Amych, it may also have been the self-satisfied smugness of the one mother who was all, "of course I stay at home! They are my responsibility!"

oh that would have made my head explode

Two things I tell the college seniors in this group I am a part of is to seriously think about and work at meeting mates in college and to not dismiss having children early. Most of them give me the fisheye, but those are still two of my core pieces of advice.

Yeah, but, if I'd married my college boyfriend (and we came close) we would have been miserable. Would I have kids now? Maybe, but what would the cost have been?

"of course I work to bring home money. They are my responsibility."

I get the bothersomeness of it, I own a good and sizeable chuck of partner resentment. I guess I am just in a zen place at the moment - there are sacrifices on all ends and some are easier than others. Some in my family are floored because I gave up a "real" career to be an admin and have no challenging work at my job, but I think it is the best decision I have made since adopting. If I could work from home, I think I would still keep mac in afterschool, because it is the only place he gets socialization.

I am Kat in terms of baggage about fertility and pregnancy in general.

Not quite in that corner, but... yeah. I've got a lot of issues around this topic, too, and that definitely contributes to many of my issues around marriage/relationships.

Yeah, Ms. Stay-At-Home was definitely chokeable; it wasn't just "they're my responsibility", but "nobody else could possibly ever take care of them but me". But beyond that, there was also some heavy-duty subtext in the editing that came across much more in the story than the written version -- the cut from "oh, we got knocked up at 25 and we're giggly and happy and have cooing laughing baby noise in the background" directly to the worst kind of stereotype of "I'm 38 and I hate all those bitches who got pregnant easier than me".

I'm not saying it's not effective editing, mind you -- but it absolutely tilted the on-air story.

I'm not saying it's not effective editing, mind you -- but it absolutely tilted the on-air story.

there's a lot of that going around this week.

amych, I hadn't thought of the editing!

Enh.

msbelle, of course sacrifices are part of the deal. I might be crazy for taking a more intense job next year, but I am doing so in an effort to get closer to home which, ultimately, means I will have more time. I do foresee LOTS more time up after the baby goes to sleep.

This job, for all its faults, including a hideous commute, a lack of direction, clear guidelines or purpose, has been an absolute blessing. I feel ready to go back to real work now.

Three years after finally having a kid, and I *still* get Bitter McBittersoncakes about the whole thing.

I do try to fight the mental stinkeye, but the mental stinkeye is still there when people get pregnant easily.

(It frustrages me that I only got a job with good benefits that would cover treatment and actual maternity leave AFTER I had my one child, too.)

but the mental stinkeye is still there when people get pregnant easily.

Depends on the person. My friend J got pregnant the first month she tried and I was nothing but happy for her (I think it was helped by the fact that she HATED being pregnant and had major buyer's remorse over the whole pregnancy thing. She loves having a kid, but pregnancy is not her cuppa). Then she got pregnant again with twins (naturally) and is happily still working at week 37 and I am jealous of her breeding ability, but am happy she didn't have a similar pregnancy to mine.

Ugh finally got a call back from the lawyer adn she is so frustrating, like she didn't even look back through my file before calling. ANd she proceeded to ask me question after question without giving me a chance to respond. Half of what she asked for, she needs to send me the forms for or find out more information before I can proceed. Sure, I hadn't done much and I neglected to call for 2 months, but she has done NOTHING. I totally snapped at her and took 2 action items for myself and gave her 3. I am calling her ass once a week for an update.

In non breeder news,

I am cleaning out my office (4 more days here... only 4 more days and tomorrow I'm leaving early!). I was thrilled to find a can of aerosol cheese as I didn't pack a lunch. Several calories (and a ton of sodium) later and I'm so happy. No crackers necessary!

edited to make Sox look crazy