You came to a mature decision and communicated it honestly even though you felt like "the bad guy" that's gutsy and kind and really, would that more men knew how to handle things the way you have.
I feel odd commenting, since I know so little about the situation, but I'm agreeing so strongly I feel a need to reiterate the above.
Emotional courage and honesty are the two greatest gifts you can give anyone. And it is rare to find individuals mature enough to use them.
Bless you for being loyal, and kind enough to do the right thing.
I still hurt all over and deep down, and feel like I've been punched very hard in the gut. I feel like I want to throw up.
This also makes total sense. Not only are you dealing with the emotional overload, but the build up of physical toxins that result from the emotional overload.
If I could offer one scrap of advice, it would be to treat yourself as if you have experienced a shock...keep your body temperature comfortable, use whatever methods are appropriate for muscle relaxing (hot baths are my tool of choice because you get the relaxation with bonus toxin excretion), get plenty of rest (even if you don't actually sleep), drink lots of water and in general, be gentle with your body. Doing so can help to keep the emotional strain for weakening you so much that you end up suffering needlessly.
Wishes for ease winging your way.
eta: Oh, and, if you are open to such things, I recommendthe Bach Flower Remedy "Rescue Remedy" you can get it at any healthfood store. Even if you don't 'believe' in such things, it can't hurt and I've seen it help hundreds of times.
Goodness knows, Buffistas have the empirical evidence of the awe inspiring power of ~ma.
{{{Sean}}} I'm sorry for you and for S.
{{{Sean}}} I realize I hardly know you, but if there's anything I can do, even if it's just calling in a free pass so you can escape to a movie for a couple hours, please let me know. I'm Lagarat at gmail.
Sean, I'm very sorry for the both of you. I agree with the others, it's so hard being the one to end a relationship; it means a lot that you ended it honestly.
What they have said, Sean. I left my first husband after 12 years and it was the worst pain imaginable. I knew it was the right thing to do, but that didn't make it any less painful. Please take care of yourself and consider staying at Drew & Kristin's for a bit. Emotional support is a good thing.
consider staying at Drew & Kristin's for a bit. Emotional support is a good thing.
This is wonderful advice.
Sean, all the best to you--and to S.
Good on you for having the courage to do the right thing, especially because it was so damned hard. You'll both be in my thoughts.
I'm still at work.
Been in a meeting ALL DAY, second day in a row. We have said we were going to call it quits a few times, and here we still are...
Oh, dear, Suzi. I'll pour a margarita through the interpipes for you.
Also, needing a bit of a pick-me-up myself, I resorted to the BRQG. This little spot of delicious crudity made me laugh so hard the cats ran to the other room:
Betsy: Nothing will ever replace "fuck me gently with a chainsaw!" in my heart.
billytea: Not even "Bugger me sideways with a fish-fork"?
Miracleman: Or "Fuck him up the ass with a combination harvester"?
Oh come now, people! I fly to a whole other state, and you only manage 15 posts?? What is up with THAT?
I am at the hotel, it is dinnertime, I am apparently quite close to a lovely river/park thing, but I am dreadfully exhausted (for no clear reason--we did not get up early today and I got sleep last night (unlike the ngiht before)). I am tempted to eat the two cookies they gave me (OK, I already ate one--its' oatmeal walnut chocolate chip! it was still warm!!) and call that dinner and go to sleep.
But it's 7pm and instead I will just be annoyed that by the time I get the energy to go find food and eat it, So You Think You Can Dance will have already started, and I don't have TiVO in the hotel. Where is the Future, where my TiVo is my computer???