That's what everyone says, and I expect I will, but honestly, it really does take a mule team to drag me to watch scifi. And since I don't like westerns either? I've been extremely resistant.

If it hellllps, deb, before this fall I knew nothing about scifi, and was definitely suspicious of westerns, and still I love Firefly like I have loved no other show before. It's good *art*. It's amazing. I'd like to break each episode down and write about how *exactly* wonderful it is. I luvv this show, and cry copious salty tears because it isn't on every Friday.

Re. POV: I haven't yet met one I haven't found done both elegantly and execrably. That's the story, for me. But if I had to choose, I would probably go with close-loose/switching third perfect, as wld most people.

Lizard! It's the Lizard! She still runs free and occasionally wanders past my view! How lovely.

I was going to post this in my LJ and just put the link here, then I thought, "Come on, it's the Bitches, you've always posted chunks here. Don't get all LJ-smug on them now."

So, the next chunk of V!Giles, here first. Then in my LJ.

Buffy looked at the papers and book, frowning at the odd symbols. "So what have you got?"

Giles arranged the papers for her. "We've found a location that should be safe for all of us. It's a place Anya has been, so we can prepare for the conditions. We just need to go over the words of the spell a few times and we'll be ready to go."

"How long will we be gone? And is this going to be one of those an hour here is like a day there things?"

"I don't believe so. It has to do with the proximity of the dimensional planes in relation to--" He broke off at the look on Buffy's face. "They're close enough that the time flow should be very similar."

"I want to ask how, but it would be like all those times you tried to explain physics to me, wouldn't it."

Giles managed not to laugh. "I'm afraid so. Though Willow would be happy to tutor you, as always."

Willow bounced. "This is so cool, Buffy! And it makes sense. The hard part is to make sure you have the proper name of the dimension and you know what language to use in the spell. The language itself partially invokes the dimension, and the rest of the incantation forms the portal." She settled down a little. "And, yeah, it's kind of like physics."

"We can get back, right? I mean, if the two of you are going to be doing the spell to open the portal, won't you need two to open it coming back?"

"Oh, of course we can get back," Giles said. "I want Willow's help for safety's sake. Plus, I don't think I could stop her." Willow grinned back at him. "But I know the spell for a portal that will bring us back here. Which explains why the Council insists all Watchers learn Sumerian, which is one of the earliest human languages to have a magical vocabulary."

Getting both Giles and Willow back on track when there was fascinating stuff to discuss was like pushing a shopping cart with a bad wheel. "When do we go?"

Willow and Giles looked at each other. "Twenty minutes?" Willow said. Giles nodded. "Twenty minutes."

Buffy blew her hair back out of her eyes. "So what do I pack?"

They quietly spread the word about the imminent departure. When Buffy went up to consult with Xander on the Knights, Spike abandoned his torment-Xander post to track down Giles.

"You're an idiot, you know," he said when he found the other vampire, who was sweeping debris from a section of the courtyard. Willow was shooing the chickens back into their coop, using unladylike language that would have upset the Humane Society.

Giles barely looked up. "No, I'm not. Portal travel isn't done on a regular basis, but the theory is well understood." He glanced around and moved closer. "Though I don't blame you for being leery, if you've had a bad experience. How did it happen?"

"Voodoo priestess in New York. Booby trap in her hougon. She was after vampire parts for a spell. I was for parts, and she sent Dru through the portal as a present for the creatures on the other side. She had a power-sharing deal with them, had to feed them occasionally. I had to go in after her. Dalton and the boys made the bitch keep the portal open, then we chopped her up once me and Dru were back." He studied the darkness for a while. "I kind of miss Dalton. The Judge ate him. I found him in an old bookstore in Manhattan. I called him in for the Du Lac Cross thing." He shook his head firmly to stop the babbling. "Have you ever even seen a portal, Ripper?"

"Yes, I have, actually. In training. They are rather stomach turning, I agree. But Sqaon seems the wisest choice for a place to hide."

"Sqaon? Haven't heard of it."

"It's Anya's land of perpetual Wednesday. Not a term useful for spell casting, so we had to get her to remember its proper name. Excuse me, I need to finish sweeping, then we're ready to go."

Spike nodded and wandered off, finding his way to the bus. Buffy was already there, searching under the seats for something. Spike hesitated, then simply said, "Excuse me," stepped over her and went to the back.

Buffy pulled her head from under the seat and looked at him, puzzled. Still, she shouldn't complain about not having to deal with rude chatter. She found her boots and started to leave, then sat down on a seat to change shoes. "Spike?"

He straightened from the pile of stuff he'd built Giles' hidey-hole from, looking wary. "Yes?"

