pauses in hacking route through rosebush to front door

"Huh. Was that Am-Chau?"

resumes chainsawing

Ow! I yank my head from the door. Okay, that was not the radio.

I set my things securely on the porch, then I remember something about the, um, mutable nature of Am-Chau's house. Maybe the coffees would be safer on the ground.

Trying the door only brings more yelling. There is, however, a window half-open.

"I'm sure she wouldn't mind a little B and E in a good cause," I mutter.

//Of course not// says a voice in my flipping head. Sometimes this place drives me nuts.

I take a run at the window and manage to get my head and shoulders inside. My backside is hanging out in a most undignified manner. Yanking and wriggling gets me mostly inside and then. . .

Ow. Again.

"Am-Chau?"

"I'm here. Get a rope."

"I'm here. Get a rope."

Sums up so much of life's little adventures.

I have rope. Well, twine. It should be strong enough - certainly worth a shot, anyway - I'll just double it a few times for safety.

No I just need a little weight. Aha! This coffee mug should do nicely. I attach the anchor end to the door knob, which seems secure.

"Am-Chau, I'm lowering the rope now. You should hear a coffee mug scraping on the side of the hole."

"My Edward Gorey coffee mug?" Am-Chau's priorities appear to be a bit off.

"Um. Not sure."

"Okay, can't be helped. Does it have coffee in it?" I ask, hopefully.

"I left the coffee outside, you can have it as soon as I haul you up."

I take off my shoes and socks to give myself traction for when Am-Chau is within grabbing distance. As I stare into the black pit, I feel a gentle pressure on my elbow. I leap several inches from the floor; difficult to do from a sitting position.

"Um. Am-Chau. Is there supposed to be a... a... an otherworldly creature thingy here? If not, what should I do?"

"Um..." What's she on about? Otherworldly creature indeed... oh! "Jossica, please leave Penny alone!"

The dragonabbit shows no sign of wanting to do anything other than sniff Penny, but this isn't helping me get out of the hole.

"Just shoo her away," I tell Penny. "She's not very... well, I don't think she's very dangerous. I'm still alive and we had breakfast together."

The dragonrabbit makes bambi eyes at me and licks my chin. I smell sulphur and lettuce on her breath. Am-Chau has found the cup and is hauling herself out of the hole.

"Give me a little space, um, Jossica, I need to help Am-Chau."

I peer over the edge. Jossica decides to "help" by planting her feet on my ass to keep me from falling in. How did this happen, anyway? Am-Chau is in view and nearly in reach. I grab the twine with one hand and reach down with another. Am-Chau grasps my hand and in a minute we are both sprawled on the floor. Jossica starts running in tiny circles punctuated by frequent leaps straight up. I had a dog that used to do that. Heh.

"Thanks, Penny," I say, once I've got my breath back. "It's lucky you came by. Did Edward find you?"

I decide to strategically ignore Jossica for the time being. What else can one do when mystcial beasts behave like pets?

One can drink more coffee, for starters.

Penny hasn't answered my question about Edward, but I keep talking anyway. "More importantly, where's the coffee?"

Am-Chau seems a bit overwrought, and one can hardly blame her. I leave her on the couch while I retrive the lattes. Am-Chau pours hers into the Edward Gorey mug which still has a bit of string on the handle. Taking the tactful route, I refrain from asking about the big hole in the floor. Instead, I hold up the flyer from the new Evil Emporium.

Am-Chau utters a phrase in a foreign tongue. I don't know what it means, but it causes Jossica to lower her ears.