I love how awesome it is that Jess can travel to the other side of the continent and has friends-as-babysitters Right.There with added peer-playmates AND commentary.

Sean, I'm just glad there are people close by if you decide that alone time has gone on long enough.

{{{{Sean}}}}

Plus I kept trying to blame Daniel for "dragging" me to it in the first place. Poor guy

see, that's why there needs to be drinking. And the stress was worth it, because you looked STUNNING.

Blushes. Thanks. Yeah, if the drinking had started earlier, not only would I not have been feeling no pain while dancing, I would have inflicted less on Daniel.

Thanks for the continued compliments, people. I tried to hold on to the afterglow to keep the BID at bay. It worked for a while, but they've been slipping in again. This helps. Also, I keep trying to make up reasons to wear the Outfit again.

To maintain the 130, I a) worked 2 physically demanding jobs, walked 3 miles back and forth to work AND rode an exercise bicycle for 30 minute a day, as well as eating no "white" foods, 5 servings of vegetables, 5 of fruit, and pretty much only tuna fish with no dressing.

This kind of regimen would get me down to about a size 22. I'd still be too fat to be a plus size model. When I complain about how my weight loss efforts yield such disappointing results to lay people, they generally advise going to a doctor, because clearly there is something wrong. But what no one can tell me is how to force a doctor to believe that someone my size not only is capable of comprehending a diet, and following it accurately, but also has in fact, actually done so. I have had the lovely experience of making myself write down what I was eating for weeks, carefully measuring every little thing (right down to the artificial creamer for my coffee), shown it to the doctor, and had the doctor reply, "If this is all you are eating, you should be losing weight." The hell of it is, she said in a fairly friendly way. So it took me a few years to figure out the unspoken, "Since you aren't losing weight, it's impossible to believe that this is what you are eating. So there is nothing I am willing to do for you."

Are there magic words for this? I mean, aside from, "Three of those pounds on my current weight are from the handgun I'm aiming at your head. Now, get to work, Dr. House."

She's also learned that she can only make a proforma request for me to consider gastric bypass. Not going to happen unless they make it less dangerous and reversible, sorry.

"Learned"....from you, you mean?

Indeed.

Well done. I mean that wholeheartedly.

So it took me a few years to figure out the unspoken, "Since you aren't losing weight, it's impossible to believe that this is what you are eating.

This is perhaps the most maddening part of being fat and trying to get good healthcare. Because *clearly* every single human being on the face of the planet burns calories in the exact same manner and at the exact same rate as a calorimeter in a laboratory. And *clearly* while there's age-, hormonal-, gender-, and disease-related reasons (among others) for people to *metabolize* medications differently, they should still all metabolize food exactly alike. Because human beings are all exactly alike in every detail. That's why we're all the same height, race, hair color, eye color, nose shape, and belly-button status. Riiiiight?????

So if you say you're starving yourself (which is a lousy way to try to lose weight but one hell of a way to make yourself gain over the long term), but you aren't losing weight, why, then, despite NO other evidence, you MUST be lying.

A pox on all of them. Hippocratic oath, my fat ass.

"If this is all you are eating, you should be losing weight." The hell of it is, she said in a fairly friendly way. So it took me a few years to figure out the unspoken, "Since you aren't losing weight, it's impossible to believe that this is what you are eating. So there is nothing I am willing to do for you."

It baffles me that people don't think that fat people know we are fat and that it must be because we binge eat every meal and have no idea how to feed ourselves. In many cases, this is just not true. We must not know that doughnuts have more calories than celery otherwise we wouldn't be fat, duh!

Andi, do you read the Shapely Prose website? (kateharding.net). It's so awesome. I try not to get into fatosphere stuff here because it can be very fraught with issues and emotions, but I think you (and Daniel) would dig on her style.

ETA: Righteous fat anger cross post (sorta) with Teppy, natch.

Having gone from severely underweight as a kid, to the point where the doctor advocated my eating raw eggs and steak in order to put some weight on me, to being a jock and very active, to very overweight (as in 250 pounds on a 5'2 1/2" frame), and then finally back to something approximating a normal weight for my frame and body type, I have no patience for medical experts who say that it's all a matter of willpower or you must be doing something wrong or you're lying.

So if'n y'all want, I'm very happy to take Bertha the Big Baseball Bat to anyone. Regardless of weight, I've always had a helluva swing.

Sean, I'm sorry things have been so rough for you lately. I hope the situation is resolved soon.

mini-meara:

you made such a great impression

Thank you. That's crazy talk, but thank you.

Indeed. Poor Deena was stuck in a plane next to me for hours on the way to SF.

That was awesome, Laura. I had no time to get nervous beforehand.

I would like Vortex's personality, please.

I just wanted to hang near her, but then I was afraid she'd think I was going to light-finger her coat, which was almost as awesome as she is.

Wanting downtime or personal space was selfish and therefore sinful

My parents were the ministers, and both are extroverts; so I got this all the time. Not wanting to go bowling on the day of my brother's funeral (so we could all have some fun and take our mind off of things) really pissed everyone off (my siblings are extroverts too).

I don't really want to be groped by anyone, even my invisible online friends.

I know everyone's already answered this, but I wanted to add that I saw no gropeage or anything out-of-the-ordinary- uncomfortable-making except the stripy tights and candy bra (which didn't make me uncomfortable, but was definitely out of my ordinary).

I keep being told that to lose weight I need to exercise more. Of course, I can't actually do much more. I'm trying to maintain what little I can do, which my current crop of doctors seem to understand.

The recent visit with the neurologist was cool. He was such a sweet guy and wanted so badly to help me but really had nothing he could do except tell me all these things that might help the insomnia, which he didn't really seem to think could be helped without some therapy.

I've been trying the stuff he suggested and I'm a basket case. Even more exhausted than usual, irritable and twitchy. It's been weird and frustrating.

I was finally approved for combo talk therapy woman/psychiatrist guy by the insurance for a whopping 8 visits... with an out of network provider. I didn't request and can't afford an out of network provider, so I have to go through it all again.

I was finally approved for combo talk therapy woman/psychiatrist guy by the insurance for a whopping 8 visits... with an out of network provider. I didn't request and can't afford an out of network provider, so I have to go through it all again.

weeps

As someone who apparantly is willing to put up with asshat brain doctor behavior due to the pain of finding someone who MIGHT be better, I feel your pain. Ugh! That just sucks.

also: DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENAAAAAAAAAA!

Deena Deena Deena!