I'm very bad at conflict. This is why I tend to stay out of most policy discussions, and why I'm an advocate for the MARCIE filter.

Liz, your reaction is as valid as anyone's. But, forgive me, not more valid. A number of reactions matched yours, though, which is why I didn't say anything while everything was blowing up. The process worked. As much as many people regret it, we're part of a larger world now and more and more of the hoi polloi will be coming in. I thought a couple of times of sending a private email saying, "Look, they're not getting it, if there's a sincere, non-snarky apology in your repertoire, best bring it out."

I am not accusing anyone of overreacting, I hope that's clear. I just wanted to put in one voice for the contrarian point of view. I fear a fortress mentality here above all things. This isn't our safe little world anymore. Many good folks have shown up. Some of the regulars who show up may never fit in completely well. It's a good thing.

BTW, did we decide on the title for the next Bitches thread?

It was down to two. We should take it to Bitches and check. There are, what, four of us there? Should make the decision easy.

And the Deep Of The Night Thread Namers ride again!

I'm all for being an elitist prick. That's just me, though. I like Kat's theory of community stock.

Veteran Buffistas have earned their status by being respectful, funny, thoughtful, kickass, one post at a time, over a lot of time. It's how you introduce yourself, how you make friends.

I feel like veterans have earned a higher degree of respect than the ordinary respect we hand out at the front door to anyone who walks in and says, "yo, hi, I'm a newbie, and these are my thoughts on the current discussion."

I didn't owe Schmoker the same respect and benefit of the doubt that I owe ita, who has shared far more razor sharp jabs with Shawn than the twisted panties comment. I have background knowledge that ita and Shawn go way back, and genuinely like each other, they are friends.

Schmoker did not establish that, didn't even know that Shawn isn't male.

Coming into a new community means being on your best behavior, being polite, getting to know people, earning your stock. Have to earn it.

Liz, your reaction is as valid as anyone's. But, forgive me, not more valid.

Oh, god, no, I'd never meant to say that! I'm very upset I came across that way to you. This is my Buffista opinion on what is happening. That is all. I have no delusions that my word does, or should, carry huge weight. (I thought I'd laced my speeches with enough datives of subjectivity, as it were, the "seems to me" and "I believe that", that that was clear. Oh, oh dear.) If my repetitive yammering about what I think makes me appear to believe I've got any sort of greater authority than anybody else, *please* shut me up. As I shall.

BTW, did we decide on the title for the next Bitches thread?

I don't think there was any conclusivity. (Look at that word! I made it up.)

And on this, as in many other things, Allyson, I shall have to respectfully disagree.

{{{{Liz}}}} Forgive me, I skimmed. My bad. But what do you expect from someone who is too cowardly to attempt Joyce?

And on this, as in many other things, Allyson, I shall have to respectfully disagree.

It's the "respectfully" part that means that I'll have a beer with you and talk about what our opinions are and why we have them.