My mom just called. She was walking in a mall, when suddenly she saw a shadow in the corner of her eye and felt someone touching her bag. She turned around and punched the guy, hard.

Damn, that is AWESOME. The kind of thing I always hope I'd do, but probably wouldn't. (Er, well, the punching a pickpocket thing, not punching someone I know trying to surprise me)

I wish that every woman that was brushed up against grossly on the subway, or worse grabbed in anyway would take an open hand slap to the guy's crotch.

Ew. But that would involve my hand and his crotch. Can't I like, elbow him in the crotch or something?

I just heard on the radio that there is a HOT TUB in the middle of hte highway, causing traffic accidents. Er...

This is making my mouth water. I love a good unsalted butter.

Meara, if you slap openhanded you can cup with the fingertips and also smack from behind the nuts. Rumour has it that this exacerbates the whole thing. Plus, the closer your elbow is to his crotch, the closer your face is.

ita, there are some Amish ladies at the farmer's market by my office who sell logs of fresh butter that would kill you ded. So amazing.

Ew. But that would involve my hand and his crotch.

Oh yeah, that was my reaction as well.

So I posted about the Cargo Pants Situation and people keep telling me to try on men's cargo pants.

I don't think that's going to work, considering that I'm short and not thin. Also, I have no idea what I'd be in men's sizing. Women's sizing is difficult enough.

I just had a syringe fall out of my lunch bag while someone was in my office.

That was fun.

Men's sizing makes so much more sense. Waist measurement & inseam measurement.

FEH. After two days of off site meetings , plus not having been at this location since last tuesday, I find it hard to remember what I am doing.

I need tax help! I am so confused!

I get company stock options. Last year, I made a same-day sale of some of these options.

Now, that showed up in my W-2 in Box 14, labeled ISOGN.

But I also have a 1099-B in my E*Trade account, so I have to fill out a Schedule D somehow.

I'm using three different online tax programs: TurboTax, TaxACT, and H&R Block's TaxCut.

The first two programs only ask for the cost of the shares (which is not on the 1099-B but I think is the number of shares I sold times the strike price, plus the commission and fee) and then the revenue (which is on the 1099-B). They come out with a capital gain of approximately the amount I made on the sale and tax accordingly.

HRBlock, on the other hand, calculates the cost-basis differently. It asks me for the cost of the shares and then how much of the income was declared in my W-2. It also asks the amount for the AMT, which looks to be the gross revenue (number of shares times stock price). It comes out with a very small capital gain that I don't really understand, since I'm not sure why the ISOGN amount on my W-2 isn't the same amount I actually made from the transaction.

The gist of it is that HRBlock is telling me I owe a few thousand dollars less than the other two. How does taxing stock options work? I feel like if it's on my W-2, it should be getting taxed there (and there was no withholding on it, so I expected to pay some amount of taxes on it), but then filling out the Schedule D seems to cause that same amount to be taxed twice.

Men's sizing makes so much more sense.

Oh, I know! I just don't know my inseam and we're just ignoring what my waist measurement is right now, thank you.

it's a quick slap, not a grab. effective and easiest thing to do while both people standing. that or stunguns, you all know how I love a stungun.