Hey all. I'm about the same. Still in pain, still exhausted. And they still don't know what is wrong with me. After twenty million tests, the best they have come up with is mild irritable bowel (which I've had for years, so no surprise there) and a slightly irregular pap smear. My doctor is starting me on some new medication today- something that is supposed to calm the IBS and treat chronic pain. Basically, from what I can gather, she has no idea what's wrong so she is throwing some drugs at me to keep me quiet. I have become completely disillisioned with the medical system, and have decided I'm just going to have to learn to live this way. Grrr.

BUT! I have cookies! And they are so super yummy that I can't help but feel happy. Thank you msbelle!!!!!!

I'm still not working full hours, and when I am online I try to focus on getting some work done before I need another nap. So don't look for me to be around so much, but know that I love you all and are wishing everyone the best holiday ever!

I'm not sure how much I'm going to be around. I may be blinking in and out.

Tonight at about 6, Mom called from Minn. She, my stepdad and stepsisters were told it was time they all came up there. LB seems to be losing his fight.

I'm pretty much staying by the phone for when mom calls, or to call her if I start to feel anxious.

I'm kinda reading and may be posting, since Buffista wit and wisdom are a source of comfort. I appreciate everyone's well wishes, prayers and vibes.

I'll be on the road and dark until the 16th. I expect to be doing much skipping and skimming upon my return.

I do not reccomend finals week to anyone. Especially when you have to move out of your dorm room by the end of finals week. It has been crazycrazy for the past two weeks, and it shows no signs of stopping.

Anyway, the long and short of it is I'm packing my ass off and I'll be going home December 13th; I should be home that evening, and if I'm not completely unconscious, I'll check in.

Jesus, we have a lot of shit.

Some good news, finally: I'm quitting my job and going back to school! Starting next month I'll be taking some catch-up science classes and then in September I start nursing school.

My immediate plan is to get RN certification the quickest and cheapest way possible--an associate's program at a local community college. I should be eligible to sit for the NCLEX-RN licensing exam in about a year and a half.

Plans after that are amorphous. I want to continue on to certification as a women's health nurse practitioner (and thus be qualified to provide primary and ob/gyn care to healthy women), but I'm not sure when or where. There are a lot of RN -> NP programs out there, so cost and location (theirs and mine!) will probably be the deciding factors.

I have a job interview next Wednesday for a part-time unit coordinator position on the labor/birth/delivery floor of a major hospital, so I can work and get a bit of experience with women's health while I'm in school.

My last day at my current job is 1/10/2003.

Full speed ahead!

My grandfather was not released. He almost passed out after his PT yesterday and blood tests revealed that his count was severly low. They thought there was bleeding in his stomach but tests today didn't show any. They don't know anything. They just keep giving him blood units. He's had 3 so far.

19 days til the end of this horrid, horrid year.

Can't talk now, lots to do and organise, but I wanted you guys to be the first -- who wants to see a picture of a married couple?

In the midst of the wave of generosity and support going on in the Firefly thread, a letter just came from my mom's former employer. She worked at Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago, and we've just found out that there has been more than $20,000 donated in her name to the hospital's programs. People are just so fucking amazing sometimes.