t waves

Hi everyone! Interesting discussion you are all having. Fwiw, I am on the preferring "women" to "lady" side of the conversation, in all aspects of sports. I've always hated the "Lady Vols" title because it does feel so demeaning. The word "lady" is so loaded with cultural expectations and condescension, especially when it's linked to sports. That said, I know Omnis really well and know he would never intentionally use terminology demeaningly. I think it's really difficult to re-learn how to talk about women when you've been raised by a misogynistic parent, and I'm always so impressed with his willingness not to be defensive when someone calls him out, but to genuinely seek to understand. I have told him this lovingly in the past when I've had to smack him upside the head about something else. ;-) (The emoticon was a necessary evil for that statement. Apologies.)

In unrelated news, Vortex, I meant to say in my last epic post that I really hope you get the job you were looking into. It sounds like it might be perfect. Good luck!

I've skimmed most of the last 200 posts, so I'm sorry if I've missed anything else. I did see the conversation about body image demons, and it made me want to give everyone a big hug and tell them how beautiful you all are. I'm so impressed with Teppy and Erin and anyone else who has worked so hard to re-frame their self-image in order to be comfortable and happy in their bodies. It's such a difficult thing to do. I hesitate to say anything else about my personal size and weight, but I will add on to Jessica's (I think it was you?) comment that she can't afford to gain weight if she wants clothes to go to work. Oh GODS do I empathize with that. It's not that I mind horribly when I go up a size or two, which I've done over the years, but I hate hate HATE not having clothes that fit properly. Nothing makes me feel uglier than wearing clothes that are too small, but I just can't afford to keep going out and replacing my wardrobe. I honestly think that at least a third of my current credit card debt is left over from having to buy new clothes for work when my weight fluctuates. ARGH.

Anyway, I finished my scuba final exam last night and the last of my pool training for the second level of certification (PADI Open Water Diver) this morning. In just over an hour, I'll be heading over to Grand Cayman to do my final two open water dives. Whee! Cozumel has the reputation of being one of the most beautiful dive sites in the world, but sadly the hurricane awhile back devastated the reef. There's barely any color there right now, and it will take hundreds of years to recover. I enjoyed my dives there yesterday (and saw moray eels, and a skate, and tons of pretty fish and plants), but I hear that Grand Cayman is downright beautiful.

Cass, I had forgotten that you dive! Maybe someday we can dive together! (Without sharks. I have a feeling I may see some today. I hope in that case that I, too, will discover that it is possible to recover from a panic attack under water.)

Have you ever heard the saying, "Ladies don't sweat, they glisten"? Sweating is far too vulgar a bodily function for a proper lady to indulge in.

Horses sweat. Men perspire. Women glow. (or women "feel the heat" in my mother's version of this saying)

Day three of orientation. While I will not have to work 12-14 hours today, I do have to go right from work to my co-worker's father's wake in VA, so I won't get home until 9 or 10 tonight. Zzzz.

Quick question: how does this sound for Tom to send to folks at a job he interviewd at more than a month ago? (he hasn't sent anything except a follow up thank you email within a week of the interview)

I hope your summers are going well, despite all the rain. I just wanted to follow up on my interview with you and your colleagues on July 11. I was wondering if the position is still open, and if so, let you know that I am still interested. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to assist you from this end, and I wish you luck in your search for developers.

Nora, I think that sounds great.

it is possible to recover from a panic attack under water.

Something tells me that this is more difficult than convincing myself to accept my fat.

In RE: vw's meeting CBD's parents going well - raise your hands if you are at all surprised... anyone? Crickets.

Omnis, I toddled off to bed after calling you out last night, and I apologize for not being around to give you a proper answer -- and in the mean time, Kristin said it perfectly. For what it's worth, I've never thought you were anything other than a genuinely good dude in need of a little dope slap.

The issue with "ladies" is that it connotes a class (think aristocracy) or a behavior/culture (think southern belles) where men are the actors and women are expected to be decorative. That's where the mindset of actresses who think they don't sweat is coming from. So in everyday life, it gets my back up -- but in sports, it's even more problematic, since the implication of being a decorative object is directly antithetical to competition. If you can't muss your hair, you're not really pushing your hardest.

And I hear comments all the time (yes, in 2008) saying that women in sports *are* still expected to to look pretty and not too competitive. Why does she have to look so mean. Why can't she smile more. I wish they wouldn't yell like that -- it's so ugly. Ooh, is that the sport with the bikinis/leotards/tight pants. AthleteName looks like a man. And on and on and fucking on. And I'm not calling you out specifically for that level of crap, but it's absolutely part of our culture when it comes to watching women's sports.

"Lady" sports teams are in fact a huge issue; they're a remnant of the first days of women's sports teams. It's unthinkable for girls to be Bulldogs, or Tigers, or whatever, so we'll make them Lady Bulldogs, and Lady Tigers. They aren't the real thing; they're cute and unthreatening. And you know, since you obviously know women's basketball, that in reality, those women are absolutely fierce athletes -- but the name still suggests "not really as tough as the Mighty Fightin' Whatnots".

Trust me, women sweat!

Oh yeah. Denotation/connotation thing going on in this issue. We all know what the words mean; but they mean something different to different people.

IOtotalcutenessN, when I woke up to Harvey purring, he had taken over my pillow, leaving me with a small corner. Sammie was lying on the headboard right next to him, identical position. Synchronized cat napping. It was cute enough to forgive the pillow theft.

"not really as tough as the Mighty Fightin' Whatnots".

Dude. Now I have to sponsor a softball team, just so I can name it that.

"...the Mighty Fightin' Whatnots are looking good this year against last year's rival team, Sammy's Pub's Loutish Drunken Slobfaces..."

In RE: vw's meeting CBD's parents going well - raise your hands if you are at all surprised... anyone? Crickets.

I can't even say *I'm* totally surprised. I was just anxious for a bit.

So, in my anxious stupidity, I wore heels last night. This morning my hip REALLY hurts, and I can hardly walk. I'm trying to decide if I can get myself to therapy, or if I need to go crawl back into bed with some ice packs. I've already been to the chiro, so it should feel better soonish, I hope.

can I get a little quick dentist~ma? Just a regular visit, but a new dentist and I HATE dentists.