Wait, Amy is in the bottom? And Jasmine and Aaron aren't? What show did those people watch?

And the judges send Nico to safety?! WTF? I mean, if they were going to get rid of Tucker automatically that would be one thing, but I don't think that makes sense. Silly judges. I'm hoping and praying this means Malice is going home (I know that's not how she spells her name, but…) Ooh, liked Amy's solo. Different. I admit, I like how Malice looks on stage--her spindly little limbs come off neat. And yet…no. Oh, Alan, I can't hear this song without thinking of SYTYCD…but better than you are. Even though you're trying very hard. Ballroom dancers are so handicapped by this format.

Nico/Haley Broadway: Dang, that lift was cool but the leadup to it was so awkward it wasn't worth it.

Alan/Malece Jazz: You've never seen Gene Kelley? I buy never having seen a whole movie, but…clips? You're a 19 year old DANCER, dude. THe dance is cute, but I just dislike her so much I don't want to watch.

Jenna/ALEX WONG! paso doble: OK, but …he's not a latin dancer. So that's a little random. Though accurate, I suppose, since neither is Tucker. Damn, Alex has a pretty chest. But some of those slights looked slightly awkward. Honestly, I have no idea how good that was or not because I was all 'Squee! Alex!" (I liked the last lift/twirl).

Mackenzie/Paul-contemp: Mandy being non-80s! There's a little more REACH FOR NOTHING in the choreo than I'd prefer, but I like it. Helps that I like the song. And the last few seconds were great. Paul is definitely growing on me.

Amy/Fikshun-waltz: Well at least they're dancing to a song that's actually in 3/4 time. Some of the waltzes on this show are to terrible music. Amy's costume is awful. But they're still adorable, even waltzing. Dang, so cute!

Aaron/Jasmine-hiphop: Wait, I actually like this. Even though it's NappyTab. Is there something wrong with me? There's a few moments where he's not selling it, but mostly it's good. And I don't hate the choreo. WTF?

Guys number: Meh. I definitely hate the "flannel tied around waist" look, take it back 1990s!

Girls number: I hate Malice even more for using the word "impactful". This is cool but I kinda want to watch it be danced by older women…in their 30s or 40s. Less "I'm 18 so CLEARLY I'm young and beautiful now!" and more poignant. Hmm.

YAY Malice going home! But Alan? Huh. Weird. OK.

And now reading y'alls reactions:

What the hell kind of dancer has never seen Gene Kelly? BLASPHEMY!!!

HAHAH. Exactly.

I so miss the first season, when the intros were all explanations of the style and how you did it properly. And then the couples just danced, generally without props or back story.

Yeah, I'd love to see them explain some of the footwork and shit (and maybe show professionals doing it). And less story. Sometimes it's good but it's too much.

I liked the Bollywood opening number. I mean, I couldn't tell you if it was a particularly good one, but I always like it when there's a whole stage full of people dancing that style.

What the hell kind of dancer has never seen Gene Kelly? BLASPHEMY!!!

That was shocking! He must have hit Youtube sometime during the week, though, because he did pretty well in trying to move like Gene Kelly

Cat's dress was also not good. It looked like swinging '60s London but cutesy or something.

Agreed. The bow and the gathers of the skirt so did not work.

Alex Fucking Wong!

Yes, I read y'all's exclamations above and knew he'd be on, but still.

OK, but …he's not a latin dancer. So that's a little random.

I think it's a matter of anywhere they could fit him, and I am grateful. I have no idea how Jenna danced, though, 'cause I was just watching him. Such a delight.

And she's a ballroom girl, maybe even Latin, isn't she? Perhaps it was decided that having hr dance with another ballroom dancer would be too much at this stage of the game.

Hey, there's some rise and fall in that Viennese waltz! That might be all I need.

Aaron/Jasmine-hiphop: Wait, I actually like this. Even though it's NappyTab. Is there something wrong with me? There's a few moments where he's not selling it, but mostly it's good. And I don't hate the choreo. WTF?

Right? That was way better than I expected.

Mmm, I'm with Amy on the Man's World dance. I kind of expected to hate it from the description, but the actual dance I liked very much.

And I rather like the flannel. Mmm, grunge.

I hate Malice even more for using the word "impactful".

HAHAHAHA! I love that you said that, meara. But it wasn't Malece who said impactful. To be honest, I don't know which brunette said it, maybe Mackenzie? No Jenna, I think it was Jenna.

Top Chef: Damn, that quickfire is harsh! Kinda brilliant.

Eta: and I'm intrigued by the coffee/granola/venison thing. Clever!

the sous chef thing really makes me laugh with Bryan Voltaggio. MFNLaw and I go to Volt all of the time and see his sous chef in the kitchen. there's a camera in the kitchen and they will set the TV in the bar to the kitchen.

Cool!