Ok, I think I've fixed our technical problem now.
That just tore it. “Me.” I said, and put that stiletto where it would do maximum damage, thinking all the while “What is this? National Nad-Kicking Month?” But I didn’t live to put up with that. Then there was a noise from the ceiling as the tiles crumpled and Munch fell into the room with us.
“Munchkin!” I say, before I think it over. What are you doing here?”
“You, dressed like that? Cries of pain? Where else am I going to want to go?” And he turned to Holland Manners and said “And you should think of me as gone, but not forgotten. Ok, babe? Or do you prefer “Commandant”?"
“Lilah is a brilliant lawyer. Undeniably. But she doesn’t have much of an instinct for human resources. Or inhuman resources.” Manners said, looking at Munch with complete distaste.
I expected the dislike to carry over, but when Munch stepped away, Manners adjusted his injured assets and looked at me with a goofy captivated expression on his face. I don’t even want to *think* about that.
”I haven’t paid you yet.” Manners says, goofy look in place.
“That’s quite all right,” I say. “You’ll get my invoice.”
“ Just a gratuity, then. That last part really added to my enjoyment of our game. It’s too bad you can’t stay longer.”And he threw five hundred dollars on the table like Kleenex.
I try to act cool, like that happens all the time. My first instinct was to stuff the cash in my bra, but I remembered that the other secret stuff was in there, so I handed the money to Munch who had switched faces and was working his best vampire intimidation on Manners(It still scared *me*, for Crissake. Manners was probably gonna have to change his imported underwear. I kept my cop face on the whole time.)
“The Mistress has another engagement.”
”In Redmond,” I offered.
“Ah,” Munch said. “The Evil Empire...well, I expect they’re just The Empire to you, nu?”
Manners didn’t say anything but I could feel his gaze like a laser on my butt.Maybe if I’d spit on him, we’d be engaged.
I made one more sweep through the main room then told Hallie I had to get my coat. “Oh, you leaving?”she said, with such real disappointment I was almost sorry to give up Katrina’s life. Very few people, especially women, have ever felt that way about me. I can be a real bull in a china shop sometimes, not to mention knowing stuff most people would rather forget.
“Yeah. Early start in the morning.”
“Oh, hon,” Halfrek said, making me pause. Could this demon be a Balmer girl? “Oh, isn’t that funny...Felicia in the office says that, and now we all do it...cute, right?...apologize to your friend...he can’t be Felicia’s client. He doesn’t look like a cop.”
“Oh, no. Don’t make me laugh.” Holy shit...Felicia’s a...but Munch and I have a bigger conversation in store.
Munchkin and I are now even. For Pratt, for everything. But I am still sad that after looking at slime and blood all day, there is no way I can face blood at night too. If I was going to change my life for a creature of the night, it would be for him. But, for whatever reason, I’m alive. I have to choose the living world, and guys that sweat.
Munch and I walk out together.
”Oh, thank God,” I say, and pull my hair back. Was it my imagination or was he looking at my neck?”Don’t look at my neck. You’re creeping me out.”
“I’m sorry. Where should I look?”
“Anywhere else.”
“Well, I’m open to suggestions.”
“In the interests of regaining my respectability, I’m not touching that.”
“If I had a dollar for every time a woman told me that.”
“Look, Munchkin...”
“I’m going home, Kay.”
Oh, God, this felt like losing him all over again. “You don’t have to...stake yourself, John. V...creatures in your situation can live for a long time on animal blood.”
“Not ‘ashes to ashes dust to dust’ home, Kay. Just Charm City...and you can say it. I’m a vampire. You might want to practice, what with your ghostbusting gig, babe. Cause we’re lobbying for Creatures of Photophobia, but I don’t think it’s gonna catch on. I sense a real backlash...some demons feel it’s too politically correct.”
What the hell was he talking about? “Damn it, Howard. Don’t look so puzzled. I’m kidding. Remember? I told you once there was nothing I wouldn’t joke about, and there’s not. Okay?”
“I’m sorry...it’s been a long...life, lately, Munchkin.” I looked down at my shoes. One heel was hanging on by a thread. “I hope these shoes aren’t favorites of Cordy’s. They’re toast.”
“That’s been going around. This year’s been a rough one for shoes.”And he got that soft look he always gets about the shooting.I would never think he had it in him, if I hadn’t seen it.
He stopped walking abruptly and he asked “Would you really care? If I ate the big Dustbuster, I mean.”
“Of course,” I say. “No question.” I thought he was going to ask me something hard. But Munch questions usually come in parts, so I waited.
“Of course,” he says. “Kay, my God, you are amazing. In the world right now, there are probably ten women who don’t care that I died...followed by another three or four who wish they knew where my grave was so they could dance on it.”
“Munch, don’t, ok? This is hard enough, huh?”
“I know it bothers you, but technically I’m...10-7.” He pauses, waving away my attempts to talk. “And you, Kay Howard, have dragged yourself across the country, have seen me change my physical being, and yet, this doesn’t repulse you.”
“It repulses me a little, “ I admit. “But you’re my bunky. I owe you, huh?”