Oh, no, poor flamingo! Okay, stuck in a crate in a turnstile. I was having this really upsetting flamingo turnstile visual. But it probably wasn't any fun for the flamingo. I think I'm overreacting to this. I'm pretty sure I must have a latent turnstile phobia.

Nobody ever misspells my name. (eta: although evidently I misspell "ever.")They just think they're going to. But no, my name is spelled just like it sounds. They're always right when they try it. Now, back when I had a mostly Japanese name? It was as if it were a terrifying conglomeration of syllables that no reasonable person should be forced to encounter.

The television show Entertainment Tonight was reporting on its Web site Monday that it has several reliable sources who say the FBI and Los Angeles police are investigating legitimate leads of a contract hit on Kevin Federline's life.

Have they questioned Chris Crocker yet?

I passed a guy dressed like this at a bus stop on my way to my car, and he stared at me. Him! At me! He totally started it.

I apologize in advance to that guy, but I'm totally getting Coming to America from that.

All the Masai on the Eastern Seaboard are now preparing to hunt you down Jesse. They KILL LIONS! WITHOUT GUNS! and you went and called them Eddie Murphy.

K-ville: I was hoping they'd make something out of a guy from Cincy knowing what the neutral ground is. Because at first it made me cock an eyebrow.

I have turnstile phobia! But just for the sort of turnstile that it sounds like this one exactly was. There was (and presumably still is) one on the way out of the Children's Zoo at Brookfield. When I was very small my sister told me that one time somebody tried to come in the wrong way as someone was going out and they kept pushing until... well you get the idea. My little-girl brain conjured a very vivid image that is the reason why I rush through these sorts of turnstiles even today.

There was (and presumably still is) one on the way out of the Children's Zoo at Brookfield.

Okay, that's weird. I got my arm caught in a turnstile at Brookfield Zoo when I was about 8. I haven't hurt myself everywhere in the country. Really.

All the Masai on the Eastern Seaboard are now preparing to hunt you down Jesse. They KILL LIONS! WITHOUT GUNS! and you went and called them Eddie Murphy.

I said I was sorry!

I get freaked out by those glass revolving doors. I want to adhere to 1 person/enclosure, and then there is the luggage issue. I often have to play catch up as people laugh. I think it might be Jesse who can attest to that. Or maybe my brother. I know I got What were you waiting for? from him.