Spike's Bitches 40: Buckle Up, Kids! Daddy's Puttin' the Hammer Down.
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
Tep, what everyone else said. DH and I have been together for almost 9 years, living together for almost 5, and we're more roommate-y than not. Most of the time he's downstairs in the man-cave and I'm upstairs in the living room. This way his penchant for video games and Magnum PI marathons in the evening don't interfere with my enjoyment of Dancing With the Stars and BSG. We do watch a lot of hockey together, and the occasional movie sneaks its way in. Guitar Hero has also become a bonding experience for us.
We also learned a long time ago that we go to bed when we go to bed. If it's at the same time (both night owls) then great. If not, that's OK too. Another thing we've discovered is that we cannot spend all of our free time together because it will drive us to divorce. We need the space and some non-shared friends to keep us individually sane.
Good luck with the apartment, sj!
What they all said. 20 years and very roommate-y. Add on top of this the co-worker thing. Almost never go to bed at the same time. But we do sometimes go home for lunch at the same time. ;)
Bonny, one of my dear older friends invented a machine that made bottle brushes quite a few decades ago. He had a machine die manufacturing type business. Someone stole his machine idea and used it to make the first artificial Christmas trees. He didn't know this until a few years later when the machine broke and an unknowing employee called him to see if they could do a repair. He retired on the settlement.
We voted for a larger bed, separate covers and letting go of the notion that touching each other while unconscious means anything more than simple geometry.
DH would be in heaven with the prospect of separate covers. He definitely stakes out his own territory in the bed. It was hard for him to learn to sleep with me because I'm a twin (and my twin and I tended to end up in the same bed for a very long time growing up). I just tend to touch a lot when sleeping. And he prefers not to be touched when he's sleeping. We've managed to work it out very well.
Our mutual understanding of sleeping arrangements and a few games of rock/paper/scissors have saved our marriage.
That and things like NEVER PUTTING DIRTY CLOTHES IN THE HAMPER. AFTER NINETEEN YEARS. Um.
We do our own laundry since we both have set (and very different) ways of washing clothes. We each have a basket in our closets. DH's huge, honking PROBLEM is not putting the damned dishes in the dishwasher. They make it to the sink, but it's so very hard to open the dishwasher door RIGHT NEXT TO THE FREAKIN' SINK to put the dishes in. Um, it agitates me more than it should.
Stephen and I always snuggle for a minute or two, spooning, and then we sprawl. Away from each other.
Wrod. Except I'm not snuggling with Steven. I've got a Rob. It bothered me for a long time that we didn't cuddle all night, but that was unrealistic soap opera/romance novel expectations. Plus, he snores like a symphony of chainsaws, so the farther away his face is from my ears, the less black and blue he's going to be in the morning.
and it seems to me that a live-in relationship ranges from hi, oh yeah we share a bed to hooray the person I love most in the world is here, I must crush them with my love to please vanish for three hours so I can be all by myself and yes, take the cat with you.
Truer words have never been typed.
It bothered me for a long time that we didn't cuddle all night, but that was unrealistic soap opera/romance novel expectations.
Yep. Cuddling all night would also mean getting randomly kicked, or overheating, or something like that. Or someone getting whapped on the head with Clovis.
Stephen and I always snuggle for a minute or two, spooning, and then we sprawl. Away from each other.
Have I mentioned how incredibly weird it is that you have MY NAME and my HUSBAND'S NAME but also apparently MY LIFE? Because, yeah, this, so very true.
He retired on the settlement.
Bless him.
I should be so lucky, but they haven't actually made any money that I know of. That I know of. I suppose I could find that out somehow.
A friend has a friend who's father invented the intermittent windshield wiper. His invention was stolen. 30 years later, after losing his family and his health, he won an enormous settlement and then died a few months later. Very sad.
DH would be in heaven with the prospect of separate covers.
I suggested twin sheets and blankets over a queen/king sized bed and a queen sized cover for show.
Or, better yet, two European duvet/flannel cover combos. That way, individual temperatures are maintained and you could still touch!
a few games of rock/paper/scissors have saved our marriage.
I have deep respect for this problem solving/decision making tool.
Does it hurt your credit score to get a credit card just for the frequent flier miles and cancel it four months later? My dad is always wanting me to do those things.
