Barb, your parents make my head spin. Damn!

meara, if you *didn't* feel like you were falling apart, I'd worry about you. The past couple of years have been VERY roller-coaster-y for you.

I second (third, fourth, etc.) everyone's suggestion of going to your GP first, as long as you like your GP. The fucking ironic pisser about mental health care is that, when you truly need it, it feels like scaling Everest just to get an appointment set up.

ION (and I don't mean to be all me me me), I just got my picture taken for the billboard. Everyone was nice and helpful and the photographer kept telling me I looked fantastic and was posing like a pro. We did the shots outside, because the evening light was lovely. I wore a blue v-neck sweater that all y'all have probably seen on me (or, at least, seen me wear in pictures) a million times before, and the hair/makeup woman blew my hair out straight, which looks good but SO WEIRD to me, since I'm used to letting it go curly. Makeup was more or less what I normally wear, with the addition of some taupe-y eyeshadow and some lipstick.

They're going to e-mail me some of the pictures in the next couple of weeks, so I can post them then. And when my big giant head is up on a billboard, I'll *obviously* take pictures of that, too! (And, of course, post them.)

(And, okay, I took one picture of me with my own camera, doing the hold-camera-at-arm's-length trick: [link] I *swear* that I didn't do any Photoshop-fu, other than getting rid of the double-chin that inevitably results when I do the hold-camera-at-arm's-length trick [i.e., when I say I didn't do any Photoshop-fu, the color -- including my eyes (which, WOW) -- is straight out of the camera].)

Rowr, Tep--That is seriously, I'm ready for my closeup, Mr. DeMille territory.

And yes, my parents are absolutely fucked. And no doubt, fucking by this point. Who knows? I know I don't want to.

Is the cheap AD one that makes you gain weight? Or makes you anti-sex? I am v. anti both of those things.

You're not going to know that ahead of time, unfortunately. Personally I'm a lot less interested in sex without the meds, so that street doesn't only go one way. Thank god.

Billboard!Tep is fucking hot.

Is the cheap AD one that makes you gain weight? Or makes you anti-sex?

Not all ADs affect all people the same way. Having been down that pit of hell myself, I firmly believe the most important thing is to start feeling better ASAP. Which is where the drugs come in. Once the drugs have you feeling like you can benefit from talky therapy, then ideally you wouldn't have to take the ADs forever and ever.

Which is not to say you can just take them for a couple of weeks and BAM!, instant happy! But you know that. I feel like, the drugs get you to where you can cope with stuff, and learn from therapy. And what you learn *can* keep you in a place where you might not need the ADs. I stopped mine after 4 years on Zoloft, because my therapy helped me so much. (And I don't mean that I'm all sane and shit, and able to cope with every situation, because I'm not sane and I *can't* cope with every situation. But I can cope with *most,* which I think is pretty fucking good.)

Anyway. Shorter version of what I just babbled about: don't worry about weight gain or potentially decreased sex drive -- *if* the drugs lead to either side effect, (1) you might not be on the drugs for a long time anyway, and/or (2) you could switch drugs. Lots of people do.

The most important thing is to help you, and I think that Step 1 is drugs.

Billboard!Tep is fucking hot.

Look out Cincinnati!

Top 50?

ETA Hot Teppy!

And I can't believe I got Top 50, given that the old Bitches had already ended before I left the office to go to a work party and then to take advantage of the fact the party was on the main campus to go to the library and breathe old book smell and find some books on Wellington and Napoleon I haven't read yet.

Tep, that is a fabulous picture of you.

meara, the Citalopram/Lexapro has no side effects for me, aside from being a little sleepy the first week or two. And what brenda said about the sex -- so not a problem.

Of course, there are lots of different ADs out there, all with different side effects, but I'm sure there are more than the one on the $4 list. You can look it up on Target or ... somewhere. Stephen looked it up for me, and I can ask where he found it.

Barb, the sci fi comment made me snort iced tea. ::wipes face sheepishly:: Your parents, dude. That's ... some kind of story, all right.

Teppy on a billboard! So cool.

sj, I'm still having trouble processing the fact that people are so fucking rude. I would *never* ask that! And to email about it, not, like, drop into a casual conversation while you're hanging out or something, which seems at least a little less offensive? People are so fucking entitled. "I want to know, so tell me!" Jesus.

Meh, more worried about weight gain than sex--sex I can (and have) certainly do without, and figure if/when I was OK to be done with drugs it would be a non issue. But weight gain is a bigger problem (er, literally!), cause then you have to actually, y'know, work at it. IJS. And having worked in the drug industry, while I'm aware that all drugs affect people differently (heck, one drug I am currently taking is well known for it's anorexic side effects, some people have to stop taking it because they just stop eating when they're on it...me, I haven't had that at all, though I was kinda hoping for a little!). But in as much as starting from scratch not knowing which would be effective for the main purpose of "make me HAPPY!" is a crapshoot, I'd rather avoid ones that are known for those side effects, y'know?

And of course, this is all theoretical. Lord knows, a doctor could talk to me and say "Meh, you're a mess, but drugs won't help ya". Or "I ALWAYS start people on Drug X" or whatever. But I like to be a well-informed patient. :)