I'm worried about Stephanie, too.

I'm also appalled at myself because I found Spike almost likable tonight.

And Richard's comment about going home to make little Blaises was made of WIN.

What Amy said.

Edit: Aw! I'm bummed out, but glad it wasn't Steph!

Me, too! Poor Markwise.

Wow. Next week looks hardcore.

Dear Bravo,

People with families of 4 to feed on a $10 budget? Do not shop at Whole Foods.

Love, The Real World

Oh yeah, I was totally going to say that. I can get four meals out of $5 at my normal grocery store! Not Top Chef quality, but whatever.

::sits with Jessica::

Stephen and I shouted the SAME THING at the TV.

People with families of 4 to feed on a $10 budget? Do not shop at Whole Foods.

SERIOUSLY. That was my big "Whu-huh???!???!!" I mean, someone was using parmesan. Can you even buy parmesan at whole foods that even a sliver of wouldn't bust at least half your budget?

I gotta say, though, for a bunch of whiny prima donnas, they all seemed really good with the kids. I know part of that's editing, but I can't believe they didn't have at least one serious W.C. Fields type in the bunch. I mean, I'm not surprised Crazy Andy is the one who got his kid injured (albeit slightly) but he handled it REALLY well.

There are some folks who've been kicked off that I would have been entertained to see interact with the kids, though, in a train wreck sort of way.

I thought Spike's kid was the one who peeled his finger.

I thought Spike's kid was the one who peeled his finger.

Yeah, you're right. For some reason I remember Andrew doing the carrot soup, but he made the top 3 with the palliard chicken and the fennel salad.

Why doesn't Spike wear the (stupid fucking) hat when it's useful, dammit?

Blah, razzin' frazzin' trainings made me miss live posting about Idol. So sad. So here goes my very late musings. I'll tackle performance night first. Overall, I was deeply underwhelmed by Neil Diamond night.

Syesha Mercado – Hello Again

Y’all, she can really sing. Who knew? The beginning was very sweet and . . . almost subtle. Even the scream-y parts are not as scream-y as they could’ve been. She is having some pitch challenges, yes, especially in her lower register. But overall it was quite lovely and restrained. Who are you, again? Also, thank you for finding someone who knows how to work a pressing comb. If you’re going to insist on straightening her hair, at least make Madame CJ proud.

Syesha, Part Two - Thank the Lord for the Night Time

Hmm, taking it up tempo for the second song. Ok. This is sassy. You know, Syesha really does a lot better on the jazzy, fun numbers. She is just a teeny bit under the pitch again, but still . . . this is fun. But also kind of reminiscent of some Sister Act II outtake, you know, where the kids are rehearsing with Whoppi for the big concert and the one singer who didn’t go on to become Lauren Hill got her solo? And then the director cut it because it just wasn’t all that overwhelming? Yeah, it was kinda like that. Competent, but nothing to shout about.

David Archuleta – Sweet Caroline

Yuck. I should’ve known D’Archie would pick one of my least favorite ND songs. And the thought of D’Archie singing this song about/to Caroline Kennedy is making me need a Tums. Eeeww. Well, let’s see what happens. Ugh. He is in very bad voice this evening. That first note was a crime against music. He is really scraping the bottom of his lower register AGAIN. Well, this confirms my long held belief that teenage boys, even ones as good as I generally think D’Archie is, are not made for this competition. Just no. His voice sounds foul, y’all. He needs to go somewhere and drink hot tea with honey and mint for a week and not talk. There were so, so many rank notes there. Sigh. Poor D’Archie. It’s like he’s trying to ruin the David/David finale of Nigel’s dreams.

D'Archie, Part 2 - America

I can’t, y’all. I just don’t think I can. See my earlier rant about Kristy Lee when she sang Lee Greenwood. And it’s just twenty million times as gross here because you know his Svengali, child-eating, stage father pushed this song on him as a way to grab votes in a week where his voice finally just gave up the ghost. Aren’t there laws against this sort of thing? Really? This is like some Triangle Shirtwaist fire level shit. Let this poor child go home. That third “They're coming to America” in or so? Painful. Yuck. I hate everything about this performance. Poor noodle.

Brooke White – I’m A Believer

Wow. I actually think this is a really excellent song choice for her, but with her state of mind the last couple of weeks, who knows if she can really pull it off. Let’s find out! Well, she started the song out way too low, so consequently she is hella flat. And sounds like absolute shite. Oh god, y’all. This is so decidedly not good. Just out of tune and warbly. Ugh. I love me some Brooke White, but please everyone, let’s send this girl home. She just does not have the stuff to win. This is bad. Painful bad. All the “woos” in the world won’t help (and just bring up unfortunate Taylor Hicks memories, which I’m certain is not what she was going for)

Brooke, Part 2 - I am, I said

I’ve never understood or particularly cared for this song, but I’m having a hard time thinking how it could be any worse than the last one. So, let’s give it a whirl. She usually does a little better with a piano accompaniment. And she started off at least closer to the key. Yes, this is better. However, just as I remembered, this song is strange and off putting. I’m bored by the performance, but at least she’s singing it better than the first. Yawn.

David Cook – I’m Alive

Sigh. Most of them have (continued...)