"Thank you for staying to look after Mom. And for looking after her and Dawn through all this."

Spike shrugged. "No big deal."

"I think it is. I know what you've always promised about what you'd do when you got the chip out. But you haven't done it. You've helped us, instead." She looked at her hands. "I--was kind of relieved, knowing you were looking out for them when I couldn't. I'm not going to ask why, just--thanks."

Spike settled into a seat several rows behind her. "No matter what I ever planned, even when I planned horrible things for you, I never meant any harm to Joyce or the Niblet. I don't know if that's the monks' doing, playing with my memories and all, but there it is. And it's not just because I'm trying to get in good with you," he added, just a little bitterly.

"Just because I'm glad you're protecting Mom and Dawn doesn't mean I trust you."

He managed to smile. "Just means you're not stupid. You may never believe that I love you, and you may never love me back. Doesn't change how I feel. And I am grateful you trust me with your family. No one will lay a hand on your mum, not while I can still crawl."

"Thank you." She looked out the window and saw Willow and Giles conferring in the clean spot of the courtyard. "I think it's time. Spike, if this doesn't work, if we get stuck or something--"

"Skip that part, I've got a good imagination."

"Yeah. Anyway, I'm not going to be here to deal with Glory. And she's going to be pissed."

Spike scratched at the healing spot on his head. "I've got some payback scheduled for her. Between me, Red, who's got her own reasons, and Rambo Harris, we should be able to manage something."

Buffy stood up, tested the fit of her boots, and nodded. "Good enough, then." She started to leave, then looked back one more time. "What are you going to do to Xander?"

The old, joyfully evil smirk made a brief reappearance. "Don't know yet. Lovely watching him squirm, though."

"Don't you hurt him."

"I don't think he'd appreciate you trying to fight his battles for him, luv."

God, a guy thing. She did not have time for this. She spared one more glare then left the bus.

Everyone gathered around for last farewells. Xander hugged Dawn, then Buffy. "I'm going to go keep an eye on our friends. They might try to stop this."

"Be careful," Buffy said, of the dozens of things she wanted to. "Keep an eye on everybody for me."

"Sure thing." He kissed her on the cheek and headed back to his position on the wall.

Willow watched Giles looking around fretfully. "What's wrong?"

"I know I'm forgetting something, but what--"

"Ripper! Catch!" Spike, sauntering from the bus, tossed a long item to Giles, who smiled and caught it.

"Yes, precisely. Thank you, Spike." Giles drew the longsword, checked the edge, resheathed it, then buckled it across his chest so that the sword rode on his back. "Buffy, would you like some weapons? I believe we brought a crossbow."

"No, I'm good." She glanced at Dawn, then they went to Joyce, who hugged them tightly.

"Be careful, you two," she whispered.

Dawn sniffled and nodded. Buffy managed not to squish her mother when she hugged back. "You stay under cover, you. Please. OK?"

"OK." Joyce pushed them back. "Best get a move on."

Buffy nodded and headed back. Dawn hesitated, then ran towards Spike, who gave an audible oof when she hit him. He hugged her as tightly as a vampire who didn't want to hurt someone could.

"Look after Mom," Dawn said.

"I will. You mind your sis, now--and Ripper, so long as it doesn't seem like he's--"

"Like he's trying to kill me, right." She looked over her shoulder to where Buffy waited with mixed impatience and uncertainty. Dawn kissed Spike's cheek. "Don't bite anybody."

"Nobody who doesn't want me to. Go on."

Dawn ran to Buffy, who was almost glaring at Spike, then at her sister. Dawn only smiled at her pleasantly.

Giles sighed. "Are we ready?"

Willow hugged Buffy and Dawn. "I'm ready."

"All right, then. Together."

Willow nodded, took a deep breath, and waited for Giles' nod. They began to chant.

The air in the courtyard vibrated, then began to turn. The chickens in their coop squawked loudly.

Out in the Knights' camp, the horses stamped nervously. Xander watched one of the monks run up to General Gregor, who was glaring at the gate. The General listened a moment, then strode to the gate.

"You can just back off there, General," Xander called. "Our hour isn't up yet."

Giles, still chanting, glanced up worriedly, then at Spike. Spike nodded and ran up the steps to join Xander.

The General glared at Xander. "There is foul sorcery afoot, boy! I demand you stop and turn over the Key."

"We have an hour, General. You will get your answer then." Xander glared at Spike but made room for him.

"What is that spell your wizards are casting?"

"I don't know much about magic." He hefted the M16 to port arms. "I know weapons. Do you?"

His knightly order may shun modern technology, but General Gregor obviously recognized it. He stepped back.

