I think this one is a true drabble. (I finally looked up what that means.)

Security

He climbed over his snoring brother and off the bed. In the corner of the dirt floor, he found the stashed condom.

Standing on the clothes-filled trunk, he nudged open the creaky window and climbed through. His bare feet found purchase on the scratchy, uneven stones, and he landed, heavily, on the gravel road.

The narrow chain-linked section of the endless wall had not been replaced by cement. She smiled, her young fingers poking through the metal latticework to touch him.

It was wonderfully awkward, and she cried. “Shalom,” she whispered. “Salaam,” he replied, but she was already gone.

Oh, that is awesome, Wolfram! Isn't it wonderful fitting so much into so little?

Thanks Sail, and it's totally wonderful. I had to slash mercilessly at my first draft (168 words) to cut in down to what you see, but it just seems tighter now.

Exactly. I could not write at all if I didn't have artificially imposed boudaries. My writing tends to wander all over the place and then kind of peter out having gone absolutely nowhere. With drabbles, it forces me to really see the words I'm using and how to use them to the most effect.

I've actually done more creative writing in this thread in the last two weeks than I have done in, well, years. Should have popped in a long time ago.

That's nicely done, Wolfram. Now I want to know what happens next.

That's what's been so much fun, and so interesting, about Sail doing her drabbles around the girl and the penguin cookie jar. It's like looking at a photograph album--you only get glimpses, which seem to tell a life story.

Yeah, it's a really wonderful medium. It's a great exercise for me because it refines my lyric-writing quite a bit. I tend to sell short lyrics because I feel like there's so little that can be said, but a drabble is even shorter, so I have no excuse not to pack lyrics to their full capacity.

Plus, I just like the drabbles, because there's no intimidation factor. 100 words? Why sure, I can do that. And then of course it's much harder than I imagined, but there I am, writing, and it's off to the races.

erika - Just letting you know I haven't forgotten you and I am betaing your stuff. Just been busy.

Oh, well, hurry... don't wanna disappoint my fan. It's okay...really need to temper my feedback junkie ways.

I'm looking for a beta reader or two who's willing to take a look at my WIP. It's still rough and 150-200 pages from being finished (it's around 300 pages now), so I'm looking for big picture stuff--i.e. do the characters and story pretty much work, and if not, what might make them work better.

Given the market I'm targeting, I'm looking for a beta who enjoys military historicals and/or historical fantasy, just to make sure I'm hitting that Bernard Cornwell-Patrick O'Brian-Naomi Novik sweet spot.