Oh, Tep. ::hugs you::

Um, don't drink beer. But I don't think an Ativan would hurt. It doesn't have any effect on the fullness of your bladder, or anything else.

Are they doing an ... invasive, for lack of a better word, ultrasound? With the wand? Or just the regular on-top-of-the-belly kind?

Just breathe, babe. Odds are it's nothing serious, and odds are *really* good it's not an alien baby.

What is PIV sex? Penetrative? You kids and your acronyms.

I vote giant alien baby with teeth, but then, I'm that sort of person.

In all seriousness, I vote in favor of deep calming breaths and something shiny to wave in front of your brain that will get it out of the overthinky panic cycle it's in right now.

The only reason I wouldn't choose beer before an ultrasound is that the reason they want you drinking liquid is so your bladder will be full and easy to see. Meaning they won't let you pee. So something slightly less diuretic than beer might be more, um, comfortable. I don't see any reason you couldn't take an Atvian, though.

Amy, I believe the middle word is "in" and the other 2 are anatomical nouns.

What is PIV sex?

Penis In Vagina.

Ah! Thank you, Debet. And Jess! Sometimes you really need to lead me to the right answer ...

Steph, I'm right on board with everyone saying have an Ativan.

Also, if it is a giant alien baby with teeth, we will welcome him with open arms and you will get all sorts of hand-me-downs so you won't need to worry about clothing it. Plus, think of all the money you'll get from SciFi cheannel when they make "Midwestern Alien Baby" the #1 cable movie next year.

We love you honey. Hang in there and have that Ativan.

Teppy, all of that is very stress (and beer) worthy. I hope that when it's over, there is no longer any reason to stress because whatever the dx, it's easy to treat and you can enjoy your vacation.

And to all you people who are hoping it's an alien baby (MM I'm looking at you) . . . just stop it.

::trying to be funny, possibly failing miserably::

I forgot to say yay for Sass! Poor thing. There's really no explaining lack of park to a puppy.

Also, Aims is clearly a cookie thief. Pass it on.

And to all you people who are hoping it's an alien baby (MM I'm looking at you) . . . just stop it.

I didn't say I hope it's an alien baby.

But if it is, can I have it?

Teppy, I'm assuming you've told your doctor about the whitefont, because that seems like something note-worthy.

She didn't seem overly concerned; she was like, "Well, that happens."

EVERY TIME?

But, whatev. Maybe I'm physiologically built weird. Like, small or crooked or something.

t Edited to take out info that nobody needs to know.