In Chaka Khan:

Jesse: OK, this is completely random (well, not to me), but does anyone have any ideas where I could get my hands on a karaoke recording of "What Would Brian Boitano Do?"?

Lilty Cash: Jesse, if you do find it, let me know. I, ironically enough, have been looking for one as well. Likely for different reasons. Unless yours has something to do with replacing the words 'Brian Boitano' with 'Johnny Damon', and then making a music video. Then, we are soulmates.

Raquel: After the Heathen Wars of 2006, the US is split into Heathen Pockets (the Northeast Corridor and West Coast) and Fundy Pockets (everything else). The Heathens begin construction of Low-Orbit geosychroneous stations, planning to Get the Hell Out of Dodge, but this takes time. Meanwhile, Fundies in the center of the former US find themselves living in an economic dustbowl, and crops begin rotting in the fields. No longer believing in evolution, family planning, or a spherical earth, they quickly begin to overpopulate and yet are scared to leave the new dustbowl (termed "Damnation Alley" by the Heathens) because they might fall off the edge of the earth, or be forced into sodomy with non-whites. Eventually the middle states decline into human sacrifice, with daily blood offerings to Jehovah.

The Heathen Zones fare little better. Refugees of Heathens from the Fundy Zone stream in daily, overloading the cities and fighting for scarce resources. "Will Sell iPod for Food" signs are seen on every corner. The southern tip of Florida declares its indepedence from the concept of "nation" and incorporates as the first Constitutional MegaCorp. Seattle looks ready to follow suit. Government is abandoned in favor of "Lodge Meetings," but these have no ability to enforce the few decisions made at them. Corporate arcologies begin appearing, their Employee Handbooks taking the place of the American Consitution. The Heathens are split between the liberal activists, who continue to oppose the corporations' environmental policies but live in near anarchy, eating nutri-paste; and the Engineers, who are mainly people of color with educations, trying to provide for their families in the coffin-size rooms of arcologies.

Oddly, Top 40 music, network sitcoms, and fashion magazines are still regularly available.

(Trudy, I was coming here to see if I could post that. Curse your fast wee fingers!)

Beej made me laugh

Me: Also, it makes it against the law to use technology to skip commercials.

Beej: That's it. The handbasket to Hell is officially on fire. That's right. We're going to Hell in a FLAMING hand basket.

Thanks Tommyrot. I feel very well informed by you.

Of course the information makes me want to open a vein, but still...informed.

In Natter:

Betsy: Ooh! I know where to get a trebuchet!

tommyrot: Ye Olde eBay?

Lyra Jane: (Office paranoia; Are you the Brynn who sits right across from me at work and just went for a walk? If so, hi, and let us never speak of it again.)

Emily - I'm sorry, what did I miss? Is someone getting married in base 8?

Polter-Cow - Dude, once you get to base 8, you'd damn well better be married.

Natter:

msbelle: I CAN'T FIND MY CELLPHONE! It's been almost 24 hours since I remember seeing it! ACK!

Daniel C. Jensen: Call it.

Betsy HP: Heads.

Polter-Cow: Who do you think you are, Betsy, Rosencrantz?

Contextless, in Natter 30:

Theodosia: Tip #1 for Determining if your Doctor is an ENT or an Ent: He says, "Hoom Hoom" instead of "Hmmmmmm."

Theodosia: Tip #2 for Determining if your Doctor is an ENT or an Ent: He keeps suggesting you get vaccinated for Dutch Elm Disease "just in case."

Kathy Anstrom: Tip #3: He says he's married, but he's conveniently lost her, so he hits on you.