed now.