I can't BELIEVE I'm the first one with this.

KristinT: 1. I can make my own gift baskets with doodads and pretties! It's fun!
2. Shrink wrap can be almost as addictive as bubble wrap, especially since it requires tools to use.
3. Shrink wrap by the roll, however, is not quite wide enough to gather at the top.
4. It really bugs me when I can't gather shrink wrap at the top.
5. Shrink wrap specifically made for baskets is great and really fits!
6. ...however, it also tends to tear open at the seams.
7. Trying to "patch" a shrink wrap gap with another piece of shrink wrap seems like a brilliant idea, but isn't.
8. No matter how long you hover a hairdryer over those two seperate edges, the shrink wrap will not melt together; instead, it will shrink like a penis in a pool, leaving two jagged plastic edges that flap away from the side of the basket, tauntingly.
9. One cannot melt the shrink wrap onto the basket, either.
10. Screaming, "SHRINK TOGETHER, YOU BASTARD!" does not, in fact, help.
11. Michael's Crafts is open until 10PM during the holiday season.
12. It may be best for perfectionists to stay away from shrink wrap unless they've taken their meds.

And to all a good night.

[Edited to match edits KristinT made in-thread]

Damn, Betsy beat me to it.

wishes she could COMM COMM

instead, it will shrink like a penis in a pool, leaving two jagged edges that flap away from the edges of the basket tauntingly.

I am never going into a pool again.

From Natter

billytea:

I smell bullshit consensus.

aurelia:

Did you check the bottom of your shoe?

unknown Buffista was Billytea.

Thank you!

For those in the know, from Lilty in Firefly:

I've now watched about 10 seconds of 'Trash'. I'd like to report that it is a very good episode indeed.

Sheryl :

Perhaps I have odd standards of tastefulness, but I'm finding far too many houses around here decorated in what I call the "Put the lights down and back away slowly" style of Xmas decoration.

Billytea goes house hunting in Bitches -

Oh, and a couple of observations from ploughing through the marketing material:

"Only the lucky few will get to enjoy this opportunity" does not so much say 'dream home' as 'teen slasher movie'.

A laps pool can be a selling point. Having three large, rectangular pillars embedded in it just makes it look like you're trying to cull the pretentious. Or encouraging water pistol fights.

Advertising a property as having "three or more toilets" can have no good explanation:

1. The builder suffered from a bizarre combination of obsessive-compulsive disorder and anal fixation.
2. The agent keeps losing her place every time she counts past two.
3. The agent takes an avant-garde approach to function. "Well, I guess you could use this in a pinch..."