Mal: Take your people and go. Captain: You would have done the same. Mal: We can already see I haven't.

'Out Of Gas'


Spike's Bitches 33: Weeping, crawling, blaming everybody else  

[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risque (and frisque), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.


DavidS - Jan 03, 2007 9:50:45 am PST #8650 of 10004
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

So apparently my babywrangling skills need a little work ...

This would be a good time to dig into the fetish catalog and wear something all latex if there's going to be a lot of soup flinging.


Amy - Jan 03, 2007 9:52:51 am PST #8651 of 10004
Because books.

Sadly, there are no baby-wrangling skills anywhere that compete with a toddler entranced with messes. They make 'em, we just get to clean 'em up.


Atropa - Jan 03, 2007 9:53:21 am PST #8652 of 10004
The artist formerly associated with cupcakes.

This would be a good time to dig into the fetish catalog and wear something all latex if there's going to be a lot of soup flinging.

Yep, time to dig out the PVC governess uniform. Thankfully, I had managed to remove the cup with the last of the soup about a minute before she decided to flip her tray on the floor. She looked so happy when she did that, too.


Aims - Jan 03, 2007 9:55:33 am PST #8653 of 10004
Shit's all sorts of different now.

Sadly, there are no baby-wrangling skills anywhere that compete with a toddler entranced with messes. They make 'em, we just get to clean 'em up.

A-Fucking-Men.

Em emptied the lower shelf of the bookcase yesterday while I was in another room. She came and got me, took me over to the pile, and said, UH-OH! Mess! Mess, Mommy!"

I told her to put the books back. She did three.

I wonder if she piled them there because that's her time-out spot.....?

(PS. I can't believe I'm a time-out parent. I always swore I wouldn't be. Buy hey - they work.)


DavidS - Jan 03, 2007 9:57:19 am PST #8654 of 10004
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

I always swore I wouldn't be.

Why? Did you plan on using a cat o' nine tails?


tommyrot - Jan 03, 2007 9:58:17 am PST #8655 of 10004
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.

Did you plan on using a cat o' nine tails?

She thought that by the time she had kids they would have invented baby-wrangling robots.


Aims - Jan 03, 2007 9:59:22 am PST #8656 of 10004
Shit's all sorts of different now.

Why? Did you plan on using a cat o' nine tails?

No. I planned on having a perfect, mischief-free child.

bats eyelashes


Amy - Jan 03, 2007 10:02:30 am PST #8657 of 10004
Because books.

They're always so proud of their messes, too. "I did dat!" Um, yay.

Sara imitates me perfectly. Sometimes she walks into the living room, surveys the battlefield of Mr. Potato Head and Little People parts, and shakes her head sadly: "What a mess."


DavidS - Jan 03, 2007 10:02:57 am PST #8658 of 10004
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

No. I planned on having a perfect, mischief-free child.

Planning may not be your forte.

::glances discreetly at seam running down the middle of new dress::


Lee - Jan 03, 2007 10:07:15 am PST #8659 of 10004
The feeling you get when your brain finally lets your heart get in its pants.

No. I planned on having a perfect, mischief-free child.

With a mouth like a sewer rat?