Do the men say, "smile!"?

And some of the women. Women, of course, are supposed to be naturally cheerful and friendly. If you don't smile, there's obviously something wrong with you.

(Wow, you guys are hitting so many of my buttons in sequence, it's almost fun. Next, we should talk about guys who show up in LJ communities and explain to the womenfolk why slash is stupid.)

Women, of course, are supposed to be naturally cheerful and friendly.

Or at least decorative. Bleagh.

I wonder how often our lovely Buffista guys feel like they're walking on landmines. I'd blame PMS, but that feels like a cop-out the way telling a shrink "it's my mother's fault" is a cop-out.

Women, of course, are supposed to be naturally cheerful and friendly. If you don't smile, there's obviously something wrong with you.

If you're fat and don't smile, it's assumed you're a useless asexual lump--at least if you smile, you're a "jolly girl!"

Whenever Person A tries to make a generalized point about a group of people with a common characteristic, Person B invariably comes in and says "No, *I* know a woman from Cuba, and SHE loves to break-dance, so clearly you are wrong about Cuban dance!"

::hangs head::

I knew what you were saying. I was trying to make the leetle joke, but of course without your being able to see my face, it didn't come across.

I wonder how often our lovely Buffista guys feel like they're walking on landmines.

Not me. But I used to feel that way in college a lot....

Do the men say, "smile!"?

This ones drives me crazy. I am neutral-to-friendly to strangers, depending on my mood. If I'm having a good day, I'm going to probably smile at small and fuzzy things, be all birds and flowers and one with humanity and shit. (It's really kind of freaky.) So that's my inclination. So when blasted with "smile" I do cause it really isn't that far away from my mind and then promptly start scowling and get all pissed off and hate the world.

Actually, the more time I spend around Buffistas, the less I feel like I'm walking on landmines. Being here helps me become more aware of the things I say and do, and how that's perceived by others.

And also, I don't feel like I have the mentality you're speaking of, so I don't feel like you're trashing a group that include me, and thus me by association, so again, no landmines.

I wonder how often our lovely Buffista guys feel like they're walking on landmines.

I don't want to be a bitch, but I guess I'm going to be one anyway.

If a guy -- Buffista or no -- assumes that he knows what it's like to be a woman, that he knows better than I do (although I'm actually the gender in question) what cultural standards apply to women, well, I'm going to be cranky about it.