Okay, that is in line with what I thought.

I'm not mad at either of them, or anything. Just confused.

There was one group dinner in honour of someone leaving where two of the diners refused to split the bill evenly, since they'd purposely ordered the cheapest food.

But it was an in-honour dinner--you know you're going to pay for more than just your meal. Do you guys usually split those evenly, or do you do the math and then add the appropriate fraction of the honouree's stuff?

As a general rule I think it's a courtesy to split the bill, but I think people have the right to request to pay for only the food they ordered instead. I don't think either happens more frequently when I go out. If you are only paying for the food you ordered you can still pay an even share of the honoree's portion. It's easier to split the bill under those circumstances, but I don't think it's required.

I got out of work early!!

I do admit to getting a little upset when people order lots of drinks and then want to split. I rarely drink, and get a little burnt when my portion would amount to 20 bucks and I end up spending 40 for other people's margaritas.

My group generally splits dinner bills evenly, but if someone wants to do otherwise, we whip out the calculators and spend a few minutes laughing at our collective inability to do simple math even with tools. But if your group doesn't have a standing rule like last-people-at-the-table-pay, then yeah, I'd say your friends made a faux pas. Like you, though, I'd let it go unless it became a habit.

I've seen it done both ways. My friends just tend to split evenly unless there is a significant difference in what was ordered. If we were paying for someone else, we'd then tack on the fraction.

Work-people gatherings, it seems to be pretty much pay-your-own way, plus split the honoree's tab however many ways. Probably because there is less room for misunderstanding that way.

Whenever my once-a-week dinner friends had dessert, my share would be a few bucks less because I never ordered dessert in 7 years of going out, but the rest of our orders were roughly equivalent.

I do admit to getting a little upset when people order lots of drinks and then want to split. I rarely drink, and get a little burnt when my portion would amount to 20 bucks and I end up spending 40 for other people's margaritas.

Yeah, exactly. I don't want other people to underwrite my drinking.

If you are only paying for the food you ordered you can still pay an even share of the honoree's portion.

That just seems like too much fuss for me. If I'm that constrained, I just wouldn't go. Requesting the bill be split when there's no honouree--that doesn't bother me any. I don't bring it up, but I'm fine with it.

In fact, I usually ask someone else to do the math anyway.

As for bill splitting when you didn't consume much--I never consume much, either food or drink-wise. But I factor it in as a risk of doing business, and don't go if I can't assume said risk.

Either way stings.

If I suspect I'm going to be consuming much less than the people I'm with, I just ask the server for a separate check when I place my order. They may not like it, but they'll do it. Then if there's an honoree I pitch in my share.

As for bill splitting when you didn't consume much--I never consume much, either food or drink-wise. But I factor it in as a risk of doing business, and don't go if I can't assume said risk.

I don't think I'll ever be able to have this mindset. (eta: accepting it as a risk of doing business. It may be a common practice, but it is less than ideal and it's going to bug me to the point of not participating in it and being that bitch at the table.) I have to admit to muttering the sheer gall of .... when people take advantage. Extenuating circumstances I get. Pattern of behavior, nsm.