Mal ,'War Stories'
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
"Christmas Day, everyone loves you. Then, you wake up on the 26th, just another fat man in a bad suit."
--Detective John Munch.,
I love Emmett, y'all. Not in a creepy "waitin' till he's marryin' age" way, but I think he's great.
Santa...I sorta believed in it, but it's hard when you're a kid who might actually *need* a miracle at her house. I sort of wish my mother had never told me something *quite* so fantastic.
They're reporting now that at least one of the hostages has been released.
Now they're saying both hostages have been released.
Hubby and I went to the doctor this morning. I wish we had separate appointments, but it's more practical for us to share. I had a blood test to check my A1C number, and it was down significantly from last time, though not ideal. Hubby's response was, "Well, not what we want, but better." I got annoyed, feeling like I just go the "Hm, an A. But that could have been an A+, couldn't it?" thing from a parent.
I would have preferred the vindication before the critique, "Hey, better, but it needs to come down." Hubby thinks that's very wrong headed of me--it got very tense for awhile, he hates when I challenge him on anything--because the affirmation should come last so it sticks.
Which order do people prefer to hear that sort of thing, praise mixed with the acknowledgement that more work needs to be done? To me, hearing the negative first feels like the negative is the first thing that comes to mind and the positive is an afterthought.
Praise - you already knew that it had to come down more - so long as it's going down that should be enough. (Like, it went down last time, it's gone down a gain - whoo hoo downward trend.)
Which order do people prefer to hear that sort of thing, praise mixed with the acknowledgement that more work needs to be done? To me, hearing the negative first feels like the negative is the first thing that comes to mind and the positive is an afterthought.
Well, if I'm hearing it from my doctor, then I'd prefer praise and then point out what the next goal should be, and what's a realistic time frame for it, and (if I don't already know) the best way to achieve it.
From anyone else? I'd prefer that they try to remember I'm not a feeble-minded 3-year-old and that I keep close tabs on my health, and I'm well aware of what I might -- or even might NOT -- need to "work on," and that I have a damned good doctor who works with me on these things, and therefore *they* (the non-doctor friend/family member/boyfriend filled with concern that OMGFATKILLS!) don't need to ride herd on my (normal) blood pressure.
(I realize my answer comes from the position of being very touchy about such things, having just discussed them in the past couple of days. Though I *do* mean it.)
Well, if I'm hearing it from my doctor, then I'd prefer praise and then point out what the next goal should be, and what's a realistic time frame for it, and (if I don't already know) the best way to achieve it.
Yes, this. I definitely prefer this method.
I just read an article in Self about how Elizabeth Perkins was diagnosed with Type I diabetes into her 40's and how it had been missed by several doctors who weren't taking her blood tests after meals. She got a glucose level of 690 one afternoon and ended up hospitalized. This has me thinking I should have my doctor do a full work up for diabetes because I really worry about it being missed.
I'd prefer that they try to remember I'm not a feeble-minded 3-year-old and that I keep close tabs on my health, and I'm well aware of what I might -- or even might NOT -- need to "work on," and that I have a damned good doctor who works with me on these things, and therefore *they* (the non-doctor friend/family member/boyfriend filled with concern that OMGFATKILLS!) don't need to ride herd on my (normal) blood pressure.
I should quote that to Hubby. I get the impression that he doesn't really believe I'm a competent adult who is at least as smart as he is. "You shouldn't eat that, it's bad for your blood sugar." No shit! Has it occured to you that I know that damned well and I'm eating it anyway?
He tries to explain it as "I'm just worried about you/I want you to be the best person you can be/I know you want to do as well as possible at this." I had parents, Hubby. I didn't marry you because I missed being "improved."
Damn right, Steph.