Down in the courtyard, the wind had become visible and thick with light. Giles and Willow raised their voices to be heard over the wind. A tiny vortex appeared, slowly spinning larger.

In the doorway of the chapel, Tara watched the portal form. "Giggling stones jump," she whispered, moving forward. Sister Agnes, watching the proceedings next to her, gently took her arm.

"Best stay back, nina."

Tara frowned at the nun. "Pictures tear. Black words eat. The red turns black."

"Go inside, Taracita. This is upsetting you."

Gregor stood below Xander. "Cease this magic. Give us the Key."

Xander flicked off the safety on the rifle. "No."

"Then you give me no choice." Gregor turned to go to his troops.

Xander rose smoothly, put the rifle to his shoulder, and fired a single shot into the ground at Gregor's feet.

Buffy whirled. "Xander, no!"

Spike waved her back. "Warning shot, keep going!"

Xander watched Gregor's livid face through the scope. "You've got lots of choices, General. You're the only one who can make them. And I already know what my choices are."

A last shout from Willow and Giles, and the vortex bloomed into full life. The wind whipped out across the courtyard, then stillness fell, leaving a swirling silver hole in the air.

Which is where my pen ran out of ink and my fingers gave out on the transcribing. Still, thrills and angst and pain, all on the express track coming your way.

Right, well...

Continued from P.M. Marcontell "Bitchy Fic: It Could Be Plot Bunnies" May 3, 2003 4:29:39 am PDT

***

Angel's living quarters had been designed especially for him, and didn't look like they belonged in the upper levels of a modern office building. The hardwood floors, Art Deco furniture, and lush Persian rugs all seemed to belong in a period film. Sketches of people and places Angel had known graced the dark plum walls, their simple black frames blending in with the shadows thrown by the numerous sconces. During the day, thick velvet curtains shielded the rooms from sunlight, more out of choice than neccessity. Ordinarily, Wesley found the place soothing, but nothing had been ordinary for the last couple of weeks.

"It doesn't really surprise me."

"What doesn't, Angel?"

His friend turned from the drawing he'd been examining, a placid expression on his face. "Buffy not wanting to see me."

"You're not disappointed?"

Angel shrugged his shoulders. "If I am, I'll get over it. I've lived through worse. You seem more upset by it than I am, Wes. What I can't figure out is why."

There was no sense in prevaricating; Angel could almost always tell if he was doing so. "I want her," he stated. "And I'm worried about that affecting my judgment. I am also concerned because the desire appears to be mutual, and she's in a very vulnerable place right now."

"Did you suggest she come see me because you thought it would be good for her, or because you thought it would prevent anything from happening between you two?"

"I shouldn't be telling you any of this, should I?"

"I'd get it out of you one way or another."

He would have, and in all likelihood, with little to no difficulty. Angel knew him better than anyone else. The number of bonds, betrayals, and bereavements between them was testament to that. After all their years working together in one form or another, Angel remained the closest thing to family Wesley possessed.

"Perhaps a bit of both," he admitted. "Though either way, I did have her best interests at heart."

One dark eyebrow quirked upwards. "Do you really think you'd be that bad for her?"

"My record with women is only slightly less disastrous than yours, Angel."

Angel walked over and sat down across from him, frowning slightly before answering. "Good point."

"Do you have any suggestions?"

"You mean other than don't kill her friends and terrorize her family?"

The tone was more rueful than flippant, but Wesley still glared at him. "As she hasn't either, yes, other than that."

"Not really, Wes. Buffy's Buffy, there's no getting around that. She'll make you feel crazy and off balance, drive you up the wall half the time, and you'll still find yourself willing to do almost anything to protect her." There was perhaps a threat contained within the words, or at the very least, a warning.

"You still miss her, don't you?"

"Sometimes."

They sat quietly for a time, the soft strains of some piano concerto, on too low for Wesley to identify it, the only sound. He looked over to the sketch Angel had been examining earlier; it was one of a much-younger Buffy, her mouth stretched in a half smile as she slept. The girl in the drawing scarcely resembled the woman living with him. If he hadn't known her then, he wouldn't have thought it the same person.

"Angel?"

"Yeah?"

"How can you forgive me for what happened to her?"

The response was carefully, painfully, neutral. "It's not like you had much of a choice."

"Neither did she."

• **

Buffy set down her hamper and steeled herself to confront her host.

She'd been here for seven weeks now. At six, the doctor gave her a clean bill of health. As usual, he wasn't telling her anything her body hadn't already mentioned; she only went to see him because Wesley had started bugging her about it again when she mentioned wanting to pick up her training where she'd left off.

