I feel that if you want the elevator doors to close faster, you can hit the "close doors" button.

A few weeks ago I read an article about elevators (I forget where). They quoted some elevator industry guy who said those "close doors" buttons don't do anything.

Mystery of the day: Why does having 2 toaster waffles fro breakfast only lead to me being hungry an hour later, but when I eat three waffles, I'm full for hours?

maybe eat two and half and see what happens?

A few weeks ago I read an article about elevators (I forget where). They quoted some elevator industry guy who said those "close doors" buttons don't do anything.

It was this very long New Yorker article: [link]

In most elevators, at least in any built or installed since the early nineties, the door-close button doesn’t work. It is there mainly to make you think it works. (It does work if, say, a fireman needs to take control. But you need a key, and a fire, to do that.)

I think that Jesse and shrift need to conduct a not-scientific experiment and start a rumor in their respective buildings about [something] that makes the elevators go faster. Then see how long it takes for the rumor to infect their workplaces. E.g., tell people that pressing the button to the beat of the first verse of the Itsy-bitsy Spider can make it skip floors and come direct.

That would be hilarious, and people in my building would totally go for it.

So, it's a good thing I'm home, because apparently the guy upstairs is, too, and is doing something that makes water drip into my bathroom. @@ Last time, he was installing a new sink. In a rental apartment. Without turning the water off, apparently.

My issue with elevators is those that close too fast when I have a huge book truck full of oversize books. And with elevator users who do not respect my authority when I am pushing same. I mean, I could kill people with my book trucks.

So, I spent most of last week moving books to accommodate books from X department. I emailed my contact this morning to say the spaces are ready. She emailed back to say, oh, they must have counted wrong but they have more space than they expected and maybe they don;t want to move anything down to my area after all. Grrr.

My apartment building has the old-fashioned elevators with the sliding metal gate on the inside and regular doors on the outside. First, it's a pain to open both the door and the gate when you're carrying something heavy and/or big, and second - if someone leaves the inside metal gate slightly open, the elevator will just stay on that floor until someone closes it. This happens fairy often, taking one elevator temporarily out of service....

We had one of those in my old building. It was a freight elevator that usually was off limits, but had to be used when the main elevator was being repaired. It was worse because it was a regular door that didn't always shut all of the way.

I make them by melting Milky Way bars with some butter and then adding the Rice Krispies. Then top them off with some melted Hershey bars.

nom.

My usual elevator pet peeve is when people wait so long to exit that the elevator doors close in my face as I'm trying to get on. Make it snappy, people! MOVE MOVE MOVE.

What I despise is the people who not only take too long to exit, but, when the doors open and reveal (GASP!) someone standing there waiting to get on (that would be ME), they stare all slack-jawed and dead-eyed, like they simply don't understand why there's someone standing there! Because clearly people only EXIT on that floor, never actually GET ON the elevator at that floor.

And the corollary, when I get on at the lowest parking garage level, and the elevator stops at the successive parking levels, and the doors open to reveal (GASP!) SOMEONE IS ALREADY ON THE ELEVATOR!!!! My god, HOW?!? HOW DID SOMEONE GET ON BEFORE ME?!? And so they just stand there, (once again) all slack-jawed and blank-eyed, as they try to puzzle through how there could possibly already be someone on an elevator that they summoned for their own conveyance. Some of them -- and I swear to you this is true -- have stood there and stared in astonishment for long enough that the doors closed.

WTF?

Cash, those bars sound amazing.

I'm writing my syllbus still. It's a pain the ass to plan an entire year of work in a few days. Especially since I've never done this before.

Did anyone hear the "In Character" on NPR this morning? It was about Buffy. YAY!