It's called a blaster, Will, a word that tends to discourage experimentation. Now, if it were called the Orgasmater, I'd be the first to try your basic button press approach.

Xander ,'Get It Done'


Buffista Fic: It Could Be Plot Bunnies  

Where the Buffistas let their fanfic creative juices flow. May contain erotica.


Am-Chau Yarkona - Nov 11, 2002 3:07:06 am PST #351 of 10001
I bop to Wittgenstein. -- Nutty

Can somebody help me? I have the first two lines of a filk of Rudyard Kipling's If, but I don't have a copy in any of my poetry books, and I need to check I'm remembering the thing right. I feel sure there should be somewhere I can go on-line, but I don't know where. Any thoughts?


erikaj - Nov 11, 2002 6:31:32 am PST #352 of 10001
Always Anti-fascist!

bartelby.com? I'm gonna start the Oz, Willow, Veruca, fic today, I think.


Am-Chau Yarkona - Nov 11, 2002 6:40:12 am PST #353 of 10001
I bop to Wittgenstein. -- Nutty

Thanks erikaj- but I found a copy at everypoet.com. Anyone intrested in seeing the end result?


erikaj - Nov 11, 2002 6:55:24 am PST #354 of 10001
Always Anti-fascist!

I'll take a look, but I'm still new to The Beta. I did it for Ple once.


Am-Chau Yarkona - Nov 11, 2002 7:22:40 am PST #355 of 10001
I bop to Wittgenstein. -- Nutty

Well, I'm doing well today, cos here it is. Comments welsome, escpecially about the metre- I think it's kind of crackly in places. In 'quotes speech' becuase I couldn't get it to format properly otherwise.

If- Angelus version

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and turning into dust,
If you can trust yourself when minions doubt you,
While avoiding losing them likewise to dust,
If you can hunt- and enjoy the hunting,
Or, feeling hunger, quickly sate it,
Or, needing loving, get on to fucking,
And yet not get so much that your Sire hates it;
If you can drink- and not make blood your master;
If you can think- and still crash stupidly on;
If you can meet with Slayers and Disaster
And not let either render you truly gone;
If you can bear to see the Childe you’ve Sired
Staked by a Slayer for he was a fool,
Or see the death of a demon you’ve hired,
And somehow keep your plan, your cool;
If you can make one heap of all the bodies,
And leave it- unguarded- at your perimeter,
Where it can be found by anybodies
Who want to lay your body to a beater;
If you can force your blood and brain and sinew
To serve your turn long after you are dead,
And so hold on when there’s only demon in you
To the ‘I’ that’s you within your head;
If you can rule an Order and keep your post,
Or fight with Slayers- nor lose the bar brawl touch
If neither foes nor family send you running to the coast
If all men will count you, but none as such;
If you can fill an unforgiving township,
With pillage, rape and mayhem wild,
Yours is the Earth and every maiden in it,
And- which is more- you’ll be a vamp, my Childe!


§ ita § - Nov 11, 2002 10:42:21 am PST #356 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

Hee! I like it.

Of course, now I think everyone should have their own "If".


Am-Chau Yarkona - Nov 11, 2002 11:04:26 am PST #357 of 10001
I bop to Wittgenstein. -- Nutty

If I could write all the voices...


erikaj - Nov 11, 2002 11:48:49 am PST #358 of 10001
Always Anti-fascist!

Yeah, that was great.


Am-Chau Yarkona - Nov 11, 2002 1:01:44 pm PST #359 of 10001
I bop to Wittgenstein. -- Nutty

You liked? You really liked? Wow! Okay, I got some feedback on ff.n- on another story, too- and I'm kinda high. Funny how these things throw you all the way up in the air, isn't it?

I think I might be able to make a Buffy version- but I can't get Spike to work at all.


Katie M - Nov 11, 2002 1:04:28 pm PST #360 of 10001
I was charmed (albeit somewhat perplexed) by the fannish sensibility of many of the music choices -- it's like the director was trying to vid Canada. --loligo on the Olympic Opening Ceremonies

Well, which Spike? William-who-wants-to-be-Spike? Spike-who-wants-to-be-a-man?