Her first serious workout in nearly three months left her frustrated and winded. She'd lost a little flexibility and more than a little strength, and she wasn't very happy about either. At least it gave her something to do while she was stuck in the house. Her last day of freedom had been spent shopping for books and movies, but that had been three weeks ago, and she was running low on both.

Outside of bugging her about going to the doctor, Wesley had been doing a good job of avoiding her. He was usually gone when she woke up, and he'd go back to work after dinner four nights out of five during the week. When he was forced to talk to her, he was polite but distant.

She supposed he meant well, even if it did have the effect of making her feel more alone with him in the house than when he was gone. Actually, that was probably the point, but if it didn't stop soon, she was going to start hitting things. With a sigh, she lifted her hand and knocked on the door to his room.

"Come in."

"Laundry?" she asked, stepping gingerly into his space. It wasn't totally an excuse; she hadn't done it yet for the week.

He didn't lift his head from the book in front of him as he gestured towards the wicker hamper at the foot of his bed.

Buffy forced herself to keep her voice light. "You're really frustrating sometimes. You know that, right?"

Maybe it hadn't been as light as she thought, based on his clipped response. "It's for your own good."

"Wes--"

"Buffy, don't." He set the book down and looked at her, his eyes troubled. "Don't make this any harder than it is."

"I'm not the one doing that." She sat down next to him, careful to not brush against him. "We should talk."

"I thought you were here for the laundry."

"It can wait." She looked at him expectantly.

With a stifled sigh, he caved. "How are you feeling?"

"Stiff. I think I overdid it again yesterday. I'm not used to having to hold back."

"Turn around."

"What?"

He put his hands on her shoulders, turned her ninety degrees, and started to rub them gently. "Does that help at all?"

She closed her eyes and leaned into his hands. "Mmm-hmm. It's nice. You're good at this."

"I've had a fair amount of practice."

"I can tell."

Light pressure up and down either side of her spine loosened the tight muscles in her back and neck. He rubbed her shoulders for a while longer before starting to work on her arms. "This is more than just stiffness from overexertion, isn't it?"

"Told you you were frustrating."

"Are you sleeping any better?"

She hadn't been, but it wasn't worse either. "I'm fine." She watched the rhythmic motion of his fingers against her skin, fascinated by the steady movements. "Mostly." Pulling away reluctantly, she stood and gathered his hamper. "Are you going out?"

Wesley shook his head. "I'm making more progress here; I don't want to lose any momentum."

Balancing both hampers, she made her way to the laundry room. Washing the clothes made her feel useful, but she hated the small, windowless place. She sorted it quickly: three loads worth, whites, blacks, and colors. The whites went in first to get them out of the way. Hopefully, the bleach smell wouldn't be too bad when she went to swap them over.

There were still a couple of hours of daylight left, and it probably wouldn't be too dangerous to just walk around the block. Buffy weighed safety against boredom. Boredom won. She took her keys and let herself out of the house.

The walk was uneventful, but by the time she got back to the house, she was shaking. Every noise or footstep she'd heard had made her jump, and she'd managed to convince herself twice that she was being followed. The scent of chlorine still clung to the laundry room, so she tried breathing through her mouth as she put the whites in the dryer and started the next load.

• **

Frantic screams woke him from a sleep that hadn't been especially sound to start with. Wesley fumbled for his robe, throwing it on as he hurried to Buffy's room. The alarm hadn't gone off, so it couldn't be anything more than a nightmare. It sounded as bad or worse than the one she had suffered the first night under his roof.

The sheets were tangled around her legs and arms, twisting like ropes as she fought in her sleep. He dodged flailing limbs as best he could while he tried to shake her awake; she connected with his chest and the side of his face before coming to.

It was worse than the first night. Wide eyes dark with fright stared at him without recognition from the pallid face, and she shrank away when he reached for her.

"Buffy?"

When she spoke, her voice was small and shaky. "I'm fine."

"You're not fine."

He lifted her from the bed and carried her to the living room, setting her down on the couch and covering her with a blanket. The kettle then went on to boil while he got out the tea, the cups, and a bottle of whisky. Both cups received a healthy splash of the last item.

She took the cup from him, frowning a little at the taste, but drinking it never the less.

"Worse night than normal," she explained, handing him the empty mug.

"So I'd gathered from the screaming. You're not usually quite so loud."

Buffy gave him a wan smile. She was still too pale, but the shaking had lessened. Hers, at least. Looking at his hands, he realized he was shaking as well. He refilled her tea, adding more whisky to his own cup as he realized he wouldn't be sleeping again for at least an hour.

"You're face is starting to bruise," she told him. "Did I hit you? My hand feels like it hit something."

"Once in the face with your hand, and twice in the ribs with your knees. More tea?"

Her expression was bland and her response flat and final. "More whisky."