whoa, who gets married on a Monday night?

She is a stage manager, he is the master electrician. Both working in theater. Monday is the day o rest for actors, and vast majority of theaters are dark that night. Since most of their friends work in the biz, it's a safe bet that everyone could attend. Plus, it seems, the venue where the service/reception is was HAPPY to rent it on a Monday. To the point where the bride was getting advice "o, you want to try xxx for the cake, they are much tastier and half the price" and "try the house wine, it's a fraction of the cost, and tasts just fine, especially if you are not wine connoisseur" (which they aren't). She was like "wow, I told them I'm on a budget, and they turn into free wedding planners. It's GREAT!"

As for the sound system. Real basic. Couple speakers on sticks so they can plug an iPod in. Small afair. Like 50 folks or so I think she said.

I love that she thinks that the guests are supposed to pay for the wedding.

Also -- and I know this question reveals my white trash heritage in its full glory -- how is a guest meant to find out how much the reception costs per plate? Without being utterly tactless, that is?

I do remember reading somewhere it was tacky to mention the registry with the invitation, but where else would you?

The tradition is that it's bad manners to expect or ask for gifts for your wedding. But the custom is that everyone has gift regestries and you're just supposed to somehow find out about them. While I do think it's rude to expect gifts or gifts of a certain value it's just an annoying inconvenience that the registry information is never in the invitation where everyone coming to the wedding can see it.

She is a stage manager, he is the master electrician. Both working in theater. Monday is the day o rest for actors, and vast majority of theaters are dark that night.

ah! Perfect for them, then! Also would be good for restaurant people.

and I know this question reveals my white trash heritage in its full glory -- how is a guest meant to find out how much the reception costs per plate?

I don't get why not knowing this would reveal your white trash heritage. I would think that anyone who knew the price per plate at a reception had either asked whoever paid for the wedding or whoever paid told them (both rude) or had been researching wedding costs themselves (which, then would be rude to mention the cost).

it's just an annoying inconvenience that the registry information is never in the invitation where everyone coming to the wedding can see it

That's what I'm thinking.

I mean, I'd really like to know what colour tie this wedding is, so I can plan my dress accordingly. But if I don't bump into the bride, I'm going to wing it. Calling her up in the month before the ceremony to ask questions about it? She needs her own time. I can't imagine the deluge of questions about registries you'd open yourself up to if you hadn't taken the simple opportunity to inform people silently.

people wonder why I need a g/f. It's for stuff like this. Traditions. Hidden traditions. The "right" thing to do. Ugg. Head spinny.

Didn't help talking to my dad last night and he pestering me "who's the lil lady dragging me to a wedding" Um. I'm going to celebrate a friend getting hitched. "well, guys only go if a lady is dragging him, it's a subtle hint, see, this is what I want from you... so... who's the lady??" I'm going stag dad. "nonsense, then why would you go?" :: head -> table ::

Thanks gang. Y'all made the blood pressure simmer down from moment of panic. LOVE YOU ALL!!!! OK, now I should get on the road and pick up sound system, and head down before traffic gets bad.

whoa, who gets married on a Monday night?

She is a stage manager, he is the master electrician.

That's what I was thinking. (Theater people, not the exact jobs.) I've been to a few Monday night weddings. Mine was on the Saturday after Fringe, which is a traditional hiatus in MSP.

We just registered at Target and Marshall Field's, on the basis that everyone in MN assumes you register there. Our parents took care of informing the relatives.

Seriously, if I do get married again - my preference would be city hall with a small party afterwards. So much to deal with otherwise!

"nonsense, then why would you go?"

To pick up on the single women made desperate by losing yet another of their number.

Fish in a barrel, my friend.

(I do remember reading somewhere it was tacky to mention the registry with the invitation, but where else would you?)

Well, in theory, if you're invited to the wedding you should know the couple or their family well enough to ask someone (like the bride's mother or maid of honor or something) if they are registered somewhere.

I think these days it's nice if it doesn't come with the invitation, but often couples have websites now, and provided it's not on the front page, I think that's a good place to put it...

Fish in a barrel, my friend.

Seriously.

I don't think there will be a single eligible dude at either wedding I'm going to this weekend.