I too love this from the questioner's favorite answer:
And don't mind most of these people- none of them are paying a hundred dollars a plate like you and me. Most of them talk about $10-14 dollar a plate weddings- So I guess their cheap gift is OK. I think it's a social class thing- like they don't know any better.
You know, among my people, we were taught that it was tacky to expect your guests to pay for a party unless you'd pre-arranged something like a potluck meal. It never would've occurred to us to try to balance out the cost of a wedding with the value of the gifts, or to think less of anyone who gave an inexpensive, simple gift. I also learned at my mother's knee that you shouldn't spend beyond your means, and that it if a $10-15/head buffet is what you can afford for your wedding, that's the wedding you should have, because what's important is the marriage, and the love, friendship, and good wishes of the people who come to celebrate with you.
But I am, after all, po' white trash from rural Alabama. Low social class, IOW. It's obvious that I don't know any better.
After attending a wedding recently where guests brought their own beer, to suppliment that provided - I have no idea what is expected anymore.
They did have a HUGE gift table and invited family over the day after the wedding to eat left overs and watch them open the gifts. Is that a new tradition too???
we were taught that it was tacky to expect your guests to pay for a party
Not just rural Alabama.
When I moved to NYC, I tried to get people to stop bringing things when I invited them over for dinner. It was a lost cause.
They did have a HUGE gift table and invited family over the day after the wedding to eat left overs and watch them open the gifts.
My best friend did that. Citing Italian tradition, IIRC. I had to leave the next day, so missed both it and cake.
They did have a HUGE gift table and invited family over the day after the wedding to eat left overs and watch them open the gifts. Is that a new tradition too???
I've heard of this. I will not do it, because I expect that I will be so sick of the people giving me "friendly" advice, I will kill someone.
They did have a HUGE gift table and invited family over the day after the wedding to eat left overs and watch them open the gifts. Is that a new tradition too???
I've been to a bunch of these morning after brunches. Some with gift opening, some without.
I've been to morning after brunches, but not with gift opening!
Does that apply with work or hobby friends, though? This is my second krav wedding, and I do know the bride's brother, but that's because he'd routinely travel in from Colorado to do krav here.
Well, no. That was more traditional. These days obviously there's a lot more adults getting married, and you wouldn't know their family, and their best friend/MoH might live six states away. So, it's not nearly as bad to include in the invite, but I still think it's not really cool. But I still think the one that was about "give us money for our honeymoon at www.honeyluna.com" or something was ridic.
I love the gift opening thing because I always want to see what people get! (I know it's deadly boring for most normal people.) The ones I've been to have been lowkey brunchy things for close friends.
Daisy! Max Cady has a new album! Neat!
SuziQ:
(1) How's your mom today?
(2) So, what did you think of Folsom?
t edit
Lee -- I disremember -- did you go to Folsom too, and if so, was it your first time?
And juliana, O thou veteran of Folsoms past (or, okay, just one) -- what did you think of this year?
