enh. no worries, sara. It's what made me think of the dolphin. I blame lisah for that knowledge.

I didn't really get physically punished much as a kid, which was due to a mix of being quiet and well-behaved (my, how times change on that last!) and my mom making clear to my dad that the style of whippings he and his siblings had routinely earned back in the 1940s would not fly in her house. Apparently, there was an incident when I was a toddler that revealed both their differing takes on corporal punishment and the previously unsuspected fact that Mom's meek exterior concealed a lose-your-shit-and-fuck-people-up temper like unto Krakatoa.

I'm sorry Mac has hit that stage, msbelle. I hope it's relatively short lived.

I was actually a fairly good kid, at least as far as my parents knew.

My parents yelled, and I'm sure I got "selfish brat" many a time, nearly all deserved. I was pretty self-aware as a kid. though. I think there's a big difference in impact if it's coming out of nowhere, or for really just being a kid, as opposed to when you knew all along that you were pushing it. The few times I got in the shit when it wasn't deserved I reacted with rightous outrage that knew no bounds. Or time limits, apparently.

We got spanked, for sure, if it was something really bad. Or if we lied about it. But the only memory that sticks with me clearly was the day when, mid-spanking, complete with hysterical shrieking and all, I had a revelation: this doesn't actually hurt that much.

Whoa, no stopping me then.

I'm 31 years old, and my mom still apologizes for swatting me during a diaper change when I was two-ish. Like I recall, or don't sympathize after nannying (note: I don't swat. Not my thing.) I do recall a swat when I was three-ish. I leaped on dad and spilled scaulding coffee on us both. It was totally panic. OTOH, I clipped dad's cornea with a toenail not much later on a camping trip. All I recall was the drive to the hospital.

I don't think spanking is inherently bad, I just know it is not my approach, nor my parents'. I'm extremely bad at hitting. Brother and I rarely came to blows and when we did, it was just wrong.

Of course, this kinda freaks me out with respect to self defense. I don't scream, I don't yell, I don't hit. Hrm.

I got whacked some when I was a kid. Most of the time, it was because I'd done something terribly stupid (like poke a run over rattler with a stick to "see if it was really dead.") A couple of times, it was just me being a smart-mouthed little bitca.

Spankings, not beatings. I think the last time a parent laid a hand on me, I was about 11 or 12 and mouthed off to my dad, and he slapped me. Since I get my temper from him, I'm just surprised he was able to step back from me. After that age, it was all groundings and revocation of privleges. Or extra housework. Ugh. I'd rather be slapped.

I remember getting into a HUGE fight with my mom the summer after freshman year of college. Ended up me telling her to fuck off, or fuck you -- I cant remember, and she booted me from the house. I was almost 19, and camped out on my friend's floor for a month, but I slunk back home and apologized in about a week.

I remember getting a few spankings, but all but one of them were deserved and matched the severity of the infraction pretty well. And I recall accidentally racking Dad with no punishment afterwards, so I'll trade him for the one case of discipline overkill I can recall.

I'm less quick to forgive the unpredictable angry snaps for looking at him the wrong way or innocently saying something that annoyed him.

Oh yeah, my mom slapped me across the face once. For something that was an accident, though caused in part by carelessness on my part. I think we were both shocked and horrified. Her more than me.

Which (including the last post) is a long way of saying that I think things were generally pretty well suited to the crime, as Matt say, if only based on the fact that I remember the exceptions so well.

Also, just FTR, he hit me with the brush first so I don't see why I was the only one to get yelled at. FTR.

Mom and Dad were pretty careful to explain why I was getting spanked, and usually because of something I did that could have hurt me or someone else.

And many times before or after a spanking I would hear "I love you, but I don't like the way you act right now."

And the always horrible "I'm disappointed in you."

ACK.

As a young child I was never spanked. My father was told to spank me, but he would pretend to and then tell me to go cry like I had been.

Other than that, I was pretty good during what would have been the spanking years. Teenage years with just me and mom were horrible. We were just awful to each other. Screaming fights, me leaving, her locking me out. I remember being smacked across the face for something particularly horrid I said to her once, something about that if people thought I was a whore it was because I learned it from her.

I left home at 18 and never, even while I was sleeping on couches, thought about going back. after a couple of years away though, we got really close. Now when stuff upsets me I always say I want my mom. When I go home to visit, sometimes she'll give me a bag or box of clothes. When I get back to Dallas I take them out one item a day and smell them. Sometimes if it's been particularly bad, I'll sleep with them.

We love each other, but it's pretty clear we should not be in the same household for too long.