paperdol, if you don't have a friend who can drive you and help you keep calm, can you find one to act as a personal shopper? or find a store that'll help you - I know some have personal shoppers who'll help at no additional charge. Failing that, maybe look online and see if you can get some ideas, pick up stuff, try it on at home, and return what doesn't work.

Paperdol-- You have NO sense of how you actually look, so you need to get someone to shop with you. I love shopping for people, so I could do that sometime this week--just not today or Tuesday. E me if you want me to go to Macy's (or wherever) with you.

paperdol, you've got a cute dress, right? (I seem to remember you talking about a cute polka-dot dress.) Go get some new fun flats and a new black cardigan to wear with the dress.

Or, if you want, you can call me while you're shopping and I'll be the disembodied voice trying to calm you down.

Okay, general shopping rules, a la Stacy and Clinton:

Try stuff on, even if you don't think it will look good on you. Sometimes things look completely different on the hanger.

Find something that emphasizes the narrowest part of you (and if you say you don't have one, I'll smack you).

If you're going to be in black, maybe have some fun with accessories, including your shoes.

I have got to stop reading the DMN editorial blog. The paper is fairly conservative with maybe 2 true liberals, and then everyone else is center to far right. It's inevitable that some of their shit is going to get up my nose, but this post from today's Topic of the Day has me shaking mad.

Re: TD: What does America owe New Orleans?

I'm not sure how to answer this, except to say that I was there the night Nagin won re-election. I was just visiting, because I felt I wanted to help pump some tourism dollars back into the New Orleans economy. Ever since then, and given some of the bad publicity, I just don't feel like I care as much. Some of the people displaced by Katrina are still relying on my tax dollars to eek out a living, and they will always be on the dole. Fine. The New Orleans city leaders can't seem to focus their energy to make the city center safe and to spark targeted redevelopment. Whatever. I am just not sure I care anymore ... They've lost me.

I was going to chime in and say that if you can't bring someone with you to be the voice of sanity, you definitely need to bring Stacy and Clinton with you in your brain.

I've had several disastrous clothing expeditions for weddings this year, so I know how it feels. I miss how clothes used to fit back when I was almost thin.

I got this skirt, which is right at my knees.

But now i need a top, and there's nothing that can go on the top half of my body that isn't depressing or cry inducing. I have a pile of plain black tshirts and I wear one just about everyday, so I don't have to think about it, or be upset on a daily basis.

Thanks for the advice, y'all. I'm going to try the deep breath and run into Macy's. Also taking Dana's advice to spend no more than an hour in the store.

DJ, my family has this bitter joke now, every time some sort of natural disaster happens. Ohio floods, wildfires in the Midwest, whatever, and our response is "I don't think they should rebuild there. It's obviously too dangerous. I don't want my tax money going to support them."

I got this skirt, which is right at my knees.

Cute! Okay, wear that with a fitted black or white t-shirt, and some sort of interesting cardigan over it: [link] or [link]

DJ, my family has this bitter joke now, every time some sort of natural disaster happens. Ohio floods, wildfires in the Midwest, whatever, and our response is "I don't think they should rebuild there. It's obviously too dangerous. I don't want my tax money going to support them."

Yeah. I mean, the Earth has enough gravitational attraction that it's constantly sucking in comets and meteors and what-not from the rest of the solar system. Obviously very dangerous - I don't know why anyone lives on Earth....